8 ways to charm a person

1. Smile

We look at a person's face for less than 0.1 second and already form an opinion about it J. Willis, A. Todorov. First impressions: Making up your mind after a 100-ms exposure to a face / Psychological Science. That is, the first impression we make depends on our emotions and facial features.

According to one study A. Todorov, A. N. Mandisodza, A. Goren, C. C. Hall. Inferences of competence from faces predict election outcomes / Science, you can predict the outcome of political elections by the face of a candidate. And another experiment J. Duarte, S. Siegel, L. Young. Trust and credit: The role of appearance in peer-to-peer lending / Review of Financial Studies showed that those whose appearance was not credible were less likely to receive credit. At the same time, good credit history and income statement did not play a primary role.

The happier we look, the more they trust us and the better people around us treat us. Smiling is the key to liking. And even if the first impression turned out to be a failure, there is still a chance to establish contact with the person. If you charm him, he will change his negative opinion of you.

Be friendly and smile when meeting people.

2. Don't be afraid to speak

To please people is a very useful quality that will come in handy in life. Sociable entrepreneurs are more often R. A. Baron, G. D. Markman. Beyond social capital: How social skills can enhance entrepreneurs' success / AMPs succeed, and employees with advanced communication skills climb the career ladder more easily. Communication skills are extremely important these days. Many companies are moving away from a hierarchical structure where the employee was afraid to put his word in.

Not everyone finds it easy to talk to a stranger or carry on any kind of conversation. Even if it seems to you that you are a hopeless introvert, try to train your communication skills.

3. Raise your eyebrows

Three things that tell our brain that a person is not dangerous to us are his smile, his slightly tilted head, and raised eyebrows. When we make contact, we involuntarily raise and lower our eyebrows. It lasts literally a split second. Do not overdo it.

4. Listen

Show a genuine interest in what the person is saying. Each person is interesting in its own way, and from almost every conversation you can learn something useful and exciting.

If you can't seem to get interested in his story, carefully consider the iris of the interlocutor's eyes. This kind of prolonged eye contact will make him think that you are really caught up in his speech.

5. Praise

But don't confuse this with flattery. If a person shines from the inside, tell him about it. First, it's a great way to start a conversation. Secondly, he will be imbued with sympathy for you, will be grateful for the compliment and will share his joy. Everything is in the black.

6. Look for common ground

Try to do this, even if your opinions do not coincide in many ways. Listen to the point of view of the interlocutor, do not interrupt him. Perhaps you will agree with some of his arguments.

7. Repeat the body language of the interlocutor

If the interlocutors repeat the movements and facial expressions of each other, then the contact is established. This way you can even check how well the conversation is going. Sit a little differently and see if the person did the same.

8. Ask personal questions

Use this trick when you need to like someone as soon as possible. It works the other way too. Share something personal about yourself to earn the person's trust. But do not dump on the interlocutor all the information about yourself at once. Serve it in portions. Then every story you tell will impress him and keep you interested.