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2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44
Leo Babauta talks about the changes in our lives. How can we make sure they don't lead us off course?
It often happens that, trying to change some of our habits, we quickly lose interest in this due to circumstances beyond our control.
Let's say you're on a diet and your daughter has some great cupcakes. Of course, you want to support her and eat a couple. Having made yourself a favor once, you quit what you started and on the same day eat something else harmful, the same thing is repeated the next day …
Another example: you are trying to think only good things. And here you are, go out of your way to be nice to someone from whom you are not happy, and he is rude to you. In such conditions, somehow it is impossible to think positively.
So how can you stay on course?
Solution
You just need to expand the boundaries without enclosing the transformation in strict frameworks.
The point is that the process of change seems to us to be ideal. We believe that if we have already started a diet, then not a single deviation will follow and we will immediately become healthy and beautiful.
Naturally, it will not work not to fill the cones. And seeing that not everything goes smoothly, we get upset and go astray.
But the problem is not that some circumstance prevented the fulfillment of our plans, but that we imagine everything too smoothly. We keep in our head a certain unviable ideal.
So what do you do?
Instead of diving into your own fantasies, think about how things really happen in life. Be prepared for anything and show interest in new events.
Is there someone who has a different attitude towards you than you expected? This is normal, because you know that reality is far from ideal, and instead of getting upset, you focus on why it happened and how to properly respond to this deviation from the course.
Letting go of dreams of the ideal, you can relax, smile and think: “So what? What will be my reaction?"
Expanding the boundaries, you help yourself to better understand everything that is happening and move dexterously, bypassing all the bumps in life.
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