Psychological life hack: how to convince a person that he is wrong

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Do not rush to shower the interlocutor with arguments. Better to start with something else.

First, note where the person is right, and then state your point of view. This approach was proposed by the famous mathematician and philosopher Blaise Pascal. To convince someone, he advised to look at the case from the side of the opponent, express disagreement and let him change his mind.

Here is what he writes in his book "Thoughts": "If you want to argue not in vain and to convince the interlocutor, first of all, understand for yourself which side he approaches the subject of the dispute, for he usually sees this side correctly, then admit him that he is right and right there show that when approached from the other side, rightness immediately turns into wrong. Your interlocutor will willingly agree with you, because he did not make any mistake, he just did not see something."

People when they are told they are wrong. The remark seems to them to be a personal attack on them, a criticism of their character and intelligence. After that, there is almost no chance of cooperation. Therefore, first mention what the other person is right about. And then point out the sides of the problem that he did not notice. Provide him with information that will lead him to his own awareness of the wrong. This way you will avoid quarrels.

The arguments that a person thought of himself usually seem to him much more convincing than those that came to the mind of others.

Blaise Pascal mathematician and philosopher

Psychology professor at the University of Texas Arthur Markman explained how to use Pascal's advice in practice.

“In order for the interlocutor to change his mind, first of all, you need to turn off his defensive reaction,” says Markman. - If you immediately tell a person what he is wrong about, he will not have an incentive to cooperate with you. First, agree with his correct conclusions, confirm their importance. Now he wants to cooperate with you. This will give you a chance to express your concerns about the issue under discussion."