8 things you don't have to do in a relationship

1. Sacrifice yourself

Your interests, desires and goals. Yes, relationships rarely go without compromise: sometimes you need to cancel what you have planned to help your loved one or just be around. But it's one thing if we are talking about isolated cases, and quite another if you constantly have to give up things that are important to you. Stop doing a hobby because your partner doesn't like it. End your career because he wants you to spend all your time with him, or because he thinks his job is more important.

To agree to this is to lose yourself. And in the long term, it is possible to destroy the relationship: the union is unlikely to be stable and harmonious when someone feels unhappy and unfulfilled. Besides, big sacrifices are not an act of pure altruism, but credit. And the second partner will sooner or later have to pay for him: listen to claims and reproaches.

2. Be together 24/7

Finding a pair does not mean turning into a two-headed four-armed creature that can only live in such a fused form. Each of you still has your own interests, plans and friends. You do not have to appear at all events together, spend every free minute together, share his hobbies with your partner.

Going to the movies not with a young man, but with friends is perfectly normal. In the same way as leaving the girl at home and going to workout yourself. Or go on vacation without a loved one. Or maybe even sleep in separate beds, if you're so comfortable.

Relationships are not slavery, but a voluntary union. Maintaining your boundaries and treating others with respect is very important. Otherwise, you can quickly get tired of each other, burn out and get bogged down in conflicts.

3. Change for the sake of a partner

Of course, in a relationship, we somehow change, develop and grow. But it is important that this process is natural and voluntary. For example, you and your partner had different views on a certain issue, but gradually one listened to the other and changed his position. Or, for the sake of another, some of you learned to be more caring, responsible and attentive, began to work with your negative qualities, openly discuss emotions and problems.

But if a person demands that you change your appearance, character, interests or views, and at the same time presses, manipulates, puts ultimatums, this is a very unhealthy situation. For example, a husband from an active and courageous career woman is trying to mold an agreeable housewife who is only interested in dresses, children and borscht. Or the wife insists that her partner go to the gym and pump up, and his own body is fine.

If a person chose you, he knew from the very beginning how you look, what you are fond of, what your views and plans are. So, demanding that you change is childish and not too honest. You should not give in to these manipulations.

4. Shorten the distance

Moving together, meeting your partner's parents, getting married - do not do this if you are not yet ready to move to a new level of relationship. You must move at a pace that is comfortable for you, and if your partner forces things and presses on you, this is a reason for serious conversation. After all, living under one roof, getting married and even more so giving birth to children is not necessary when it is supposed to, but when both are completely ready for this - emotionally, physically and financially.

5. Having sex without desire

And also agree to experiments that are unpleasant for you. Your body is not your partner's property, even if you are married. No one has the right to force you into proximity with physical force, threats or blackmail.

6. Solve other people's problems

An adult capable person bears responsibility for himself and his actions. This means that you should not correct other people's mistakes, apologize for your partner, always solve his problems. For example, to keep a soul mate, if initially there was no such agreement, or to perform household duties for a person, which he ignores. All these are manifestations of rudeness, irresponsibility and disrespect, and it is absolutely not necessary to endure this.

7. Forgive

Especially if your partner has done something that you cannot accept: betrayed, changed, failed. Or, it seems, does not do anything terrible, but systematically does what is unpleasant for you: being late, cheating, violating agreements, throwing things around, flirting with others. You have the right to be offended, demand an apology, or even break off a relationship, but you don't have to forgive against your will.

8. Endure

It happens that relationships bring more disappointment and pain than happiness and joy. For example, you no longer love each other, or your partner offends you, violates your boundaries, tries to manipulate you, plays with your feelings. Or maybe you just do not agree in characters or views and constantly swear because of this. Anyone has the right to get out of a relationship in which it is uncomfortable. Even if you and your partner have been together for a long time, married or raising children.