8 beliefs that make you unhappy

1. Everyone should like you
2. You must be competent in everything
3. It's terrible when things don't go the way you want them to
4. If there is a danger, you should be concerned about it
5. Your past defines you
6. People and things should be different
7. You can be happy doing nothing
8. It is easier to avoid responsibility and difficulties than to accept them

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

You don't have to develop positive thinking to feel better. It is enough to learn to recognize and control imprecise and irrational thoughts.

1. Everyone should like you

No, actually. This attitude was relevant in prehistoric times, when human life depended on relations with fellow tribesmen and on being in a tribe. But since then we have had a lot of new options.

When I started publishing articles on the Internet, I was preparing for haters, expecting the worst. But that did not happen. Yes, someone didn't like my lyrics. But I needed to find people who share certain interests, and I found them. If I tried to please everyone, my posts would be so empty and deceitful that no one would be hooked.

8. It is easier to avoid responsibility and difficulties than to accept them

I realized that this belief was false when I was 20. I had a toothache, but I was afraid to pull it out. Finally I went to the dentist and it didn't hurt as much as I thought. In addition, the problem disappeared once and for all. Since then, I have known that it is easier to cope with difficulties than to try to avoid them.

Another example is related to parenting. The first years are difficult. But I believe that the more you invest in this time, the easier it will be further. You have to do a lot of work when the children are still young, but when they grow up, they will be more independent and self-confident. By accepting responsibility, you make life easier for yourself in the future.

Realizing all these irrational thoughts is already a huge step. The next time you catch yourself on them, just mark it. Consider if they help you achieve your goals. Let them calm down. So your mind will gradually move towards something more natural, more healthy beliefs.