An unconventional approach to creating good habits: guide the rider, motivate the elephant, and shape the path

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

If you really want to get rid of bad habits, you have to consider all the obstacles that can prevent you on this path. Lifehacker shares a curious way to create and follow good habits.

Analogs of how we think and create habits

Psychologists say that our brain has two systems of thought - rational and emotional.

In the book The Happiness Hypotheses by Jonathan Haidt, these two systems are presented in the form of a horseman riding an elephant. The rider is our rational part that makes plans and solves problems. The prefrontal cortex of the brain is responsible for it. The rider decides where we want to go.

The elephant is an analogy for the parts of the brain responsible for the formation of emotions - the tonsils. These are our strong, unpredictable and irrational emotions. But an elephant can provide us with the energy we need to travel.

The Writer Brothers Chip and Dan Heath have explored this model in greater detail in their book Heart of Change. How to achieve change easily and for a long time”and added a third component - the path followed by the elephant and the rider. It symbolizes the environment.

The rider, the elephant and the path

Taking all these components into account, the overall picture looks something like this:

You've probably already guessed what the main snag is. If a huge elephant does not agree with the rider on where to go, guess who will have the final say?

The rider may try to convince the elephant of his desires, hit or push, but this is a huge elephant who wants to decide for himself where to go.

This is why it is so difficult for us to get used to new habits. Intellectually, we understand what will be better when we get rid of bad habits. But one rational approach is useless if the emotional side does not agree with you.

The second problem has to do with the road. If the rider and the elephant are about to reach their desired destination, they should not be distracted by anything else along the way. Therefore, you have to clear the road.

Let's consider all the components of this model separately.

Rider

The rider may seem small compared to the elephant, but he is damn good at planning a route - if he has a good map at hand.

Most people give the rider very vague instructions. If you want your rider to guide the elephant effectively, you need to be clear about your goals. Therefore, statements like “I’ll do the exercise sometime next week,” “I’ll call my mom when the opportunity presents itself,” or “I’ll start eating right soon” will not help you succeed.

The rider needs specific and measurable goals:

• "I will be doing exercises on Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 6 pm in the gym."
• "I'll call my mom from home on Saturday after breakfast."
• "I will eat vegetables every day for dinner this week."

In other words, you need to draw a big bold red cross on the exact spot on the map where your rider should lead the elephant.

To accomplish this, use two effective strategies - good old-fashioned planning and tying intention to habit. For example, in the phrase “If I want to lie on the couch, then I read a book,” “if” is an intention, and “then” is a habit that needs to be implemented.

Elephant

The elephant doesn't care about rational planning. He does what he feels. This means that you need to give the elephant enough motivation to take the rider in the right direction.

Here are some strategies to help you motivate your elephant:

• Start with something small. Let your elephant feel superior and confident in his abilities. Then he will begin to move in small steps in the right direction.
• Celebrate small victories. Every time your elephant walks in the right direction, give him a reward immediately.
• Create immediate consequences. If your elephant refuses to move, use a stick - self-restraint.
• Report back. Work with a coach or friend. The elephant will be more motivated if someone is watching him.
• Track your progress. Get your elephant into the habit of checking your progress. For example, count the days that you are in the habit.

Way

The path symbolizes the physical environment where the habit takes place. To make the journey of the elephant and the rider run smoothly, there are two important steps you need to take.

1. Make the desired path as easy as possible

Ask yourself how you can change your environment so that it doesn't cost you any effort to follow the habit. This is necessary for the elephant to follow the desired default path.

For example, if you want to read more books, make sure there is always a thick, interesting book on the couch in your living room.

2. Make the unwanted path as difficult as possible

The elephant may be tempted to veer off course and take an alternative route. Especially if there is something there that gives instant pleasure. To avoid this, make the alternative roads as unattractive as possible.

If your elephant prefers to watch TV rather than read a book, put the remote in the next room. If an unwanted path is inconvenient, your elephant is more likely to stay on the right path.

3 important takeaways for sticking to good habits

1. The rider is the rational part of your mind that plans the journey. He needs specific and measurable goals to control the elephant. This can be done through planning or implementation.
2. The elephant represents the emotional part of your mind and provides the energy for the ride. To go in the right direction, he must be motivated. To achieve this, take small steps toward your goal, celebrate victories (albeit small ones), tie intention to habit, take responsibility for your actions, and track progress.
3. The path represents your environment. To travel effortlessly, the rider and the elephant must move easily along the desired path, but hardly move along the unwanted path.

Improve your plan. Motivate the elephant. Remove all obstacles from the path. And then start moving. Anytime you feel stuck, repeat or refine these steps until your rider and elephant reach their goal.