6 myths that prevent us from setting goals and achieving them

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Get rid of them to make it easier to move forward.

1. Goals cannot be changed

It seems that he has set a goal and that's it, then all that remains is to go towards it. Even if circumstances and priorities have changed. Or, in the process, it became clear that in its original form the goal was unattainable in principle. Die, but get it. Or admit that you're just a failure and didn't try hard enough.

Actually

Goals should be flexible. The conditions of your life are changing, and you are changing, your views and desires. What was relevant on December 31, can lose its attractiveness in a couple of months. Or you may suddenly realize that you got excited and pump up muscles in a year, like Mister Universe, and at the same time, you still won't be able to learn Spanish perfectly. So you can safely change the wording, terms, conditions.

Or just cross out an irrelevant goal and forget about it. Yes, yes, that is also possible.

There is an opinion that goals are not so important at all, and instead of them it is better to prescribe intentions or attitudes. For example, not “get a new job,” but “prepare well for the interview and try to stay calm”.

2. Only long-term goals matter

We really like to think big: if we set a goal, then immediately for five years. Or at least a year. Indeed, in such a period of time, in almost any business, you can come to impressive results - there will be something to present to yourself and those around you. But small goals - for a month or even more so for a week - this is so, self-indulgence, not even worth wasting time.

Actually

Long-term goals are, of course, important. Only for a long period of time can one become a specialist, save up for an apartment or learn several foreign languages. Therefore, be sure to set and write down such goals if you see fit.

But keep in mind that by the time you get to the desired result, you may lose interest and motivation.

Therefore, remember to break down ambitious goals into many small milestones. This will make it easier for you to deal with them. For example, some consultants advise you to imagine that your year lasts not 12 months, but a maximum of 3. And, accordingly, set goals for 90 days, and after that time, take stock and start a new three-month period.

3. Goals should be recorded on Sunday. Or December 31st

We usually think about goals in a moment of excitement. For example, when the new year looms ahead and we believe that on January 1, we can start from scratch and change our lives. Or when the weekend comes to an end, we had time to rest a little and decided that it was time to do self-improvement. And it seems quite logical and correct.

Actually

Somewhere in our hearts, we are sure that there is some magic on Mondays or January 1 - something that will help us and bring the result closer. In addition, these dates give the event a solemnity and importance. But this approach has significant drawbacks.

First, when choosing a certain day, we seem to be waiting for the perfect moment. Which, as you know, does not exist.

And secondly, the pre-New Year festive excitement or Sunday relaxation can make us biased. At such moments, there is a high risk of inadequately assessing your desires and capabilities and setting goals that will then be impossible to achieve. Or ones that you don't really strive for.

Therefore, it is best to write down goals on the most ordinary weekday, when you are not too tired, and your thoughts are not clouded with dreams, pipe fantasies and New Year's bustle.

4. Goals are always about action

In a world obsessed with achievement, only actions and results are worthwhile. We strive to lose weight, earn more, travel around a certain number of countries, master a certain set of skills. At the same time, we hardly think about our feelings. And we certainly don't take them into account when we set goals.

Actually

It is unlikely that you strive for achievement for the sake of achievement: behind each goal, in the end, there are feelings. We want to achieve something in order to feel satisfaction, joy, peace of mind, or love.

For example, you strive for higher earnings because you want to relax and enjoy more often. Or you need to be calm about your future. Or … whichever option you put in, it probably touches on emotions and sensations. But at the same time, for some reason we focus only on visible, measurable results.

Try to figure out what kind of positive emotions you are missing, and concentrate on them.

You can redefine your goals and make them more emotionally focused. For example, not “lose weight”, but “learn to eat slowly, thoughtfully and enjoy every bite”; not "to start playing sports", but "to find activity that will bring me joy." You will achieve these goals faster and with great pleasure. At the same time, tangible results will also necessarily add to positive emotions.

5. Writing down goals will make it easier to achieve

You have probably heard this statement more than once. The allegedly fixed intentions become more serious and material. As if we are signing some kind of tacit agreement with the universe and are more likely to fulfill our promises.

Actually

Research says that setting goals does increase your chances of success. But not by itself, but in conjunction with active actions and regular reports on progress. So the goals, of course, would be nice to write down. But that doesn't guarantee anything.

6. Goals should be set according to the S. M. A. R. T

This is the most famous goal setting technique. Its name is an acronym that stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Timely. That is, goals should be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time-bound.

This formula, derived back in 1981, is described in books and articles, and it is this formula that is most often recommended by various coaches, consultants and experts. And if so, then it will definitely work for you.

Actually

Formula S. M. A. R. T. and the truth has proven to be effective. But besides it, there are other goal setting systems. For example, the extended version is S. M. A. R. T. E. R., which takes into account that the goal should be enjoyable (E - enjoyable) and reward (R - rewarding). Or the BHAG system - according to it, you need to set big, daring and ambitious goals. The kind that can be scaled up to the scale of a global mission. Kind of like "Connect the World" like Facebook. Or “Make the colonization of Mars possible,” like SPACE-X.

If these options don't work for you, you can come up with your own system - one that works for you. Be mindful of yourself and don't try to blindly follow the rules.