8 false attitudes that keep you in an unhappy relationship

1. A person must have a pair

When we are alone, it seems to us that everyone is walking around in twos, like lovebirds. That all families, children, weddings, joint trips and cute photos on Instagram. And in general, a person after a certain age is supposed to be in a relationship, this is as important an attribute as education and work, for example. And if you are alone, then something is definitely wrong with you.

79% of Russians surveyed believe that marriage is needed just so as not to be left alone. 60% are sure that getting married is worth having children. In other words, people still enter into alliances simply because it is so, and remain in a relationship "for show."

2. Everyone will know that I am a loser

To break off a relationship means to show that you did not succeed here. Many perceive such a step as an admission of failure and even their own inferiority.

The modern world has taught us that we should always be joyful, successful and happy.

So, you need to smile, portray happiness in every possible way and post joyful photos in which you, holding hands, jump into the azure sea or feed each other with strawberries. Even if the soul is very hard.

3. I will be sorry

After a break, tactless questions will inevitably fall on a person from all sides, some will begin to look at him with sympathy. At every family feast they will sigh, ask why he is alone again and when to wait for the wedding and grandchildren.

This is actually an ordeal. And many people prefer to maintain a relationship that does not bring anything but disappointment, just not to endure all these pitiful looks and questions.

This is also confirmed by statistics. According to a VTsIOM poll, 10% of Russians are kept from divorce by condemnation of friends and relatives.

4. Nothing terrible happens, everyone lives like this

It seems to many that very serious reasons are needed for a breakup: betrayal, domestic violence, alcoholism of one of the partners, poverty, some deep differences in mentality.

And if nothing terrible happens, there is no need to think about leaving your partner. Even if there is a quarrel at home after a day, there has been no warmth in the relationship for a long time (or maybe there hasn't been) and both feel unhappy.

This is how everyone lives: the neighbors from above, and their own parents, and even star couples.

Well, they swear, they hate each other - but it's a matter of everyday life. You can be patient.

5. There are no happy relationships at all

That is, there are, but only on the pages of books or on the screens of cinemas. Behind any "happily ever after" is a harsh life, quarrels, misunderstandings, betrayal and other troubles. Those who say that everything is fine and harmonious with them are simply lying.

This means that there is no point in breaking up an unsuccessful marriage: I will either end up in the same way, or I will search all my life for a mythical happy relationship that does not really exist.

6. We've been together for so long

And it's not even about jointly acquired apartments, cars and other material benefits, but about the fact that people often feel sorry for common memories, impressions, happy moments, local stories and jokes. It seems that if you break off the relationship, all the good that was between them will automatically depreciate. And what if earlier it was good, but now it has become bad, then you need to endure for the sake of this common happy past.

But this is absolutely not the case. Bright moments will not go anywhere either from photo albums or from your memory. But dislike, scandals, abuse and betrayal can destroy any joyful memories.

7. Getting used to a new person is difficult

“We have already got used to each other, we know each other well. If we disperse, I will have to look for someone else and get used to it again. And this is difficult. Indeed, the older we get, the more difficult it is for us to make new acquaintances, to get closer to an unfamiliar person, to let him into our life, to accept and love him with all his advantages and disadvantages.

But by staying in an unhappy relationship, we risk not only good mood and self-confidence, but also health - mental and physical.

Research shows that troubled relationships are associated with depression, anxiety, insomnia, and an even higher risk of heart disease. And this is much worse than being alone for a while or rubbing against a new partner.

8. Breaking up is long and difficult

8% of Russians are kept in marriage only by the difficulty of divorce. It seems that this is a monstrous bureaucratic procedure: you need to go through the authorities, collect papers, explain something to strangers and indifferent people. And even if the marriage was not concluded officially, it may not be so easy to break it either: it will be necessary, for example, to transport things, look for new housing, divide property, cats, and possibly children. No, it’s better to let everything remain as it is.

But if this is really the only reason, it is easier to find an apartment, transport things and talk to officials from the registry office than to make yourself and your partner unhappy for many years.