How to completely change yourself and become better than you are in 12 months

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

This article is for those who want structural changes in their lives, who have time to work on themselves and achieve their most important tasks. This is a 12 month program and will require a lot of effort and time to implement.

At one fine moment in my life, I realized that something was missing in me: you seem to live, but something is not right and wrong. I looked at myself from the side and in the mirror, went through one strong training on my own, read a couple of educational books. I made disappointing conclusions that I have a bouquet of bad habits, I hardly devote time to my health, I am not popular with girls, my level of disorganization is off the charts, and besides, I often go away from solving difficult life problems.

After realizing this fact, something in me switched and pulled me forward: of course, not immediately, but the movement towards the goal began - to become better than I am. I picked up this feeling and worked on myself for 12 months. Now I can say with confidence that the algorithm below works, and I would like to share it with the readers of Lifehacker.

It doesn't matter how many days are in your life, it is important how much life is in your days!

Sport

It all starts with sports and its implementation in your life. We start with basic exercises, but you need to do them every day. These are simple exercises: squats, abdominals, push-ups. It all starts with a repetition of 5 times and every day increases by 1 time, you can perform two runs a day. After a month, you will squat 35 times, do abdominal exercises 35 times, and push up 35 times. Then you can increase the number of repetitions as needed, but be sure to do it every day.

Each person needs to find his own sport, and you should not follow the lead of fashion: everyone runs, which means running, everyone does yoga, which means yoga. Look for your sport, which will completely suit you: loads, interest, time, financial component, people. It should become an extension of your essence.

For a year I have tried yoga, gym, boxing, running, swimming, jujitsu, aikido, cycling. At the same time, he was engaged in several types for several months. It was a great time, because it was an unconditional benefit for my health, and I also understood more and more what exactly I want from sports.

My choice fell on Jiu-Jitsu and swimming is the basis of my sports development. Now this is for life, because the pleasure that I get in the classroom is difficult to express in words, and my success in this field only reinforces this conviction.

Books

You will have to read and read a lot. An excellent result is 40-50 books per year. I have read 42 books and I understand that 50 books a year is real. The main thing is to read without stopping. And, of course, don't watch TV and stay on social networks.

Read only to develop your mind: psychology, Russian and foreign classics, self-development, finance - no boulevard or entertaining books.

Summarize the essence of what you read, what impressed or disliked the book, memorize the quotes. So you train your memory and you can always surprise your interlocutors with clever sayings from books.

Ayn Rand's book "Atlas Shrugged" was very influential for me with its fundamental nature and strong dialogues, as well as situations similar to events from my life.

My moral, the moral of reason, is contained in one axiom: reality exists in one choice - to live. Everything else flows from here. To live, a person must consider three things as the highest and decisive values: Reason, Purpose, Self-esteem. Reason as the only instrument of cognition, Purpose as the choice of happiness, which this instrument must achieve, Self-esteem as an indestructible confidence that he is able to think and his personality is worthy of happiness, which means worthy of life. These three values require all the virtues of a person, and all of his virtues are associated with the relationship of existence and consciousness: rationality, independence, purity, honesty, justice, efficiency, pride.

Ayn Rand "Atlas Shrugged"

Discipline

What distinguishes a strong personality from an ordinary person is discipline. Regardless of your mood, motivation, external circumstances, family relations, do what is necessary at a given moment in time.

Learn to swim against the tide of life's circumstances, educate yourself so that the inner state does not depend on what is happening around. It was very difficult and it didn’t work out right away, as there were breakdowns. But I walked forward again and again with the support of loved ones and an inner desire to go this way at all costs.

Where can you start? From the morning ritual. Here is the simplest and most effective method for honing discipline: when the alarm rings, you get up right away, wash your face, turn on the music, do exercises with strength exercises, then a contrast shower, a healthy breakfast (no fried and sweet) and reading a book (you can go to the office) …

This should be done until it turns out to be done automatically and without forcing oneself. It took me 3 months, sometimes, of course, there were crashes, especially after overloaded days. I recommend that anyone who wants to change their lifestyle develop their own morning ritual.

You need to learn to control yourself: your speech, gait, gaze and gestures. Wherever you are, at home, at work, in the gym, you must exude confidence and act without fuss. Remember the principle of feedback: even if you don't feel that way, this feeling of confidence and discipline will come.

A very useful exercise for developing inner strength - despite all your natural fears, do not look away from the interlocutor, from people passing by who are looking into your eyes. I will not deny that martial arts classes helped me with this. But it is also good to look with a warm gaze, showing that you are in a benevolent mood.

To educate myself, I learned to deny myself pleasures: bars, alcohol, sweets, cigarettes, impulsive purchases, idleness, empty talk at work. This may not work out right away, but we need to think about it all the time, work in this direction. And one day I said to myself: "Yes, I have not drunk alcohol for three months and have not eaten sweets for two months."

I attended sports classes or courses despite my mood, circumstances, weather and my motivation. I made a schedule and followed it, threw away all my favorite excuses. I liked to come to the hall when something stopped others and when there were like-minded people who were ready to support me in these endeavors.

And most importantly, you need to learn to control yourself when little is obtained, and a mess is going on around. Be an island of calmness and cold endurance.

Finance

Start a financial journal. Lead him for a month, the second, the third and do not stop. And do not just lead it, but analyze every month what and where goes, why and how to fix it.

I spent a lot on coffee - 1,300 rubles a month. I realized that it was time to reduce its amount, and now the level of spending on coffee is 600 rubles a month. Coffee is my weakness that I don't want to get rid of.

Many people say that the magazine is a useless thing: "I already know how much I spend and earn." And you try to conduct it for 1 year with accurate analysis and charts and you will see the whole picture of your financial literacy or illiteracy.

Keep yourself in financial asceticism, stop buying what you don't need or is imposed by advertisements and acquaintances. Most of our purchases are useless and not useful in life, and you can easily do without them.

Find additional income, even if it is small, but it will motivate you to even greater achievements. Let it be an increased workload, additional work (of any format), freelancing, selling unnecessary things, teaching other people. The mistake of the majority - everyone wants a lot of money in the initial stages, but this does not happen. You don't earn a lot at work right away, so in life everything is gradual.

Relationship

This point applies more to men who have not found their soul mate or even do not want it, which I was. If you are alone and have a lot of time, develop your dating skills. Sign up on dating sites, meet in cafes and on the street, chat in the gym, ask friends about girls you know.

Try different communication strategies: gentleman, macho, shy, athletic guy. Meet girls smarter than you, admit it, conquer them.

In various situations, not everything will work out: the wrong words, the wrong method, not your person, failures in bed. But don't stop, it should temper you.

And over time, you will learn to understand the opposite sex, learn to easily start a conversation, make beautiful compliments. Girls will often reciprocate, they will feel an interesting personality in you. But do not be overconfident, look for someone who will appreciate your qualities "uncut," and be loyal and loyal to her.

If it's simple - love, suffer, conquer, disperse and start anew. Become someone with whom you want to spend time, with whom you will be comfortable in any situations, be able to understand and listen to another person. And remember that your significant other can always leave you, so enjoy every moment together.

Skills

Start developing skills you didn't have before, such as breaststroke, typing, contextual planning, emergency driving. Master them, find a mentor on the topic, take training. Such achievements develop personality, make it multifaceted.

You will also learn to deliberately step out of your comfort zone and overcome fear, which will later become your driving force. All great achievements begin with small victories over oneself.

Over the past 12 months, I have been doing things that I have never done before: heavy strength exercises, meditation, training with children, conducting trainings, asceticism.

Spirituality

Define your values in life, create for yourself internal and social rules, find your “I”.

Finally, find the answer to the eternal question: “Why am I here? What is my mission?"

How? Ask yourself important questions, do not look at other people who are drifting like a boat in the ocean, become a reference point both for yourself and for others. Read spiritual books, visit spiritual places and, finally, create your own picture of the world order. This is very important, so you will become unshakable and you will have your own faith. Not the one that is shown in the media, but its own internal one.

Most people are afraid to ask themselves difficult questions and close themselves with materialism, as I did in my time, but this is a dead-end branch of development. Things and everyday bustle cannot be closed, they will not give you the happiness that you will feel when you find something important inside that will lead you further.

Good habits

As you break bad habits and change structurally, you will need other habits - and better for them to be beneficial.

For example, if you talk a lot, learn to be silent and listen to the interlocutor, even when your tongue itches already - be silent.

If you eat a lot of sweets, replace it with nuts or dried fruits, do not eat so much chocolate and cookies, washed down with sweet tea.

Books are great savers from TV and Internet addiction. It's just that the brain will no longer want to "liquefy".

If you have nothing planned and everything happens just like that, get a notebook, write down all your tasks for the day, week, month. Write down thoughts that come to you, fresh ideas, describe events and people. Keep records and analysis of your life.

If you smoke, quit and immediately jump into sports, preferably in the one where the lungs work the most in order to expel all the tar out of yourself.

Algorithm for structural change of oneself in 12 months

• Sports load every day. For a long time, decide on your sport, do it, no matter what, for a whole year.
• Read a lot of books, 3-4 per month. Write a summary of what you read.
• Develop discipline. Deny yourself pleasure. Remain calm when the storm is around. Try to deny yourself something every month.
• Develop financial literacy. Keep a financial journal and find additional income throughout the year.
• If you are single - look for your soul mate and develop the skill of seduction. If you are not alone, fall in love again with your chosen one.
• Learn new skills you never knew before. Desirable - 1 skill in 2 months.
• Find the answer for what you are here, even an approximate one - it will already be good. Spend as much time on this as you see fit.
• Get good habits instead of bad ones. This is an everyday job.

Victory over oneself is true success in life.

It is difficult to change, but possible. The main thing is to want to set yourself interesting (and not so) goals and achieve them, no matter what. Everything will not work out right away, there will be misfires, breakdowns, but the motion vector must be maintained, and you will definitely break through the barrier of your weakness.

If you think that this requires motivation or money, you are wrong: you only need one pure desire to become better than you are, and time, which is so short in our life. But remember, there is no limit to perfection, this is constant work on yourself, and it continues until the end of your days. A developed personality lives much happier than those who are weak in front of themselves and retreat before life's circumstances.