How to survive in school: tips for schoolchildren and their parents

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Learn how to communicate with teachers, fend off school bullies, and deal with poor grades.

How to deal with bad grades

Bad grades do not mean that the child is incapable of mastering basic knowledge and will post ads until retirement. They are just a formality. More often than not, unexpected Cs and Cs indicate other problems. Perhaps the child quickly grasps everything and in the classroom, instead of listening to the teacher, goes about his business. It also happens that estimates are artificially underestimated. In this case, parents should take action: go to school, talk with the teacher and, if necessary, with the director.

Evgenia Vorobyova General Director of the MalyshMaPy family club, psychologist.

It is important not to scold the kid for poor grades, but to try with him to figure out what he is having difficulties with. Perhaps the teacher does not adequately explain the subject, or the child simply does not have a soul for him.

How to communicate with a teacher who dislikes you

The reasons for disliking can vary, but remember, the teacher is also human. With all the desire to observe professional ethics, he may have favorites and "dislikes". Perhaps the teacher treats the child badly, because his discipline and level of knowledge are lame. In this case, you will have to take up the textbooks. If the teacher is too picky, then the parents must solve the problem. Remember that children who get along with their parents rarely get into conflict with other adults.

Help your child prepare perfectly for the lesson the "harmful" teacher teaches, and perhaps the situation will change radically. This is usually the case.

Evgenia Vorobyova General Director of the family club "MalyshMaPy", psychologist.

How to fight back (and whether it is necessary)

Paying school bullies with the same coin is a bad strategy. Having received a couple of bumps and bruises in a fight, the child risks losing the remnants of authority in the eyes of his classmates. A multi-informant longitudinal study on the relationship between aggression, peer victimization, and dating status in adolescence shows that love of fighting reduces the popularity of boys among girls, and vice versa. Poaching and revenge is also a bad idea. You can teach ill-wishers a lesson only in a peaceful way. For example, by improving your academic performance.

It is important for the child to make it clear that authority in school is deserved not by kicks and jerks, but by the level of knowledge. The bullies' nagging and taunts are easy to ignore. It is important to acquire like-minded people - those who seek to gain as much useful knowledge and skills as possible.

Evgenia Vorobyova General Director of the family club "MalyshMaPy", psychologist.

What to do if a child is bullied by classmates

School bullying can have long-term consequences for everyone involved. Studies of Adult Psychiatric Outcomes of Bullying and Being Bullied by Peers in Childhood and Adolescence show that victims and initiators of school bullying, reaching 19-26 years of age, are more likely to suffer from depression, anxiety disorder, dissocial personality disorder, take drugs and even try to commit suicide …

Parents and teachers should understand the situation at the first sign of bullying. If everything is left to chance, the whole class can take up arms against the child and he will have to be transferred to another school.

If no one has noticed for a long time that the child is in a state of stress, does not succeed in subjects and avoids classmates, there will be no sense in class meetings and further negotiations with students and their parents. The child will remain an outcast among his peers.

Evgenia Vorobyova General Director of the family club "MalyshMaPy", psychologist.

How to help a shy child prove himself

Shy children find Shy Children in the Classroom: From Research to Educational Practice physically unattractive, have difficulty making friends, have low self-esteem and high levels of anxiety. In addition, they seem to be less intelligent and less capable than talkative children, Perceptions of intelligence in leaderless groups: The dynamic effects of shyness and acquaintance.

To overcome shyness in a child, scientists advise Helping young children overcome shyness to talk more often about the benefits of communication, encourage any attempts to enter into a conversation, introduce new people and teach them how to describe their emotions.

What to do if your child is annoyed by school and classmates

First, find out what is irritating. If your child is not interested in the classroom, it's time to look for a new school. If the reason for this is conflicts with classmates or teachers, go and sort it out. If there are no obvious reasons for dislike, take the child to a psychologist.

Parents should control the situation: for some time, see off and meet the child from school, observe how he communicates with peers, talk with teachers. If there are no obvious reasons for dislike of classmates, it is worth visiting a child psychologist.

Evgenia Vorobyova General Director of the family club "MalyshMaPy", psychologist.

How to teach a child to resolve any conflicts

One way is to master a set of flexible skills. Unlike most of the skills children learn in class, flexible skills are not specialized. They are required everywhere and help to solve many professional and life tasks. Here are the main ones:

• Communication skills. This includes the ability to communicate and listen to others, the ability to behave appropriately to the situation, manage conflicts and maintain relationships.
• Systems thinking. It includes the ability to settle conflicts, think critically and make decisions, the ability to collect information from various sources and find the best option.
• Self-control. This is the ability to control impulses and emotions, distinguish them, direct attention, and behave with dignity in any situation.
• Motivation. This includes the ability to motivate yourself, to understand how the motivation of different people differs.
• Resilience and psychological adaptation. It is the ability to adapt to any situation, to cope with stress and life's troubles.

These skills can be developed with the help of specialized literature and training.

Varvara Chuikova Executive Director of the Future Leaders Foundation.

The child needs to be helped to acquire skills that will be useful both in school for solving problems with classmates or teachers, and in life. It is worth paying more attention to developing flexible skills than trying to mechanically insert a textbook into the child's head.

Learning flexible skills will not only help you survive in school, but also succeed after graduation. Studies on Social and emotional skills in childhood and their long-term effects on adult life show that children with advanced communication skills and emotional intelligence were more likely to take well-paid jobs.