Emotion Fading Effect: Why We Agree Again What Was Really Bad

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

We explain from a scientific point of view where situations come from in the style of "life teaches you nothing."

The first time I competed in an amateur crossfit competition, it was just awful. It was wildly cold in the gym, it was difficult to warm up, but I spent the whole day there, periodically performing killer complexes.

After the first one, I thought that I would have to crawl out of the site, because my legs gave out, and after the second, I wanted to go home and change crossfit to yoga. In general, I felt bad and completely unhappy. But six months passed, and I signed up for new competitions.

Remember how often you tell funny stories about how scared, hurt, and offensive you were. However, any scrape in a couple of years can be an excellent joke. And all of this explains the fading effect of emotions.

What is this effect

Richard Walker conducted three studies in which he compared the emotions of people immediately after the event and three months, one year and 4.5 years after it.

The participants in the experiment kept diaries: they wrote down the events of their lives and assessed how pleasant each of them was. Scientists collected notes every week, and at the end of the experiment invited participants to the laboratory to assess past events.

All three experiments showed that the more time elapsed, the less emotion aroused by what happened.

But then they discovered one oddity: negative emotions faded out faster than positive ones.

It would seem that from an evolutionary point of view it is useful to keep negative emotions longer. After all, they arise in response to something unpleasant, which means they can help a person avoid potentially dangerous events. But scientists have found the opposite effect.

Why do people forget the negative

There are several reasons why negativity fades so quickly from memory.

Change of circumstances and attitudes towards them

A person changes throughout his life. And what previously seemed like a catastrophe, in the light of new experience, may appear in a completely different way.

For example, a man proposes and a woman refuses. He experiences anger, sadness, frustration. After a while, he finds another partner who suits him much more, and creates a strong and happy family.

In light of new events, memories of a past lover can evoke positive emotions.

After all, if she had not abandoned the marriage, the man would have wasted his time and would not have found the wonderful family that he has now.

Childhood memories can change in the same way. For example, at that time you were covered in cold sweat from the thought of the monster under the bed. But now you understand that there was no danger, and the memories make you smile.

Making history more profitable

Most of the highlights from life turn into stories. Since everyone wants to present their life as something interesting and generally good, the emotional color of the event often changes.

Positive stories cause laughter from those around them, which pleases the narrator and changes his memory of real emotions experienced in the past.

Over time, the real circumstances are erased, and only the story remains in the memory. And the person believes that everything was so.

This theory is supported by a study in which people were asked to recall four life stories: two popular stories, told more than 10 times, and two personal ones, which were shared no more than five times. Also, the participants had to remember the experiences that they shared with a wide range of people, and stories for a narrow audience.

It turned out that popular stories, which were told more often and in large companies, were more positive than personal stories for a narrow circle of listeners.

Why do we need this mechanism

There are several reasons, and they are all necessary for a person's mental health.

Getting rid of unnecessary stress

Life events do not disappear anywhere - they remain in memory and become part of your history.

When you remember bad events, you experience negative emotions, and the body reacts to this by releasing cortisol, the stress hormone.

If negative emotions did not fade over time, you would be much more depressed.

And this is harmful, for cognitive abilities and health in general.

Establishing a positive outlook on yourself and your life

To be successful in society, cope with new experiences and keep motivated to do something, a person needs to know that he is cool and believe that everything will be fine.

It has been proven that for people with depression and anxiety disorders, the effect of attenuating emotions works less well, so that they drag along much more negativity from the past.

The fading effect of negative emotions, on the other hand, helps to create a positive outlook on yourself and your life and to continue to act further, despite the fact that mistakes, failures and emotional pain await at every turn.

How to avoid this effect

Despite the fact that this effect of attenuation of emotions is simply necessary for a person to live, it can sometimes be misleading.

For example, when you again agree to something that did not bring pleasure the last time. Surely there were events in your life during which you thought: “This is the last time! I won't do this anymore. But later, under the influence of other people, they again agreed.

In such situations, journaling can help. This is generally a useful thing that will save you from wasting your time. If you vaguely remember that the event brought little joy in the past, re-read your notes and draw conclusions.