Table of contents:
- 1. Find out the position of your company
- 2. Think about the consequences
- 3. Avoid Power Imbalances
- 4. Do not sort things out in the workplace
- 5. Talk less about dating
- 6. Be prepared to take drastic action
- 7. Finish nicely
2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44
How to follow your heart and at the same time remain professional.
When people regularly spend time together, a romantic relationship will inevitably develop between them. Back in the late 1960s, social psychologists discovered that we tend to find attractive those we often see. During the study, subjects were shown photographs of multiple faces. Some pictures were shown up to 25 times, others appeared only 1–2 times. The more often the participants came across a photo of a certain person, the more willingly they reported that they liked that person.
This theory is also confirmed by statistics. Research Service HeadHunter reports that 41% of employees have relationships with colleagues, with 18% of such relationships leading to marriage. According to VTsIOM, 64% of Russians consider intrigues at work "the norm of life", and 26% are critical of such situations, but are ready to accept them.
Apparently, people cannot do without office romances. Here are some tips on how to make them enjoyable and painless for both parties.
1. Find out the position of your company
According to a Vault.com study, 41% of employees are unaware of their company’s office romance policies. It is possible that the organization has some kind of attitudes in this regard, they just are not too advertised. At the wrong time, information about your personal relationships may come up and play against you.
Of course, you have the right to privacy and the ban can only be unspoken. However, if the management does not approve of such things, the situation can become unpleasant. So it's best to carefully find out everything in advance. Sometimes it is enough to look around: if someone meets in your department or a neighboring department and they treat it normally, then no reprisals will follow.
2. Think about the consequences
You should always think about how our actions will affect your future life, including starting a romance. However, if the acquaintance took place on neutral territory, you can relax a little and just watch where your feelings lead you. After all, nothing binds you except the desire to be together. But in the case of an office romance, the stakes are high.
If something goes wrong, the further career of one of you may deteriorate or being in the same office will become unbearable.
3. Avoid Power Imbalances
The hardest part is when one of you is the boss and the other is a subordinate. Dismissal, salary, participation in important projects - when the chosen one or the chosen one affects these aspects of your career, it is better to avoid a relationship or start it in a different status. If you are in a higher position, it is in your best interest to avoid favoritism in order to remain professional. In any case, a situation in which one person is dependent on another is fertile ground for abuse.
4. Do not sort things out in the workplace
One of the main questions is whether to advertise the relationship or not. However, the problem for the team is not the very fact of your novel, but what may follow from it. For example, violation of boundaries, in which personal life affects professional. Therefore, you should not sort things out right in the office. This is not very ethical and provides food for gossip. The same applies to manifestations of affection: colleagues do not need to see this, unless it happens in a bar where you all went for a drink in the evening.
5. Talk less about dating
Each of us has a whole set of social roles. For some we are children, for others as parents, for others as neighbors. For the chosen one or the chosen one from work, we are both a personal partner and a colleague. Balancing these roles can be difficult.
Of course, you can't do without talking about business at all, especially if you are workaholics and work for you never remains outside the office threshold. But for the sake of relationships, it is sometimes worth imposing such a moratorium. On the other hand, maybe your passion is fueled by the way your partner solves work problems, and this is how he attracted you. The main thing is to prioritize relationships when you are alone.
6. Be prepared to take drastic action
Life can give you a choice: career or relationship. At the very least, you have to choose between this particular relationship and this particular job. Judging by the polls, in Russia every third person is ready to sacrifice a workplace for the sake of love. Whatever your final decision, you need a clear position.
7. Finish nicely
Staying friends is a challenge many broken-up couples fail. However, if you met with a colleague, and now you are trying to forget about what happened, this is just the case when a bad world is better than a good quarrel. Provided, of course, that you both stayed in the same company. If not, and the relationship ended badly, you can safely block your ex-partner in all social networks, after sending an angry rebuke.
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