5 steps on the path to changes in yourself and life

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

A universal scheme for those who want to get long-term results.

Have you ever tried convincing another person to lose weight or quit smoking? Chances are, your idea has failed. Even if the person agreed, he did not go from words to action.

Taking concrete action when you're mentally and emotionally unprepared for change is a recipe for failure. To gauge your readiness, use the trans-theoretical model of change developed by psychologists James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente in the 1980s.

What is the transtheoretical model of change

The transtheoretical model of health behavior change consists of five steps, through which you can achieve sustainable changes in your life.

1. Disinterest. You have no real desire to act, you do not take any action.
2. Consideration. You have desire, but no real commitment that will force you to do something.
3. Cooking. You want to take action within a month, get ready for action.
4. Action. You are taking concrete actions for change. Typically, these are the first six months of successful change.
5. Maintenance. You have been successfully changing for over half a year. You are confident that you can maintain the change, but there is still a chance of rolling back.

At each stage, you can spend a different time: from several hours to tens of years. But at the same time, the actions for moving to another stage are always the same, regardless of the person and the goal.

Each step has its own specific strategies to help remove resistance, ensure progress, and prevent rollback.

How to find your place in this model

Ask yourself two questions and mark the answers on a scale from 0 to 10.

1. How important are these changes to your life right now?
2. How confident are you that you can make these changes right now?

Now correlate this with the rung:

• 0-3 - disinterest;
• 4–7 - consideration;
• 8-10 - preparations and actions.

Now you know exactly what stage you are on, and you can work on moving to the next stage.

What to do at each stage

Step 1. Disinterest

You do not plan to do anything in the next six months, resist change, turn on the defense: "It's just not for me" or "I'm too busy, I don't have time for this." You may be demoralized by past failed attempts. Fearing another failure, you risk getting stuck at this stage for a long time.

What to do

It is important now to raise your awareness. During one week, pay attention to self-talk and note cognitive distortions - wrong thoughts that reinforce negative emotions, for example: "I will never get better", "The result is always the same, so why try."

The most common cognitive biases are:

1. Filtering thoughts - fixation on one negative circumstance. For example, you want to lose weight, but you cannot give up sugar and only think about how bad you will be without sweets.
2. Generalization - the belief that you will not succeed, because in the past it never worked. For example, you may be afraid to speak in public because of one failed speech.
3. Tendency to underestimate the positive - underestimation of the benefits that can be obtained from the changes, as well as their own ability to implement these changes. You focus on your weaknesses and failures.

Because of these mistakes, you get stuck in false beliefs and do nothing. If you are familiar with these cognitive biases, monitor and correct them. Here are some ways:

1. To combat generalization, look for examples of success in your past.
2. Brainstorm and jot down a list of what you will get from the change.
3. To get rid of negative thoughts, think about the good things in your life.
4. If you catch yourself thinking "Yes, but …", replace it with "Yes … and". For example, you think, "Yes, but if I get promoted, then I will have to do more presentations that I hate." Change that thought to this: "Yes, if I get promoted, I will do more presentations and start doing development, which is just crazy."

Step 2. Consideration

At this stage, you seriously think about the problems that you will have to face and look for ways to solve them. You already want to change, but you don't know where to start.

Good: At this stage, you begin to imagine how the changes will affect your life in a positive way. You become closer to realizing that the game is worth the candle, moving from external motivation (seeking reward and avoiding punishment) to internal (receiving pleasure and personal benefits).

What to do

1. The main way to maintain intrinsic motivation is to link change to your core values. Take the VIA Psychological Test for your character strengths and link them to change. For example, your goal is to lose weight. If your strengths are a love of learning and an appreciation for beauty, find a technically challenging sport that requires you to learn a lot and enjoy the beauty of well-defined movement.
2. Find someone who has already achieved what you want. Contact him or read his autobiography. It will inspire you and show you how to overcome difficulties.

Step 3. Preparation

You begin to change your behavior, for example, buy a membership to a fitness club or purchase the materials you need.

What to do

1. Use visualization. Imagine how you will struggle with obstacles and temptations on the way to your goal.
2. Create an environment that will help you change your life.
3. Protect your attitude. Maintain your confidence by celebrating even small victories on the way to your goal.
4. Create a WOOP plan to help you deal with any potential disruptions.

The acronym WOOP is made up of four words that describe the steps in creating a plan: wish, outcome, obstacle, and plan.

1. Desire. Describe the changes you want to bring to life in the next month.

Example: "I want to paint again."

2. Result. Provide in detail the best possible outcome.

Examples:

• "I feel peace and quiet while painting after work."
• "I will complete one painting by the end of the month."

3. Obstacle. Think about what external and internal circumstances can hinder you.

Examples:

• "It was a crazy day at work, I had to stay late."
• "I don't have the paints and brushes I need."

4. Plan. Figure out how you will deal with the circumstances.

Examples:

• “I’ll ask my boss in advance what to do before the end of the day so that I’m not late after work.”
• "I will revise the materials and order any missing paints and brushes."

Step 4. Action

You are ready for change and already bringing it to life. At the same time, you leave your comfort zone, so at any moment there may be self-doubt, self-criticism and other signs of the impostor syndrome - feelings that you are unworthy or incompetent.

Don't let perfectionism slow your growth! Allow yourself to make mistakes, treat them as feedback that will help you become better.

What to do

1. Give yourself time. It takes at least 20 hours to master a new skill. Do not quit before this time has passed, even if it seems to you that you are failing.
2. Concentrate on the present. Difficult only at first. As you get used to the new behavior, it will become simple and natural. So don't think about the future, watch how everything feels now.
3. Check your plan constantly. You can get so caught up in events that you lose sight of your values and long-term goals. Evaluate your progress periodically and correct course if you get lost.
4. Use social support. Find like-minded people, communicate on social networks, use other communication methods. If in the previous step you did not find a coach or person who will inspire you, do it now.

Step 5. Maintenance

You've been in your business for six months now. Your new behavior integrates into your lifestyle, becomes a part of your personality.

Now you are only threatened by a rollback to the previous way of life. Scientists have found Applying the stages of change that about 15% of people fail at this stage and return to disinterest.

What to do

1. Track your condition. To control your own behavior, you need to feel good. Be careful not to deplete yourself.
2. Figure out how to deal with stress. He can exhaust you and force you to return to your previous behavior. Think about the situations that annoy and upset you the most, and think of ways to deal with the stress ahead of time.

3. Prevent burnout. There is no way to protect yourself 100% from it, but you can reduce the risks.

   • Allow time for physical, mental and emotional relief.
   • Establish rituals that will help you tune in to a working mood or, conversely, relax.
   • Be clear about your time and refuse anything that distracts you from important things.
   • Connect with family and friends. If you need support, please let us know.
   • Break your goals down into small steps, such as meditating for 5 minutes a day or writing 100 words.
4. Refer to your intrinsic motivation. This is the way to keep you afloat when nothing else is helping. Remember what made you want to change, what is the main reason for your efforts?

In the process of change, you may feel like you lack the ability and skills, so that you want to give up everything. In fact, this is even good - it is a sign that you are growing and experiencing yourself. Do not give up!

Even if you roll back, remember: you can start moving up again at any time and keep the new behavior for a long time.