2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44
Being the best is the only worthy purpose and way of being. This is what people who are called perfectionists think. Development and excellent results. This is wonderful! And it is strange that such a character trait interferes with life for someone. Elizabeth Lombardo will teach you how to be happy if you are a perfectionist.
The world of the perfectionist is divided into two parts by a bold horizontal line that runs somewhere over the head. Everything above is perfect. Anything below is disgusting. What position do you think the perfectionist has in his eyes? If you answered “Above the Line,” then you understand nothing about the pathological pursuit of perfection.
But Elizabeth Lombardo understands, because she herself is used to living according to the principle of "all or nothing", but at some point she realized that in large doses such an approach only leads to nervous disorders and depression, and not at all to the ideal.
While the goal of the perfectionist is to be happy with oneself, it actually has the opposite effect. Why? Because the inner critic constantly judges you, saying, "You are not good enough." Or even worse.
What could be better than perfection? Only happiness. Imagine, these concepts are not equal to each other. It is impossible to achieve perfection, but to develop the habit of being happy is quite. If you follow the recommendations from the book "Better Perfection", then you will definitely succeed.
Who Needs This Book
Perfectionists, of course. The book opens with definitions and concepts that will help you figure out if it's worth reading further. The second chapter is a test for perfectionism. Honestly, I failed to become an absolute idealist. But 98 points out of 120 - the result, according to the author, is already worthy of work on yourself.
And the book is also useful for people who live next to eternal excellent students, because it helps to understand their behavior and suggest a way out.
Why read it
The main advantage of the book is that it contains almost no vague recommendations from the series "love yourself" or "stop being nervous." For people who are really troubled by perfectionism, this advice sounds like "try not to breathe." Thoughts are correct, but how can they be realized?
With the help of step-by-step instructions from the author of the Better Perfection program. To test what Elizabeth Lombardo is talking about, you will have to make lists and practice record-keeping exercises.
The exercises are interesting and fun, and they also help you understand the mistakes you make in trying to be the best in the world. Each is accompanied by a very detailed example based on a case from the author's practice, so that it is clear how to correctly follow the instructions.
Perfectionism: pros and cons
The book gives an opportunity to look at life from a different angle. She does not force me to give up everything and think about the beautiful, does not discourage me from being better. It only teaches you to perceive yourself and your actions correctly, even if they do not reach perfection.
As a true perfectionist, I could not recommend this book to read if I was not sure of its effectiveness. And as a classic representative of the army of people who are always dissatisfied with themselves, I could not rely only on my own opinion. Therefore, I went along with the book to a professional psychotherapist with a request to comment on the methods and techniques that the author uses. The expert confirmed: this is how specialists work, and the exercises are suitable for home use.
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