6 signs your couple is ready for a mortgage

1. Your relationship is a long-term project

It seems that this thesis sounds somewhat strange. If people are planning to buy joint property, then their relationship is definitely serious. The couple usually marry in parallel, have children and do whatever is expected from a long-term relationship. But the statistics are ruthless. 67.3% of couples who divorced did so within the first nine years after marriage. For comparison: in April 2021, mortgages were issued for an average of 19 years and 5 months.

With marriage, everything is somewhat simpler: entrance - 350 rubles, exit - 650 rubles from each spouse - these are the state fees. But to share housing in a mortgage and the loan itself is a most unpleasant occupation. The real estate is pledged by the bank, so it will be more difficult to sell it and it will be possible only on the terms of the lender. This, in turn, will affect the price: it will be lower than in free sale.

It is better not to make hasty decisions and look at the situation rationally. Of course, passion and surging hormones are nice. At the initial stage, it seems that nothing will destroy your love. But in the long run, this may not be enough. It is worth paying attention to how much you are ready to cooperate, to look for compromises. Do you understand that during the conditional 19 years and 5 months, the partner will change, just like you? Are you ready for this?

In general, it is better to look behind the hormonal curtain now and assess whether you are soberly looking at a common future or are simply hoping for miracles of love.

If everything is not going smoothly in the relationship, neither the wedding, nor the children, nor the mortgage will save them. Especially the mortgage!

2. You have the same plans for life

It is a big mistake for many couples to think that the default partner has the same goals for the future. And therefore they are not even discussed. But some things can be critical for relationships and mortgages. So it is imperative to talk about them “on the shore”.

For example, do you want children, how many and when. Leaving aside the bunny and lawn tales, a child is a costly project. Its appearance increases costs and reduces income. In the best case, earnings will decrease temporarily - while one of the parents is on parental leave.

But what if a woman, for example, announces that she wants to devote herself to children and will no longer go to work? This decision may come as a surprise to the husband if the couple has never discussed it - because it is not the default option. And the loss of half of the income from a mortgage is a critical event.

But the plans for children are not limited to everything. Some of the partners may want to move - to a larger city or to a house by the sea, or even emigrate. Or he dreams of changing his job radically, but does not talk about it. Things like this are best shared. First, they affect mortgage plans. Secondly, it is one of the markers that show whether your relationship is a long-term project.

3. You have already faced and passed the tests

There are people who take debts and obligations too lightly (and another question is whether it is worth entering into a relationship with them). But for many, credit is a pretty serious burden. This is not just another cost item. You will have to disciplined for many years to give money to the bank without delays and violations. And that's stress.

Couples can face difficulties in different ways. Someone unites in the face of trial. People work as a team, fighting a problem, not each other. A partner next to them makes each of them feel stronger and more confident. Such a relationship will survive not only the mortgage, but also other cataclysms.

If people under stress dissociate, begin to quarrel, blame each other, shift responsibility, then the mortgage can become a catalyst for separation. But there is a subtlety here. Often, two unfortunate people are ready to part ways, but they stay together and do not live the way they would like: the mortgage is the same. Perhaps, if there is a risk that you will not cope with the tests, it is better not to take long-term loans together.

4. You have the same views on spending - or are you ready to negotiate

A different attitude to money can be a problem for a couple without loans. But the mortgage will only exacerbate the confrontation. For example, one of the partners is rational and tight-fisted. He wants to limit himself in everything in order to pay off the mortgage ahead of schedule as quickly as possible. In his opinion, it is better to shrink for a few years, but throw off the shackles of credit. The second wants to live here and now. Choosing a budget vacation option, not changing the phone, less often ordering ready-made food is not for him. Let the overpayment on the loan increase several times, a free life is worth these investments.

It is easy to guess that in such a pair, in any case, someone will feel disadvantaged. And when trying to compromise, both will remain dissatisfied, because their desires will not be fully satisfied.

Therefore, with different views on money, it is necessary to be able to negotiate, give arguments, and not put pressure on the second partner. But the best thing, of course, is when two people meet, whose financial thinking does not differ radically.

5. You discussed the symmetry of contributions

According to the law, everything in the family is shared and divided equally. But inside the couple, it is still better to discuss such things so that no one feels unfairly deprived. Will you be paying the same amount for the mortgage per month, or will the cost of the loan be borne by one person, and the other will pay for the rest? How will expenses be distributed in general and will the way you manage your budget change with the purchase of an apartment?

If this is not discussed, various metamorphoses are possible in the future. For example, one partner pays most of his salary towards the loan, while the other pays for food, clothing and entertainment. However, after a few years, the first one may decide that this is completely his apartment, because he transferred his money. During a conflict, it is common for the other side's contribution to magically disappear from memory. However, the opposite situation may arise. A person spends all his salary on a loan, but at the same time he is forced to beg for money for important things, which the second partner considers trifles.

Both cases are unpleasant. But they can be avoided if monetary issues are discussed in advance. And it is better to fix it somewhere - at least just in the form of notes, so that you can refresh all decisions in your memory.

6. You have discussed financial and legal nuances

People are often afraid to discuss unpleasant moments for strange mystical reasons: "What if I make a will and thereby bring death upon myself?" But trouble happens by accident, in an absolutely routine way. And it's good when you or your loved ones have a plan for further action.

So it is better to discuss important points in advance, or even fix them in the appropriate document. For example, what happens if you break up? According to the law, property acquired in marriage must be divided in half. But it is possible that you will choose a different path. For example, one can pay compensation to another and stay with housing. Perhaps this should be already fixed in the marriage contract.

How will events unfold if one of you dies? Without a will, the partner's share will be automatically divided between the heirs of the first order: spouse, children, including from previous marriages, parents. However, debts are inherited too.

Loss of work, disability, other life troubles - everything should be discussed before the mortgage, not to let it go. And if it’s uncomfortable or scary to discuss it, it’s a signal that your relationship is not close enough to get involved in a mortgage.