3 Essential Skills No One Told You About

Don't take it personally

The sense of responsibility has one side effect that is completely destructive to the individual. The brain, in an attempt to control what is happening around, wants to take everything at its own expense.

The car cut just you.
A new law from afar to make it harder for you to live.
The active growth of the company has brought you a raise in your salary.

We tend to regard everything that happens as something that concerns ourselves directly.

But not everything that happens to you applies specifically to you.

This truth is difficult to accept and even harder to remember every day. After all, we depend on how our brains and bodies work. We feel good when something good happens. If something ruins the mood, then we will definitely take it to heart.

It's great to think that good things are happening to you because you are such a cool person. It is very convenient and easy. Do you know why you can't think so? Because this train of thought will destroy you to the core.

If something bad happens to you, does that mean that you are a terrible person? If your wallet has been stolen or your phone crashed, is it worth sprinkling ashes on your head?

This type of thinking is like a swing: every day you experience ups and downs, trying to interpret every little thing.

The feeling that you deserve something is very dangerous. Such a concept simply should not exist in your vocabulary. This is an emotional vampire, a black hole that sucks in all the emotions, energy and love around you. It may sound a little dramatic, but you get the point.

When people criticize you, it is more about themselves than about you. They express their vision, their priorities, proceed from their life principles. In fact, most people don't think as much of you as you imagine.

If you don't succeed, you do not become a failure. You become a person who sometimes fails. If there is a trouble, you feel hurt, know that this pain is not about you. It's just a natural and integral part of life.

Learn to change your point of view

In schools and universities, we are taught to defend our point of view, write convincing texts, and develop public speaking skills. However, no one has ever talked about how important it is to learn to accept another person's point of view. What if your convictions will destroy you?

It's hard to believe in it. After all, we spend so much time and effort to develop our position in life. Therefore, we are so actively opposed to those who violently attack our foundations and try to persuade us.

Take your fingers out of your ears and stop singing silly songs loudly. Look around. You are often wrong, you need to understand this. You will be wrong very often. Almost every day. Why, every hour you will be wrong. It would be nice to develop a skill so that you can see your mistakes and correct them.

How to do it?

There is no secret. You need to constantly work on yourself. Evaluate your behavior, ask: “What if I'm wrong? What to do in this case?"

It will be very difficult at first. The brain and body will resist. Only through overcoming will you be able to train and develop the skill you need.

Try this: Write down 20 things you did today. Ask yourself, “Why did I do this? What made me make such a decision? Perhaps it was one of the inner convictions:

I am ugly / ugly.
I am lazy / lazy.
I don't know how to speak to a person.
I will never be happy.
I think the apocalypse will come next Tuesday.

The more feelings you put into such beliefs, the more important it is to overcome them. After all, it is these inner foundations that prevent you from making the right decisions every day.

Now imagine that such beliefs no longer exist. You are very beautiful, not lazy at all, you will soon be happy, and the horsemen of the Apocalypse stopped for a snack. Would you do the same today as you did yesterday? Or changed your mind?

It will be scary at first. Some decisions you will not even discuss with yourself. You don't want to know what you really believe. You will refuse to change yourself. But it is vital for you to develop a skill that will help you see your mistakes and accept a different point of view. Work on yourself.

Learn to work without an idea of the end result

It's good to work when you know how it will end. I wrote an essay at school because the teacher told you, passed it, got a grade. No surprises. At work, you work quietly and get paid. Very comfortably.

But in life, everything is different. There is no certainty about the future, or about every decision. If you want to change careers, no one will whisper in your ear: "Now you will be happy." You have to be afraid, worry and worry.

Therefore, we do not really like to make fateful decisions. We try not to move, speak or act if we are not sure of a favorable outcome of affairs. Many of us ask the question: "How do I know that I am doing the right thing?" No way. Nobody knows what is good and bad for you.

If you are trying to learn how to predict the outcome of your actions, you are in trouble. Because you can't live like that. Some actions need to be done simply because they need to be done. This is how the world works, there is nothing to be done.

Add some chaos to your life. So, to stimulate changes in yourself, to awaken passion, to feel the taste for life.

These three skills are well worth learning. Just don't turn everything into a competition. Try to change a little for the better. Life is not an endless race to survive.