5 rules for dealing with stress for those who want to succeed

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

There are a great many ways to deal with stress: you can compensate for moral damage with tons of sweets, go headlong into computer games, or just pretend that everything that happens does not concern you. The trouble is, it doesn't solve the problem. If you really want to learn how to manage your anxiety, read the article and put its tips into practice.

There are two types of people in the world: some know that they can influence the course of events, while others believe that everything around happens by itself. The members of the first group understand that life and career are entirely in their own hands, and there are simply no other ways to achieve what they want. Representatives of the second category behave exactly like Forrest Gump: they sit and wait for the bus to take them somewhere.

University of Florida psychologist Tim Judge has shown that people who are confident and feel they are in control of their lives end up doing better in almost every endeavor. Such research participants - let's call them "responsible" - not only performed their professional duties better and mastered new tasks faster, but also had an annual income that was 50–150% higher than their colleagues' similar indicators.

Tim Judge's research revealed an interesting feature of responsible people: they do not lose their presence of mind even in the most difficult circumstances. Yes, they also feel uncomfortable, but the question is how they use their excitement.

Those in charge know that the future is entirely up to them, so worry only fuels their fervor. Despair gives way to drive, and thrill and fear are replaced by persistence.

Whether the results of their long labor have been smashed to smithereens or have once again been denied employment, they are in no hurry to raise the white flag. Life can throw up any surprises, but responsible people only double and triple their efforts.

How it works

Responsibles are superior to all others in terms of work efficiency, because the ability to control emotions and remain calm, even under the most stressful conditions, is directly related to performance. 90% of the most effective professionals share one important skill: they know how to manage their emotions.

In general, anxiety is an absolutely necessary feeling. It's hard to get down to business until we start to worry at least a little about this, this is how the human brain works. Our performance peaks with moderate levels of anxiety.

The trick is how to deal with stress and keep it within reasonable limits to maximize your performance.

We know full well that constant experiences have serious consequences for our physical and mental health. So why is it so difficult for us to overcome anxiety and thereby improve our lives? Scientists at Yale University have found the answer.

Severe stress decreases the volume of gray matter in the areas of the brain responsible for self-control. If you lose your composure, you also lose the ability to cope with anxiety.

In this state, you not only cannot protect yourself from getting into difficult situations, but you yourself create them (for example, overreacting to the words or actions of other people). Decreased self-control is especially dangerous when stress gets to physiological functions. It contributes to the development of hypertension and diabetes, leads to depression, obesity, and also reduces cognitive ability. It turns out a vicious circle, where the increasing level of feelings brings a person to complete exhaustion.

What do we have to do

If we don't know how to deal with anxiety, we will never reach our potential. Each of us gets nervous in difficult situations, but there are proven ways to overcome anxiety and fear of uncertainty - just five simple and incredibly effective steps. Before reading further, it is worth realizing one thing: right now, nothing is really defined yet, including your future. What will it be like? You decide.

Step 1. Prepare for change

No one can ever keep absolutely everything under control. Even those very responsible people from Judge's research are sometimes unemployed and their businesses are going through tough times. The difference is that they are completely ready for change and know how to use what is happening to their advantage. You can learn it too.

Periodically make a list of important events that may occur in the near future. The goal here is not to predict all the changes that you will have to face. This exercise improves your ability to meet impending changes with dignity. Even if the events on the list never become reality, the practice of preventing change and preparing for them in advance helps to believe that the future is really in your hands.

Step 2. Focus on opportunities

In our youth, all of us were firmly and firmly hammered into our heads that life is unfair. This phrase is a voice of anxiety, despair and passive inaction. Even though sometimes it is not possible to prevent unpleasant events, we are always free to choose how to respond to them.

In the list from the first paragraph, briefly write down all the possible reactions to each event. You will be surprised what an arsenal of answers can be typed for seemingly uncontrollable circumstances.

Step 3. Rewrite your life scenario

This is the most difficult thing - you have to give up what you are used to for a long time. Each of us has a certain scenario of behavior in a particular situation. So, if you want to manage your life on your own, you need to rewrite it.

Think back to any difficulties you have encountered. What prevented you then from turning the existing state of affairs to your advantage? Write down everything that happened, this will be a failure scenario. Now imagine how it would be worth leading yourself if this situation repeated itself. You wouldn't be a blunder this time, would you? This is a responsible behavior scenario that should replace the previous unfortunate one. In any difficult situation, compare your thoughts at this moment with negative and positive scenarios. This will not only help you choose the right course of action, but it will also change your way of thinking, and then your life.

Step 4: stop harassing yourself

Avoiding self-delusion in a timely manner is an important step in dealing with stress and anxiety. The more often you focus on negative thoughts, the more you give them power over you.

Most of our negative experiences are just thoughts, not facts.

As soon as you realize that you are starting to listen to the pessimistic predictions of your inner voice, immediately write down what you think. By muffling these sad arguments for at least a couple of minutes, you can more rationally and sensibly assess the degree of their truth.

Do you find the words “never”, “worst” and “ever” in your thoughts? Rest assured, these are fantasies that have nothing to do with reality. If the thoughts in writing seem plausible enough, have someone you trust read them. Let's see if he agrees with you or not.

When it seems to us that a situation will last forever or, conversely, will never happen, these are just pranks of the brain, which likes to make an elephant out of a fly and exaggerate the frequency and significance of an event. Defining a clear boundary between fact and speculation will help you break out of the vicious circle of anxiety and start moving towards new heights.

Step 5. Be grateful

Taking the time to understand what you are grateful for life or people for is important not only because it is considered good form. This behavior reduces anxiety and significantly lowers levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. Research from the University of California, Davis showed that people who regularly expressed gratitude reported marked improvements in mood and energy.

The main thing to remember is that overwhelming anxiety and self-empowerment are mutually exclusive concepts. Whenever stress kills your performance, simply follow the five steps above to become aware of your strength and regain control of the situation.