8 tips to help you negotiate effectively

Our whole life is a series of negotiations. It doesn't matter what we do: buy a car or choose where to study, hire new employees or decide which movie to watch in the evening. Any life situation becomes a reason for negotiations. Our ability to negotiate is inextricably linked to our ability to make decisions. And this is the foundation of a successful life.

1. Learn to listen

The ability to listen to the interlocutor is often underestimated. But it is thanks to him that you can learn a lot about the goals, desires and fears of a person.

During the next negotiations, do not try to come up with your own answer while your interlocutor is speaking, but listen carefully to him. Pay attention not only to words, but also to intonation, gestures and facial expressions.

2. Develop emotional intelligence

We usually make decisions based on our fears, selfishness, or greed. Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize your own feelings and the feelings of those around you. During negotiations, he will help you to curb your emotions and rationally approach the problem, as well as manage the feelings of others.

Approach feelings intelligently. When negotiating, try to be collected and stay calm, even if everyone else is nervous and losing their temper.

Remember, negotiation is a constructive dialogue between two parties seeking an agreement. Anger and irritation are signs of weakness and unprofessionalism. Attacks on the other side will only lead to the fact that your interlocutor will close and begin to defend himself. And your emotions will be used against you.

3. Strive for Mutual Benefit

Help people get what they want and you will get what you want yourself.

For example, a car dealer needs to sell a certain number of cars and pay bills. And you want to buy a car profitably. When negotiating, think not only about the price you are willing to pay, but also try to help the seller. As a result, everyone will benefit.

4. Be curious

This is another overlooked skill. Don't be afraid to ask questions, let the other side talk. This way you have less chance of screwing up yourself.

We usually find it inconvenient to ask a lot of questions, but this is a very important part of effective negotiation. Try to show curiosity and genuine interest in people next time. For example, ask the following questions:

Why is this important to you?
Could you explain what you mean?
How do you feel about …?

5. Speak clearly

It is very important to know what and how to say. Therefore, collect your thoughts before you start speaking. Don't talk too fast, you're not Eminem. Speaking clearly and without haste will give you the impression of a confident person.

In addition, try to get rid of parasitic words and phrases "Honestly", "Sorry to ask, but …", "I'm sorry, but …", "Unfortunately".

6. Pause

Use pauses to focus on a particular sentence or question.

This strategy also works when someone tries to force you into a trade that is not beneficial to you. So give your answer and pause. The situation can get very awkward, but try not to lose your composure. Don't show that you are worried.

For example, Ramit Sethi, a personal finance specialist, advises responding to an HR manager's disadvantageous offer in this way: “I am grateful for this offer. I understand that each employee is viewed as an investment for the company and that you decide how much to invest in a particular employee. Therefore, taking into account my experience and the contribution that I can make to the development of the company, I am forced to ask for a raise. I am confident that I can fully recoup your investment in me, so I believe I deserve a higher salary. What can you do for this?"

Then pause. Now the other side has to make the decision.

7. Prepare in advance

Preparation is the main rule of effective negotiation. Find out as much as possible about the negotiators, then you will be ready for all unexpected turns of events.

Also prepare a plan that will benefit both parties. It doesn't hurt to have a plan B ahead of time in case the first one doesn't work.

8. Don't be intimidated

We quite often experience anxiety in front of people with high status, while forgetting that they have their own fears and problems.

It doesn't matter which side the advantage is on. Never let the other side push you around and impose their terms on you, no matter how influential the interlocutor may be. If you are confident and can prove your worth, you can always opt out of the deal.

conclusions

Learning how to effectively negotiate is not that difficult. You need to understand people: their aspirations, fears and motives. When you understand the other side, you are halfway to your dream deal.