Life hack for foreigners: how to behave in a Russian feast

Today we came across an old and very funny, but no less useful guide for Americans who first came to a Russian feast. The advice set out in it is equally applicable not only to foreign citizens, but also to our compatriots, who, by the will of fate, find themselves in a situation where they have to "abuse".

I don't think the Russians' abilities with regard to vodka can be explained by their particular biology. This is due to their traditions. Many Russians believe that foreigners cannot drink - they drink and do not eat. They mix cocktails. They do not drink vodka in one gulp, but sip a little at a time. It is possible that this is due to the high cost of alcohol and the innate greed of foreigners. The Russians, on the other hand, drink as much as they can fit in - while remaining alive. Here are the basic principles of drinking vodka for the uninitiated:

One hour before the party (options)

Eat a couple of boiled potatoes
Drink one or two raw eggs
Drink one or two tablespoons of vegetable oil

This will ensure you stay sober even if you drink a bottle of vodka. It is not joke. Raw eggs are the most potent method.

During the party

If you start drinking vodka, drink only vodka. No beer or wine. No juices. And especially: no soda water.
We do not “siphon off” vodka, but drink it in one “gulp”.
Have a snack immediately after the "volley". It is very important to neutralize alcohol. This is best done if the food is salty or sour. It can be pickled tomatoes, cucumbers, sauerkraut, caviar on bread and butter, herring - you can with boiled cold potatoes and onions or boiled beets and mayonnaise, sprats or sardines. If this is not the case, you can have a snack with a traditional Russian salad, they call it "Olivier" (this mixes all the food that is in the house, boiled eggs are added and everything is poured with a thick layer of mayonnaise). Ukrainians love to eat smoked bacon with garlic, but this appetizer is for professionals.
Only the first three glasses of vodka are required. This will show people that you are an outgoing and friendly person. You can skip the next one or two glasses. To do this, you just need to say: "Ya propuskayu". This does not mean that you will not have to drink any more. This means that you, as a "weak" foreigner, are given the opportunity to gain new strength for the party.

"Ya propuskayu"

In Russia, it is customary for everyone to drink at the same time - before that, some kind of toast is made. Everyone drinks at one table, on which there are glasses of vodka and a snack (zakuskis). The person who says the toast usually pours vodka into everyone's glasses himself. Taking a bottle in your own hands, pouring it into your own glass and drinking it yourself is a very big tactlessness. If you yourself want to say a toast - special books are sold in stores - there are a lot of options for all occasions.

"Zakuskis"

Snacks (zakuskis) are eaten during only the first hour of the party (during this time you will drink approximately 200 g of vodka - 4 glasses). After that, you will be served hot (goryacheye) - and you must eat it, even if you do not want to eat anymore. Only in this way can you not get drunk.
Engage actively in intelligent table conversations to keep your head up and running. You will not be completely sober, but not at all drunk.
At the end of the party, you will be served tea and cake. Don't skip this meal. In this way, you show the hosts that you are quite sober and appreciate their hospitality without any dire consequences.

So, within four to five hours you drank a whole bottle of vodka (500 g) - and you are not only alive, you are almost sober.

After party

Leave a small bottle of beer in the refrigerator overnight. Get up at about five in the morning and drink it, then go to bed. This will save you from your morning hangover.
If that doesn't work, although it's usually enough, drink a glass of water and salt, Russians drink pickle from canned salted vegetables.

Some Russians advise drinking a small glass of vodka in the morning to relieve hangovers - don't do that: this is only suitable for alcoholics.