How a ham sandwich can help you find meaning in life

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

A tip for those who are puzzling over the meaning of life: start with the word meaning. According to writer Mark Manson, things can be as simple as making a regular ham sandwich.

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You know the main question. The question, which we have pondered more than once, is unable to fall asleep at night. A question that equally astonishes and dreads our helpless mind in front of it. Why are we here? What is the sense of life?

Luckily, I found the answer when I was at the gym this morning. I'm sure it's a ham sandwich. I have an explanation.

Before asking what is the meaning of life, we must understand another, perhaps more subtle and important question.

What is this very meaning?

Such a question will baffle anyone with its philosophical depth. So let's talk about ham sandwiches for a moment. It is important.

How is it to mean anything to anything? People have a need to make sense of everything that happens in their lives.

When my mother hugs me, it means that she loves me. When my boss praises me, it means that I am doing a good job. It will be sunny tomorrow, so I can put on my favorite T-shirt. As you can see, meaning is the relationship by which our mind connects two life experiences or, for example, events. X happens, followed by Y. In our understanding, X is the cause of Y.

To our head, the meaning seems to be an explanation of the madness that occurs in the world around us. This is an important process: it helps us anticipate what will happen next and keep our lives in check.

But let's be honest with ourselves: meaning is a very conditional mental category. Fifty people may witness the same event, but then explain it in fifty different ways. This is why politicians argue with each other so much. Why are witnesses in court so unreliable? Why do friends sometimes seem to be almost enemies, while they just look at things differently?

We take for the same two different semantic connections:

• Cause and investigation. You kick the ball, it rolls. You tell your friend that he has scary hair and you get a slap in the face. By doing X, you can be sure that Y will follow. We all need causal relationships to survive. They help to look into the future. Learn from the past. Their alignment involves those parts of our brain that are responsible for logic. Science, for example, is a continuous search for more and more causal relationships.
• Better and worse. Eating is better than starving. Making money is better than being poor. Sharing is better than stealing. These semantic categories are related to the nature of our values - what we consider to be the most important and useful in life. But they are the result of the work of those parts of the brain that are responsible for emotions. In general, what makes us feel good, we perceive as good or better.

These two semantic varieties are essential for survival. For thousands of years, people needed to know and remember the signs that indicate a change in weather, places where food can be found. In addition, they needed to understand how to earn recognition, approval and respect in their tribe. It turns out that semantic connections are a natural tool for motivation.

Evolution has made sure that each of us does his own thing. Meaning is at the heart of all our actions.

When a certain circumstance is of great importance to a person (for example, his child is sick or starving), he is ready to move mountains so that everything falls into place. Some people are willing to go further and give their lives for something that matters to them. For example, in the name of faith.

And in those situations when we feel a lack of meaning in life, when nothing seems important, when there is no clarity about how and why certain events happen to us, we do nothing. We just sit on the couch, press the buttons on the remote control, watch all sorts of nonsense and complain that they show nothing efficient.

This is the whole problem (I promise, now I will move on to talking about a sandwich with ham): the semantic content is the very flowers of life that we ourselves must grow. The meaning of life is not outside of our consciousness. This is not a universal cosmic truth that is just waiting to be revealed. Its discovery will not be the moment when you shout "Eureka!", But life will change once and for all.

It takes action to get to meaning. Continuous and consistent search.

Meaning is water for our psychological health. Without it, our minds, our hearts, will shrink and die. At the same time, like water, it flows through our fingers: what was important a few years ago does not matter today. And tomorrow this will change too. Without stopping, grains of vital meaning must be sought and found one after another.

By and large, the meaning of life is about making meaning.

How to make your actions meaningful

1. Solve problems

The more serious they are, the more value they see in overcoming them. This process is about finding ways to make the world a little better, from fixing the wiring in Mom's house to the challenging work of making a scientific breakthrough in physics.

But here's what's important: don't be picky, don't be selective. If you think about how insignificant we are in comparison with the immense universe, you can come to the following conclusion: it is better to do nothing before there is no opportunity to save the world. But this is a delusion. There are so many small everyday problems around that need attention. We need to start with them.

2. Help others

According to research, our sense of self is closely related to the quality of our relationships with other people. And the best way to fix them is to offer your help to the person. Another well-known fact: many people find it more pleasant to give than to receive. Here it is, a way to become a little happier.

These are clues for our mind: helping other people provides us with a sense of the meaningful fulfillment of life. “Someone felt better because I lived” - this thought should push forward to action.

Are goals a trap?

For some, setting goals helps find meaning. They want their own corner in the office, a big car, fancy shoes. This is a reason for them to get up in the morning, kill themselves at work, wait for the coming of tomorrow.

But goals are a double-edged sword. You have to be careful. Goals are motivating. But there is also a problem: by themselves they are empty and conventional. "Why?" - this is the question with which goal-setting should begin. Only achieving a meaningful goal will bring happiness and long-term satisfaction.

Ever seen retired celebrity athletes? Or millionaires who, although they earned almost all the money in the world, became unhappy, not knowing what to do next with their lives?

Goals mislead us: we see meaning in them as long as we achieve them, but it disappears as soon as we get what we want.

Therefore, the desire to make a million dollars, buy yourself a huge jeep or shoot for the cover of a magazine is superficial. Such accomplishments will not bring a sense of complete happiness.

By the way, goals don't always have to be big and ambitious. Take a ham sandwich, for example. I sat down to write this material hungry. This is a problem for me. But I promised myself to finish things first, and then make myself a sandwich. This gave the time that I spent on the article additional meaning. Maybe my wife is hungry, I could make a sandwich for her too. Remember, you need to help people in order to feel useful.

What is the sense of life? Right now, for me, it's a ham sandwich. And for you?