How to make friends with fear

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Fear is the ghost of your consciousness. It is not always material, it is not always really dangerous. But sometimes you squeak at the sight of a huge dog on a leash and even in a muzzle, and then you dream of this dog for three nights in a row, it appears outside the door and in a dark alley. You can continue to do demonstrations, or you can become stronger and … make friends with this animal.

How fear is perceived by society

Fear is an emotion inherent in absolutely every person. If you are suddenly attacked by this beast, do not consider yourself a hopeless coward. Believe me, even the most successful people sitting in big chairs are often preoccupied with the same problem. They, of course, turn to psychologists for help, and they, in turn, provide it, receiving tidy sums for primitive actions.

Love is what you were born with, and fear is what you learned here.

Marianne Williamson American writer

Have you caught yourself thinking that it is sometimes difficult to cross the line and share worries with friends or family? It is natural. Suddenly they will laugh and twirl a finger at the temple: they say, you are already an adult. If you are faced with such a problem, then the following simple recommendations will come in handy.

I'm afraid to look down

We will consider a case of normal brain response to altitude, not pathology. With a pathological fear - acrophobia - everything is much more complicated. Until the situation becomes neglected, colossal work on oneself is needed. Do not rush to medications, try to make friends with your fear on your own. What if it turns out to be not so creepy?

1. Identify the trigger for fear of heights

Write in your notebook what exactly makes you afraid, whether it's the view from the tenth floor window or traveling by plane. When you realize how much you missed by feeding your fear, you are most likely motivating yourself to continue working.

2. Consider if you are in danger of physical harm

Believe me, you won't fall out of the Ferris wheel if you just grab the handrails with your hands. The maximum that threatens you is a cold. The wheel makes more than a hundred laps a day, it is designed for heavy loads.

3. Relax

It is not for nothing that adherents of Buddhism preach harmony. Harmony begins with you, it cannot be found on the side. Take a breath, calm your thoughts, understand: in fact, there is no cause for concern. Everything outside of you does not concern you. Try yoga and meditation. They are great for unloading the brain and relaxing the body.

4. Gradually tame fear

After going through all the steps and deciding not to brake yourself with a phobia, you can come face to face with height. Do not force yourself, do not start by walking alone on a skyscraper. If it is impossible to overcome the anxiety, the situation will simply get out of control. Take a walk with a friend or girlfriend on a high mountain, breathe in the fresh air. You yourself will be surprised when you realize how much you have lost due to irrational fear.

Monster under the bed

You turn off the light, run from the lamp to the bed with the speed of the wind and quickly jump under the covers: otherwise the monster will have time to grab the heel! Not only children, but also many adults have a fear of the dark. Often this is due to the imagination, which is activated closer to night.

1. Try to get out of the habit of the light

If you still don't turn off your night light while you sleep, it's time to quit. Firstly, even dim light makes it difficult to get enough sleep and be ready for a new day. Secondly, it saves electricity quite well!:)

2. Prepare to rest in the dark during the day

Think, even talk to yourself that you have to plunge headlong into the abode of Fear itself in the evening. By the way, you can even record audio with a relaxation program and listen to it from time to time.

3. Fight fear

And now you are already in bed, and the thoughts of the monster still do not go away … First, lower your legs, then straighten up and stand up. Take a breath and look under the bed. And if you see a monster, call the Ghostbusters.

4. Change the very idea of darkness

If you have completed the day's preparation and can now rest without light, try writing down on paper what you think about your fear of the dark. Maybe you will call her the fluffy black beast that guards your sleep? What does your imagination tell you!

Everyone will look at me, there are so many of them

For some, the fear of public speaking arises in childhood, when it is necessary to read a verse in kindergarten, and then at school. Often, after a stressful experience, a head hurts, a heart often beats, and sometimes you can faint. The problem is that we don't speak too often, or at least once every two days, so we are simply not used to the attention of the audience. But both businessmen and politicians have problems with this. Watch the movie "The King's Speech!"

1. Exercise in front of a mirror

Experiment with facial expressions, gestures, see what is right for you. Try to remember and apply this later. But such trainings should not be one-off.

2. Come up with toasts

Even if you do not drink alcohol, then one way or another you get out for gatherings with friends. Prepare at least one beautiful, competent toast for each meeting, which is not limited to wishes of happiness and health. Volunteer to toast yourself, not under duress. It's always easier, check it out!

3. Prepare to speak

Ideally, the text of the speech should be composed by you: then you will know exactly what to say, even if you get lost with what was written. Before choosing a topic, you need to surf the Internet, find evidence, facts, analyze them in order to be able to refute any remark from the outside, and not with an indistinct hum, but with a confident clear voice.

Make a short outline for yourself, according to which you will build your presentation. In front of the mirror, you can try to tell the text several times, referring only to the outline. And one more thing: there is nothing shameful in memorizing! Remember how you memorized the multiplication table.

Pay attention to your appearance. It will help you feel your best.

4. Be prepared for criticism

You must understand: all people are entitled to their opinion. Yes, no one says that you need to accept and agree with him, but tolerance is an integral part of success. Prepare yourself for listeners to express criticism, discontent, cynical and skeptical phrases. Be higher, learn not to let the negativity through you. Let him pass by, and you stay the same cool.:)

Say no to suffering

Here are just the most common phobias. However, advice on how to make friends with fears can be safely transformed for yourself, for your fear of spiders or water …

Now that you have visual instructions on hand, go for it! You can defeat any dragon and achieve your goal without giving up any goodies.