6 simple truths to help you become better

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

To understand whether it is worth reading this post, tell me honestly: are you happy with everything in your life? If not, write on the sheet or simply say out loud your five achievements (only real ones), for example, "I won a chess tournament" or "I built my dream career." If you failed to do this, or at least it was difficult, this post is for you, read on.

The world is only interested in what it can get from you

Let's imagine that a person who is very dear to you is shot. Here he lies on the asphalt, bleeding, and slowly dies, and you rush around, not knowing what to do, until the ambulance arrives.

And then an intelligent person comes up to you, he takes a knife out of his pocket and, it seems, is going to operate on a dying man right on the street. With a sense of relief, you ask him, "Are you a doctor?"

"No".

“But you know what you're going to do, right? You are probably a former army medic or …"

And then this passer-by begins to tell you that he is a great son, he lived a rich life, he is very punctual and never swears.

You listen to him, dumbfounded, and then yell, “How can any of these fucking merits stop the blood? What the fuck does it matter if my friend dies? Can you do the operation or not?"

And this madman begins to get angry: “What a selfish and narrow-minded person you are! Are you not enough of the merits that I have listed, not only that I have never forgotten about my girlfriend's birthday? In the light of all my merits, what does it matter if I can operate or not?"

“Yes, damn it, it matters! I need someone who can stop the bleeding and save my friend, not you fucking crazy bastard. A curtain.

The moral of this crazy scene is that this is the harsh truth of the adult world, and you find yourself in similar situations every day. You are a man with a pocket knife, and society is a bleeding half-corpse on the asphalt.

If it seems to you that society does not recognize or respect you, it is only because it is made up of people who have needs. They need to build a house, cook food, have fun and have sex.

The only way to be recognized and respected by society, no matter how cynical it may sound, is to see their needs and perform tasks that will satisfy the needs.… No matter how beautiful, polite and well-read you are, without it you will always remain poor and lonely.

What about kindness and love? Of course, they also exist as long as they give people things that they cannot get elsewhere.

Every situation and every person in this life needs a certain set of skills and things to be done.

Good guy? Yes, do not care

Here's a great talk from Glengarry Glen Ross (or The Americans), where a tough, violent sociopath fires all employees and invites them to earn a return with sales.

"Good guy? Yes, do not care. Great father? Fuck you! Go home and complain to your wife. If you want to work here, all that matters is sales."

Basically, this is exactly what the world is telling you, only people are usually too polite to say it in person, so they just let you go downhill.

And the most ingenious thing about this scene is that half of the people who watch this think: “How interesting is it to have such a fucking boss?”, And the other half - “Yes! Now let's go and sell whatever we need."

If you were in this room, someone would take such a speech simply for a work process, and directed all their efforts to stay in place, and someone took it personally, thought that this person was just a jerk and has no right to talk to you like that. Later, such people would seek confirmation of his hypocrisy in order to feel better.

This is the whole difference between people: offended versus motivated, and your success in this life depends on it. Someone thinks that he is not his job. But in fact, it turns out that your work is the sum of useful skills that you apply in society, this is what society sees and accepts.

For example, being a good mother is not just words, it is the sum of useful skills that this woman uses to be considered one.

That is why the one who does more useful things for society is respected more than those who do not. At the same time, useful work can be in any field: medicine, education, business or entertainment. Anything, if only it helps other people to satisfy some of their needs.

And it's not that good or bad, it just is. And if someone is now thinking about insipid materialism and the amount of money, this is not about that. Nobody talked about money at all (although it is a natural continuation of the fact that you solve someone else's problems).

What you produce doesn't have to make money, but it has to be useful

To explain with a non-commercial example, let's talk about relationships. Many single people lament why they are so cute, smart, interesting and beautiful, but they do not work out with the opposite sex.

It's all about the same benefits that you bring to people, but this time we are talking about useful qualities that must be shown.

If you say that you are interesting, you need to interest someone, that is, show this quality of yours, and be useful in this regard. If you have a great sense of humor, you need to make someone laugh, if you know how to play an instrument, play it.

Because of this, most "good people" who know all their virtues feel disgusting. If you do not show your dignity to society, it is as if they do not exist for it.

Self-loathing comes from inaction

Instead of asking yourself, "How can I get this job?" Instead of asking "How do I get to know this girl / guy?" Ask "How can I become the person these people need and what needs to be changed?"

You may have to change a lot, and then the question will arise, do you need this at all? If you decide what is needed, then go ahead, do what it takes to become "that person."

If you can't do what you need to do now, the only solution is to exercise. You can learn to do whatever you want with enough exercise.

There is good and bad news here. The good news is, no matter how long your training takes, several months, years, or your whole life, the process itself is already the result … When you train in something, you are no longer in the same place (not in the same ass) as you were before.

The bad news is that this is the only way to get what you want: fit, produce, and train to produce.

Think how long it took to create everything that you use every day, how much labor it took. What do you bring to society in return? This is how you can assess your importance to society.

Your inner world matters only insofar as it forces you to do this or that

There are so many people who consider themselves to be real artists. They say that they are artists, they introduce themselves as artists, and in their hearts they are probably also artists and no one else.

But, in fact, in their entire life they painted, perhaps, two or three pictures, which they never showed to anyone except their relatives.

And who will perceive them as artists? If yes, then not for long.

This is to say that, whoever you are in the shower, until it comes out, consider that it does not exist … At least for society.

Your inner world, experiences and emotions, thoughts and intentions are very important, because your actions, in fact, your whole life, grow out of it. But until your thoughts turn into actions, nobody cares about them.

If you watch a program where they talk about the number of sick and homeless children, and you just feel sorry for them, you think that this is enough. That thoughts are the same as actions. But until you have done anything other than compassion in your thoughts, you will not be considered a kind, sympathetic person.

And here is a great saying from Jesus:

Any tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.

Well said.

Everything inside (and outside) you will get in the way of improvement

A person has many protective mechanisms of the psyche that keep him from changing, since any changes require effort, possibly associated with stress and break the usual, comfortable existence.

Just as a smoker reacts aggressively to any attempts to force him to quit, or at least to persuade him to do so, so a person stuck in his comfort zone is aggressively disposed to any criticism of his life.

“Who are you to criticize me? I also found a home-grown guru,”and stuff like that.

Suffering is easiest, but happiness requires effort and courage.… It is easier to consume without creating anything, because then no one can destroy what you have created. This fear leaves many people on the margins of life.

If you create something, a person will be able to condemn it, laugh at you and your efforts, and if you do not create anything, you are pure and can yourself scoff at other people's failures.

People from their familiar surroundings also often get in the way of achieving something. If you decide to quit drinking, you will be persuaded to drink, if you decide to go in for fitness, fat friends will talk about the harm to health and the pointlessness of losing weight.

This means that in order to become a tree that bears some kind of fruit, and does not dig into the humus under the roots, you need the courage to start and responsibility for what happens in the end.

So start now. Choose what you want to produce, whatever it is: learn to dance, paint a picture or write an article, cook a delicious dinner, lose 10 kg, it doesn't matter.

Just start making, training and producing … Remember the good news about achievement and training? You become better already in the process, when you are just training to produce something, to give something to this world and society.

Maybe very soon you will be able to name 5-10-100 of your real achievements without hesitation.