No excuses: "Life is the best teacher" - an interview with businessman Alexei Talay

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

He is called the Russian Nick Vuychich. They are really similar. It's not about missing limbs. There is something in common in the look, smile, and most importantly, outlook on life. At the age of 16, Alexei lost his legs and arms, but did not lose courage and nobility. Today he is a successful businessman and respected philanthropist. Read about how Alexey went this way in this interview.

Echo of war

- Hello, Anastasia!

- I am from the city of Orsha in the Republic of Belarus. Our family is exemplary: father, mother and younger brother. We lived together. My father worked on the railway, and my mother was an accountant.

- In our area during the war there were fierce battles, there was a warehouse with ammunition. Many years have passed, and people are still finding artifacts of those bitter times. My grandfather, a veteran of the Great Patriotic War, always warned my brother and me how dangerous such finds are. In general, he talked a lot about the war: how his comrades died, how people starved …

I was 16 years old, I studied at the railway technical school. On the eve of Victory Day, I came to my grandfather - to visit, to help with the housework. Not far from our site, children gathered: they collected and fired gunpowder. Remembering the precepts of my grandfather, I always drove them.

On that day, May 8, I once again drove these outrages away and began to put out the fire. And at that moment, as I later realized, there was an explosion.

I woke up 3-4 meters from the fireplace. I didn't understand at all what happened. He opened his eyes and started to get up. He tried to lean on his hands, and they seemed to fall through somewhere. I raised them to my face and saw a terrible sight … I tried to get to my feet, but raised my head and saw that my legs were also torn above the knee.

Realizing that there was nothing I could do, I just lay down and looked at the sky. It was beautiful: deep blue, without a single cloud. I was fully conscious.

- The sound of the explosion soon came running grandfather and grandmother. The panic began.

It was unbearable to see the eyes of beloved old people. Grandfather returned from the war without a scratch, but its echo overtook him many years later. At that moment, the physical pain was not so excruciating for me - it was harder to see the grief of my grandparents.

But it was this that subsequently gave strength for treatment and rehabilitation.

I couldn't give up. I thought: my grandfather had endured all the horrors of the war, so I will do it too.

The example of the grandfather and the upbringing of the parents did their job. Now I know for sure: the fundamental principles of the psyche are laid by the family in childhood.

- Yes. First resuscitation, then boxing for the dying (gas gangrene began). The doctors told the parents that they could not survive with such injuries. Miraculously, I lasted 12 days. Then a professor at the Minsk military hospital, Nikolai Alekseevich Abramov, found out about me. He came to Orsha and under his own responsibility undertook to treat me. At first, many hours of operations were performed every day, then every other day.

Barrier-free America

- Yes, in Germany they gave me a stroller with an electric drive. It changed my life, opened up freedom of movement.

I went to the States at the invitation of the famous business speaker Bob Harris. He learned my story and invited me to see how their social and charitable organizations work. We traveled with him to almost 30 states. Wonderful memories remain.

- First of all, the available infrastructure. Our barrier-free environment is associated with wheelchair ramps. For them, this concept covers the interests of all people with limited mobility. Infrastructure tends to be flat: flat floor and road, no rapids and curbs. It is convenient for the elderly, who can no longer raise their legs high, and for mothers with strollers.

This is also starting to develop here. The nineties, when everyone survived as best he could, fortunately, behind. But progress is slow. And the problem is not in the state. Businessmen, building new buildings, often simply do not think that they themselves may end up in a wheelchair, that they will grow old, or that their wives with their children will go to this store. Everyone wants to make it easier and cheaper. But if there is an opportunity, you need to do it conscientiously. And if there are even more opportunities, help in other areas.

“Traveling around America, I ended up at the Vail ski resort. For me, just looking at skiers and snowboarders was already a pleasure. But Bob said: "Now we will go upstairs and you will take a ride in a special chair." At first I was surprised, then frightened: from above, the town where we were, seemed very tiny. I began to deny, and Bob said: “You are Russian! Let's!". It hurt me, bit my lip - come what may. As a result, I rolled it three times - this is an unimaginable sensation!

In our countries, people with disabilities often lack just such feelings. Only a few can go in for sports, rehabilitate themselves through it. We need business support to open sections, purchase equipment, and so on.

- It is different, but this is not because the people there are special. Everything is again connected with a barrier-free environment. The disabled are active there, they work, are engaged in public affairs, the world is available to them.

With us, if a person is in a difficult situation, he is written off. Society does not see any prospects in him, they say, now he is a burden, he must sit at home and grieve. And the person actually becomes like that. He suddenly sees how many steps and other, intangible, barriers are around. It can break.

Gift - new life

- At first I was on the support of the state and was not particularly worried about how to provide for myself. He was more involved in rehabilitation. But at the age of 19, I realized that, in spite of everything, I was interesting to the beautiful half of humanity, and I thought: if we start a family, how will I feed it? Living on my wife's salary or asking for money from my parents was (and still is) unacceptable for me.

I decided to start my own business. He was engaged in many things: from fixed-route taxi to trade. In the end I built a small beautiful building, which I now rent out.

- Enough. When I was collecting papers for construction, sometimes I read on their faces: “Why does he need this? It won't work anyway. But mostly I came across sympathetic people who helped with advice and deed.

There were also purely everyday difficulties: I needed to go to a meeting, but there was no one to take. I had to make a hundred calls to solve the "problem". You could spit on everything and delegate your powers to someone. But it was important for me to do everything myself.

But now I can say with responsibility: I have achieved everything that I have myself.

- I would answer "at the behest of my heart", but I'm afraid it will sound too pretentious.:)

I have already said that everything is laid down in childhood. When I was seven or eight years old, I accidentally saw a man with amputated legs. He was sitting near the entrance on a wooden plank with wheels. It amazed me. I thought about him for a long time, imagined how he lives. I felt very sorry for him. After that, I always asked my parents to give alms if we met a disadvantaged person.

But I really thought about help when I was on rehabilitation in Germany. There were children with cancer - they came for operations.

I became very good friends with one boy. He was a real prankster: he jumped into my carriage and chased me. After the operation, he again came to the playroom - bald, with a huge scar on his head. He heard the noise of my carriage, stretched out his arms forward and said: "Lyosha, Lyosha, where are you?" I realized that although his eyes were open, he could not see anything. I could hardly hold back my tears …

After that, I firmly decided that I would help the children.

- The reactions are different. Someone freaks out: “What am I to you, Rothschild or what ?!”. Others light up, but enthusiasm quickly dies out.

Mainly those who help themselves have experienced some serious situation. They understand that we are not separate individuals - we are a society. Giving happiness to someone, you become happy yourself.

I am not saying that everyone should help. But if you have a little more than you need, then why not?

- There is. 95% of people think so, and have the right to do so. But if the desire to help is really sincere, then you need not be lazy, spend a few days studying this or that organization. How transparent is its reporting, do they really help or are they just renting offices and paying themselves a salary? Read reviews about them, check out the guide.

Alternatively, you can provide targeted assistance. Sometimes it completely changes a person's life.

- A good example is Yana Karpovich. She was 15 years old when we gave her an electric stroller. Before that, she sat at home, occasionally went out into the street, when her mother could take her out after work. The electric wheelchair gave her freedom. I was incredibly happy when I saw Yanochka walking around the city, happy, independent. And what was my surprise when after a short time she called and said: “Uncle Lyosha, I'm looking for a job! I want to help my mother. She began to track vacancies on the Internet, as a result, she got a job in a call center, she goes to work every day. I am sure that this girl has a wonderful future.

So sometimes a stroller isn't just a gift. This is a new life.

Russian Nick

- They are.:) In America I was even confused with him. They smiled, approached, asked to be photographed. I could not understand, did I really become so popular after a couple of interviews? But then I was told that they have a guy who was born without arms and legs and who is very popular in the States. I looked on the Internet - indeed, we are somewhat similar.

As for the speeches, I tried myself as a speaker in America. It's common there. Once he spoke to an audience of about 200 people at a meeting of representatives of all the chambers of commerce in Texas.

I also perform at home from time to time. I recently gave a speech at a large Belarusian company. But I am far from Nick: he does this professionally, and I have many other things to do.

- Yes.:) Mark is eleven, Vlad is nine, and Dasha is three. I am insanely proud of them and grateful to fate that I have them.

- That's right. I entered the Belarusian State University at the Faculty of History. I want to show the children that anyone can enter a prestigious university and study successfully, so that they don't have a reason to play around: “Dad, I'm tired, I can't do it”.

- It seems to me that a child should have a choice: study at home, study in a regular or specialized class. But in general I am in favor of integration. If we are not talking about mental problems, when an adaptive educational program is required, then it is better that all children study together. This will help a child with disabilities to socialize, and children without a disability - to become more tolerant and kinder.

Parents and educators will need to think about how to explain that all people are different and that if a boy or girl is physically different from you, this does not mean that he or she is better or worse.

At least I try to teach this to my children.

- Kindness, courage. I want them to perceive reality correctly and strive for the best.

An illustrative case was when we once collected gifts for orphans. The whole room was littered with things. When Mark and Vlad saw this "feast", they asked: "And to whom is this all?" I replied that the children who grow up without mom and dad, and I understood from the eyes of my sons: they were imbued. We didn't ask for a single toy, not a single chocolate bar.

- So that loved ones are healthy and happy. And also to build a house, create a cozy family nest where children will grow up.

- Appreciate what you have. Especially family and friends. You may be haunted by lack of money, failure, betrayal. But, if this happens in your life, it must be passed with dignity. Any distance has a finish. Sooner or later you will tear the tape and a new section will begin. The main thing is to move forward and calmly accept the tests. Together with them comes invaluable experience.

Never get hung up or whine! All difficulties are temporary, and life is the best teacher. She will certainly lead you to happiness.

- Thanks for the invitation!