S.U.M.O. - a special technique for achieving success in life

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Many view books to increase motivation with skepticism, but the circulation of literature on self-development testifies to the continuing interest of readers in this topic. Konstantin Smygin, the founder of the business book service in brief, shares with the readers of Lifehacker the key ideas from the recently published book-motivator “S. U. M. O. Shut up and do it! Paul McGee.

The good thing about this book is that it combines classic ideas on how to get better into an extremely simple and memorable system, which increases the chances of using them in everyday life.

Of course, for those who are familiar with the ideas of books on self-development, S. U. M. O. will not open up new horizons. Nevertheless, it is quite capable of helping to restore the lost desire to act to those who have lost their fighting spirit.

What is S. U. M. O.?

This is not about the Japanese national struggle. S. U. M. O. is an abbreviation for Shut Up. Move On, invented by Paul McGee. It can be translated as "shut up and do". These words express the essence of the actions that are necessary to achieve success and feel happy. It is necessary to "shut up" - to stop, look at your life from the outside and listen to your thoughts and feelings. And do what needs to be done.

Despite what you had in the past, you can make the future different. The bottom line is not to become limp, not to feel sorry for yourself, not to procrastinate. Just shut up and change your life.

The author of the book, Paul McGee, is a psychologist by training, a popular British lecturer, and also works as a coach responsible for improving the effectiveness of players in Manchester City, one of the leading clubs in the English football Premier League.

What S. U. M. O. differences from other systems of efficiency and motivation increase?

There are no revolutionary discoveries in the book. All ideas have been familiar for a long time, but usually people are in no hurry to use them. The big plus of Paul McGee's book is that everything is laid out on the shelves in it, which makes it easier to put ideas into practice.

Despite the fact that the rhythm of life is changing and technologies are developing, ideas about self-development will always be relevant, because the desire for success and happiness is inherent in human nature.

Paul McGee identifies 7 factors that are critical to success.

1. Reflections. We live in a frantic rhythm, and from time to time we need to pause to analyze our life and think about what we are doing right and what is not.
2. Recreation. Constant changes in life and constant availability do not give us a break. Many complain of mental fatigue and insomnia. Rest is not a bonus, but a necessity.
3. A responsibility. The world doesn't owe us anything. For our happiness and well-being, only we ourselves are responsible.
4. Persistence. There are ups and downs in life. The main thing is how you react to them.
5. Relationship. The quality of life depends on harmonious relationships not only in personal life, but also at work. Relationships are the foundation of life and need to be improved.
6. Ingenuity. Many people spend too much time and energy thinking about what they lack and what they want, instead of focusing on what is available. See yourself not as a victim, but as someone who can concentrate and develop new skills to cope with life's challenges.
7. Reality. Perceive reality as it is, not as you want it to be.

The author recalls an idea that has already been said and written a lot, but which is still relevant: we pay too much attention to events, while they do not at all determine what awaits us in the future.

What determines the future?

Not events, but our reaction to them, determines the consequences. Different people react to the same event in different ways, respectively, and the consequences for them will be different. One reaction can cause stress and escalate conflict, while the other will lead to positive results.

But the reaction also has reasons. What influences the reaction?

First of all, habits: we look at the world through filters and often do not know about it. Most people love simple solutions. Our brains form certain neural pathways to respond automatically in order to conserve resources. We can say that our habits are recorded in our brain.

We understand that we need to do differently, we plan to change, but this does not go beyond empty promises. To change your habits, you need to make serious efforts to see the big benefits in it.

But it is not necessary to become a slave to habits, especially those that interfere with life: procrastination, irritability, lateness. You can blaze new neural pathways and replace old bad habits with new positive ones. You need to understand that this will require serious efforts, that intentions alone are not enough.

What else influences the reaction?

Conditioned reflexes. Often people react as automatically as Pavlov's dogs. Many people live as in a dream and do not think about their behavior and how to change it. But by controlling your behavior, you can change your life for the better. If we are unhappy with life, we need to change our attitudes from negative to positive.

In addition to reflexes, emotions affect the reaction. We often regret what we do and say under the influence of emotion. But we justify ourselves by the fact that we had no other choice. In critical situations, it is worth reminding ourselves that we ourselves choose how to perceive events and how to react to them.

From the outside, we always know better what to do. And we advise friends and family on what to do and how to do it. But it’s easy to be objective when it’s not about us personally. The more we are emotionally involved in a situation, the harder it is to think intelligently. Emotions get in the way of making the right decision.

We see the world not as it is, but as we are. Anaïs Nin writer

So what do you do?

The book does not offer any unique way to change yourself. Apparently, simply because the only correct way is to do what the majority already knows about. Build healthy habits. Understand that it is not the situation, but the reaction that influences the consequences. Understand that there is always a choice, and not to act automatically. Stop being a slave to your emotions.

Where to begin?

First of all, you need to pause, turn off the autopilot and honestly evaluate your life.

Ask yourself questions:

1. Who has made the biggest impact on your life?
2. Who is responsible for the fact that you find yourself in such a life situation?
3. Whose advice do you most listen to?

Ideally, the answers should be like this: "I", "I", "to your own." But few people take full responsibility for their lives. Many are accustomed to playing a game called “Blame Someone else” and feel like a victim. They think this way: life is unfair, I am not to blame, I am not talented, I cannot influence the situation, how many opportunities have been missed, others are to blame for everything.

Victims are those who believe that they have no choice, who have low self-esteem, who do it out of habit to absolve themselves of responsibility. And some just like to feel like a victim, because that way they are more sympathetic and paid more attention.

How to stop feeling like a victim?

This is often difficult because the position of the victim has certain advantages. It is very convenient not to admit your responsibility and to blame the circumstances and other people for everything. This is destructive behavior that will not lead to anything good. The challenge is to learn to think differently, even though it will be uncomfortable at first.

But what if a person really became a victim of some terrible events? He's not responsible for them, is he?

Helpful advice from Paul McGee: even if you become a victim of some terrible events, you need to turn from a victim to a survivor. In any case, the same is true here: you need to take responsibility for reacting to events, learn to make different choices and act differently.

But that doesn't mean you have to come to terms with being treated unfairly. You may be a real victim, but see yourself as someone who wants to move on and not dwell on the past.

What exactly do you need to do to stop feeling like a victim?

The key is to tune in to a proactive approach. Instead of complaining about the injustice of life and looking for the guilty ones, concentrate on finding solutions, getting out of the situation, on what is in your power. After all, our thinking determines our actions.

How?

As the author explains, the life of many people turns into a vicious circle, because they think according to the same scheme: a certain thought evokes a standard emotion, which entails a habitual action, and this, in turn, leads to the same result. To get different results, you need to break the circle "thought - emotion - action - result" at the very beginning. You need to teach yourself to think differently, and then you will begin to feel differently, react differently and get different results.

Watch your thoughts - they become words. Watch your words - they become actions. Watch your actions - they become habits. Watch your habits - they become character. Watch your character - it determines fate.

What does thinking depend on and how to change it?

In many ways, thinking is determined by upbringing. If a person from childhood was told to behave with restraint and not stick out, he will not become a leader and will not take risks.

Previous experience also affects thinking. A good experience forces you to come back and repeat it many times, and an unsuccessful one forces you to be careful and avoid repeating it.

Affects thinking and environment. If it is customary in your environment to feel like a victim, then most likely you will feel the same way.

Social media and the media also influence the way we think. It is important to understand that negative and scandalous news attracts most people. But they distort the real picture of the world.

Do not forget about mental and physical exhaustion. We are unable to think constructively when we are tired.

It is important to be able to distinguish between these factors, to be aware of them and not to react automatically. Paul McGee believes that regardless of external events, we are personally responsible for our thinking.

How to recognize wrong thinking?

Paul McGhee cites several models of wrong thinking that most people are familiar with.

• An inner critic who undermines self-confidence. Remind yourself that we are all imperfect, mistakes happen, you just need to move on.
• Walking in circles with the same negative thoughts running through your head. It's important to remind yourself that this never improves the situation or solves the problem.
• The pleasure of feeling unhappy. Being unhappy is a good way to manipulate other people.
• Exaggeration of problems that distorts reality.

It is quite possible that it is not the circumstances that need to be changed, but only the point of view.

It is also important to consider that our primitive feelings and emotions turn on before rationality.

How to enable rationality? And are emotions really that bad?

People behave irrationally if they experience fear, anxiety, fatigue, hunger. Obeying the impulse, they can run away from the problem in panic. Because primitive emotional thinking developed in humans earlier than rational.

Of course, acting under the influence of emotion is not always a bad thing. If people always behaved reasonably, there would be no passion and excitement. And it would be more difficult to survive.

But our mind and logic help us find new solutions and get rid of wrong thinking.

How to enable rational thinking? Asking yourself questions. The nature of the questions determines the quality of the answers. If you ask yourself the question, "Why am I such a failure?", The brain will look for answers that confirm your worthlessness. But phrasing the question in a positive way will shift your focus. For example: "How can I improve the situation?", "What to do differently next time?"

Does S. U. M. O.method always work?

If something really serious or terrible has happened to a person, then the advice “shut up and do it”, of course, will be out of place.

What to do? You can get a little bogged down in your thoughts. Paul McGee compares this condition to that of a hippopotamus lying in the mud. We also need it, since people are not robots, we cannot turn off emotions, sometimes we need to fully feel them in order to move on.

In this state, people need the support of others, understanding. But it is important not to let this drag on, because the longer a person is in this state, the more difficult it is for him to move on and the more he procrastinates.

How to stop procrastinating?

People don't take action out of fear of discomfort and failure, or simply because of a lack of discipline.

The only way to overcome procrastination is to simply start doing something. Don't worry about completing an entire task or meeting deadlines. Just start doing it. In the process, you will feel motivated and happy that you did start. Memorize these pleasant feelings. Imagine and feel success, start with the most unpleasant and then enjoy the pleasant, reward yourself for success, find a support group.

Is this book worth reading?

The book is written in an easy and lively language. Thanks to the large number of stories from the life of the author, there is a feeling of a one-on-one conversation.

The ideas of the book themselves are not original and not new, but they are collected in one place with examples and explanations. If you haven't read any books on this topic, the S. U. M. O. will serve as a good motivation to take action.

Of course, the book will not say anything new to those who are well acquainted with the literature on self-development. And of course, there is no point in reading this book to convinced cynics or people who are sure that they know everything in the world. Nevertheless, the book is quite capable of regaining the lost motivation and positive attitude.