Who are ghost people and why do they disappear from your life without explanation

But then he suddenly disappears from the radar. No meetings, no calls, no SMS. The "disappeared" also does not react to your attempts to contact him: there are beeps in the receiver, messages remain unread. It seems that the person has disappeared or something bad has happened to him. But no. He just turned into a "ghost" and started visiting you.

Who are ghost people

Despite the mysticism in the word "ghosting", there is nothing paranormal in such disappearances. All these people continue to live their lives, they simply delete their acquaintances from it, without explaining anything. In other words, ghosting can also be called ignorance or avoidance.

Ghost in English is a ghost, and the person who "visits" you becomes invisible, like a ghost. The word appeared in dictionaries in the early 2000s, but became popular in English-language media and social networks after 2015: unexpectedly, journalists and bloggers began to use it very actively. Perhaps this new term is chosen in order to look at the situation with humor and reduce the degree of seriousness and tragedy of what is happening. “He's visiting me” does not sound as sad as “he avoids me”.

According to the study, at least 25% of those surveyed had at least once become a victim of ghosting, and 21% themselves turned into ghosts and ignored romantic partners or friends. By the way, yes, you can visit not only a passion, but also a friend or even colleagues and companions. However, the seriousness and depth of the relationship is important here.

Perhaps you will even be told the reasons - and you can cry, eat, drink or dance your sadness.

And when a friend or a person you like disappears without explanation, he leaves you in limbo, ridiculous, incomprehensible and even humiliating. You don't understand what happened, you can't figure out the reasons and you absolutely don't know what to do: wait patiently for the "ghost" to return, try to find him and find out what the matter is, or come to terms with the end of the relationship. It’s easy to unstuck, lose confidence, and drown in anxiety and guilt.

What to do if you are avoided

This is a very frustrating experience. Here's what psychologists advise to do.

1. Understand that you are not guilty of anything

When a person visits you, this does not mean that something is wrong with you. On the contrary, it means that your "ghost" has problems that he needs to sort out. And you are not responsible for the actions of another person. Unless, of course, you have abused him or her, humiliated him or used physical or emotional violence.

2. Accept the relationship is over

Even so ridiculous. If a person wanted to meet or be friends with you, he would not be hiding. And since he is hiding, it means that he broke up with you, he is simply afraid to say about it. Try to do what you would have done if the gap went by all the rules. Burn a joint photo, throw away gifts, cry to friends or diary pages, listen to sad music.

3. Burn the bridges

Try to completely eliminate the "ghost" from your life. Delete his number, block him on social networks, erase photos and videos. In a word, do everything to remember him less. At least for the first time.

4. Move on

Don't let these experiences undermine your self-confidence. Live your normal life and don't be afraid to seek friendship or romance.

What if the "ghost" is you

According to the statistics mentioned above, at least a quarter of the respondents have visited someone at least once. So if you periodically disappear from someone's life without explanation, you are not alone. But that doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. You yourself probably feel guilty and understand that you are hurting other people.

Unfortunately, there is no easy way to deal with this. You will have to figure out why you avoid people and are afraid of conflict. And then work through your problems with a psychotherapist.