How I almost died in Thailand and almost became a philosopher

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Well, okay, I exaggerated "for great dramatic effect" (Goblin). Although I really felt bad. But first things first … It all started with the fact that my family and I went to Thailand for three months. Let me remind you that I wanted to leave my comfort zone and shake things up a bit. I left the comfort zone for 5 plus))

Well, okay, I exaggerated "for great dramatic effect" (Goblin).

Although I really felt bad.

But first things first…

It all started with the fact that my family and I went to Thailand for three months. Let me remind you that I wanted to leave my comfort zone and shake things up a bit.

I left the comfort zone for 5 plus))

"If you want to lose weight - ask me how" (Herbalife)

Yeah, I already lost a lot of weight many years ago - from 99 to 71 kg. But then I wanted it myself.

In Phuket, I lost another 13 kg. And this time not on their own …

What happened? I'll tell you now …

First pains

It all started on March 15th, when, having dined with papaya, I went to the beach. I didn’t manage to swim. My stomach gripped. Severe aching pain above the navel.

Poisoning? But I didn't go to the toilet. I didn't vomit. However, I took a few charcoal tablets just in case.

I suffered for 10 hours. He applied ice, lay down and courageously endured and moaned softly.

In the next 3 days, the pains recurred. Usually - one hour after eating. True, not so strong.

Self-medication

And then I wrote on VKontakte to my good friend, a doctor. Looking at the symptoms, he suggested that I had pancreatitis. I suggested that it is difficult to make a high-quality diagnosis via the Internet.

Pancreatitis is an inflammation of the pancreas. A frequent affliction of local tourists. After all, Thailand is a land of spicy food. I abused it too.

It all came together. And I started treatment.

It is quite easy to relieve the symptoms of pancreatitis. Cold, Hunger and Peace. I downloaded a book on the topic from the Internet. One of the tips in it is a 1-3 day fast. Well, OK, the more interesting.

Starvation

3-day fasting. I always wanted to try it, but the maximum was enough for me for 36 hours. And now it was not enough. Lasted only 62.

The sensations are interesting. I didn't want to eat, but all my thoughts were only about food. Paradox.

By the way, the pains disappeared completely. How amazing! Or not?

Pain again - what the hell ?

He came out of hunger on oatmeal. I ate it a couple of times - everything is OK. Then he boiled buckwheat. Liquid, overcooked.

And the pain returned. And what a!

What the heck?! This was not in the book! Maybe I don't have pancreatitis?

Liliana (my wife) got tired of looking at my self-medication, and she literally made me call the insurance company. So our medical insurance came in handy. Which, by the way, I didn't want to draw up.

Phuket International Hospital

The insurance company politely and promptly sent me to the Phuket International Hospital:

Thailand is a poor country, but the hospitals for tourists are what they need. Solid glass and concrete. Trained staff, excellent English speaking. Service at the level, in short.

I was kindly greeted and helped to fill out the questionnaire.

Then I fell into the hands of my sister. She weighed me, measured my height and pressure.

Gloomy doctor

And then I went to see the doctor. Usually Thais are smiling and friendly, but this uncle was clearly out of sorts. After listening to my confused (ay lurn english at skul) speech, he immediately diagnosed:

- Yoo hev gastritis

- Mayby pancreatitis?

- Yu fink?

- NS…. Ay dont know … (You're a doctor, e-mae!)

In short, he sent me for a blood test to rule out pancreatitis. I still believed in him))

Blood test

Blood was taken from a vein. Clean and tidy office again.

Grandmother skillfully took blood from a vein. And I went to wait for the results. 1 hour.

Gastritis

The doctor's uncle circled something in the test results and muttered “Know pancreatitis. Gastritis.

Well, gastritis, so gastritis. What's next?

And then I was prescribed a mountain of pills.

Everything is beautiful, in bags. There is also an instruction on how to take it. Damn this is convenient!

I still had time to ask what I should eat, to which the doctor briefly replied "Nospicy". Uh … and boiled buckwheat - where was it in the spicy? In short, he did not convince me of anything.

The insurance company soldered 3,500 rubles.

It didn't get any easier

Well, the diagnosis seems to be there, but there seems to be no calmness.

It was embarrassing that the doctor did not examine me, did not feel, did not scan. The only test - blood - and I asked him for that.

But everything would be fine if it were not for the pains that have not gone anywhere. I drank pills, ate oatmeal, and the pain persisted. Let not spicy, but aching and after each meal.

What the hell is this?

Fucking experimenter

The days passed. The pains gradually lessened, I perked up … And I decided to try the papaya again.

Hehe!

An hour later I was sitting in a chair at the reception (I had to take a taxi). Well, as he sat, rather, he lay hunched over.

So, I'm back in the hospital.

This time, only at the front desk I was pounded for 30 minutes - no confirmation came from the insurance company.

Cheerful doctor

The gloomy doctor was replaced by another - a merry fellow. It seemed to me that my suffering was his joy. He joked and laughed constantly.

Well, everything is better than Doctor Death from the first episode.

The merry man felt me. I asked about everything in detail. Prescribed another bunch of pills. I was surprised to find antidepressants there as well. Well, at least a high before dying))

They could not make a FGS for me - they simply did not have such equipment. Thus, it was impossible to determine the type of gastritis, and therefore, to choose a diet. Fortune-telling on coffee grounds again. Well, what the hell is all this glass and concrete and well-trained staff?

In short, darkness.

At the door, the doctor caught up with me and happily announced the important news: "It nospicy!" Oh, thanks, I haven’t kept anything sharper than oatmeal in my mouth for 20 days! Doctor Obvious …

The insurance has got to the next 3,500 rubles. The trip began to pay off quickly))

The fish that brings relief

I decided to change my tactics. Changed porridge for steamed fish and meat dishes. And a miracle happened - the pains disappeared!

I mainly ate this red fish:

The freshest - only from the sea. For a couple. She just melted in my mouth.

Coincidence or not, but the pain has almost ceased. And the weight loss stopped at around 60 kg.

We fly home - pains again

It would be boring if on the day of departure I did not have severe pains again.

This day was filled with stress (4 planes with a small child). So I gradually became convinced that my gastritis was caused precisely by stress. And indeed - the first attack of pain happened to me immediately after a conflict with one local asshole man.

However, I was already armed with a no-spa and quickly came to my senses.

Accurate diagnosis in Ufa

Thanks to a friend, I was able to do FGS 12 hours after I landed in Ufa. Tests showed mild inflammation of the stomach (gastritis) and intestines (duodenitis).

It is not contagious. If you see me - no need to cross to the other side of the street))

I was prescribed a diet. But the pills are not.

The exact causes of the disease will be clear only after 4 months, but so far the main version is stress.

So the doctor said that the main thing is to calm down. I quote: “ Become a philosopher. "

And it's funny. I went to Thailand exactly for this - for stress, for discomfort - and I got it in full. But the body could not stand it.

Well, I will learn to be a philosopher))

What lessons have I learned from all this?

Uh … self-help books teach you how to make lemonade from lemons. Let me and I try to extract something positive from this disgusting epic.

Lesson 1. Phobias are bullshit. Life goes on. My brain drew the most terrible pictures for me - both stomach cancer and a lifelong porridge-diet. But in reality, everything turned out to be not so gloomy. As it often happens. I can only refer to Leo Babauta's article "An Easy Way to Stop Worrying About Trivia." Damn right thoughts.

Lesson 2. Connections rule. Yeah, networking again. But where can you go from him? If you have friends and family who can come to your aid in difficult times, that's great. And to be honest, there is no desire to rely on the state, on the insurance company. Recently, I have not hesitated to ask people for help. It is only important not to forget to return them even more.

Lesson 3. We must learn to manage stress. I wanted to write "to deal with stress", but that would be wrong! I continue to consider stress as a good thing, which in inept hands, however, can lead a person to the grave. I will continue to step out of my comfort zone and learn to manage my stress. By the way, Tony Robbins's book helped me a lot. Coincidentally, I was reading it when I was lying on a log. I also reread the excellent Stress Resilience by Sharon Miller.

Lesson 4. Adhere to dietary rules. You know, maybe stress is to blame, but the food factor still played a role. In Thailand, delicious but unhealthy food is everywhere. I have deviated from my own nutritional principles many times.

Lesson 5. Thai medicine is bullshit. Nice, expensive, but ineffective. There are many stories like mine. Doctors do not know how to communicate with visitors. Can't explain. Can't calm down. Prescribing pills, driving them out of the office as soon as possible and receiving payment from the insurance company - that's their task. And there, you see, the tourist will fly home. Well, I would be silent, but there were no answers to my questions about nutrition. A striking contrast with Russia, where they explained everything to me clearly. And the problem here is not the language barrier.

Acknowledgments

I want to thank my friend. The girl doctor who gave me an accurate diagnosis. Our friend Elvira, a therapist, who examined and supported me in the field. And, of course, his wife Liliana, who had a hard time caring for two aching "children" at once.

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Have you encountered foreign medicine? How do you like it?