9 phrases that infuriate work communication

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Any thought can be conveyed more correctly.

This article is part of the "" project. In it we talk about relationships with ourselves and others. If the topic is close to you, share your story or opinion in the comments. Will wait!

1. This is no good! Redo everything

Nobody likes harsh, categorical criticism. First, it is frustrating: the person did something, but his work was not appreciated at all. Secondly, it makes it angry: the speaker does not at all try to choose expressions to sweeten the pill, does not conduct an adequate dialogue, accuses - and, possibly, unfairly. Thirdly, it is confusing: it is completely incomprehensible what to do now and how to cope with the task. If you abuse this behavior, you can lose a good subordinate or colleague.

At work, there is nowhere without criticism, but it is better to do them politely and calmly, in the form of feedback. That is, find something to praise a person for, then point out the points that should be corrected, and, finally, offer at least a couple of ideas on how to do it better.

Which is better: “I love that you made the visual for the posts so quickly. But it seems that the picture looks noisy and too colorful. Let's try changing the font and removing some of the elements?"

2. Oh, I forgot

Work is no longer a school, and a colleague or boss is not a teacher who stands above his heart and demands to hand over homework. When everyone is working on common goals and objectives, it is assumed that the responsibilities and requests will be treated responsibly by people. So childish excuses can be pretty annoying. Especially if a person too often uses all sorts of "forgot", "did not have time", "overslept" and does not even apologize for his behavior.

Of course, the human factor has not been canceled: everyone's alarm clocks sometimes break or there are misses. But it is better to make sure that this happens less often, and still do not forget to ask for forgiveness and offer to somehow compensate for your mistake.

Which is better: "Excuse me please. I know you asked me, but I just flew out of my head. I will now postpone everything and take on this task. Well, I'll explain everything to the client myself."

3. I got a little sick, but decided to come anyway

There are two types of people: someone, feeling unwell, takes sick leave, and someone heroically goes to the office, coughing loudly, sniffing and throwing pills into themselves. These two camps are completely irreconcilable, and the reasons why people choose the second option can be enumerated for a long time. And some of them are really quite respectful: the manager does not let him go on sick leave, money is really needed, a person works part-time or under a GPC agreement. But be that as it may, the sick person harms others, and not only at work, but also in public transport on the way to the office.

Which is better: stay at home and be treated. Or work remotely.

4. Be a friend, replace me tomorrow

Few people want to take on other people's business, work an extra day, and rearrange their schedules. If you have to outsource some of your tasks to a colleague or ask him to switch shifts, you should apologize for this. And at the same time explain the reasons for what happened and offer something in return. Well, it is best to warn in advance and, in general, try to allocate time more competently so that this does not happen again.

Which is better: “Could you take over for me next Thursday? My son has a matinee in kindergarten, he really wants me to come. I will work for you on any convenient day. And, of course, I have a chocolate bar."

5. Yeah, then I'll do it

This also includes different variations on the theme "call later", "I am not ready to answer yet", "most likely, it will be ready in two or three weeks." If you give a person a task or ask him for something, you want to be sure that he will fulfill it. And not sometime later, but in the foreseeable future. Therefore, vague promises and the lack of clear deadlines can be unnerving: it seems that the person is not taking the matter seriously. So it’s better to immediately indicate when the work will be done.

Which is better: “The task is clear. I need a week for this, next Tuesday I will send you a ready-made layout."

6. Do you remember Luda from the second floor? So, she …

There is nothing terrible about gossip. And the one who says that he is not a bit of a gossip is almost certainly lying to himself and to those around him. The desire to wash someone's bones is a part of our nature and an element of socialization, there is no getting away from it.

But before you gossip, it is better to make sure that the person you are talking to is on the same wavelength and that your conversations do not harm the object of gossip. For example, you don’t disclose any personal information, you don’t hurt your reputation, you don’t denigrate a person in the eyes of others. It's very good if you are not discussing a common acquaintance, but someone distant - a celebrity, a cousin, a former spouse.

7. Of course, nobody needs anything

And also “You could have guessed it yourself”, “Do whatever you want”, “Yes, yes, I just love to work overtime” and so on in the same spirit. All such phrases are manifestations of passive aggression. This is a kind of manipulation, when a person does not speak directly about his feelings and claims, but packs them in a socially acceptable wrapper so that others feel guilty and rush to fix everything.

Passive aggression is not only words, but also gestures: rolling eyes, clicking, grinning. This tactic is really only good for one thing: to ruin relationships with other people. But to change a situation that does not suit you, it will not help. So it's better to be direct about anything you don't like and suggest options on how to fix it. Of course, in the correct form (see point 1).

Which is better: “Yesterday I asked you to offer options for a corporate party, but so far no one has sent anything. I would like to see more activity from you. It’s difficult for me to make a decision alone, and this applies to all of us.”

8. Colleagues, urgently

Usually, nothing good follows this beginning. It means that you have to give up all the current tasks, work overtime and get everything done in a hurry.

In addition, any urgency is mainly related to the fact that someone missed deadlines or was not able to properly organize the work. From this, as well as from other force majeure, no one is insured. But nevertheless, we need to try to mitigate the situation so that people are not so offended to cover up other people's shoals and work in an emergency mode.

Which is better: “Forgive me, please, that I have to distract you, but we had a force majeure and we really need your help. Then I'll order pizza for everyone, I promise."

9. Deal with it yourself. This is your job

Indistinct tasks are, firstly, unpleasant, and secondly, a guarantee of an indistinct result. If the manager, colleague or client refuses to answer clarifying questions, does not give the necessary information and in a sharp form sends them to sort it out on their own, it is quite logical to get angry. Of course, provided that finding the right materials is not part of the task.

So it would be nice to spend a little time and clarify the problem. Or correctly indicate to a colleague that he should show independence.

Which is better: “Yes, there are many questions on this project. Can you write to the client and figure it out?"