How to get rid of bad habits and develop good ones

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Almost everything we do is habit. We act in a certain way when we brush our teeth, tie our shoelaces, go to work, to the gym, to the bar … We learn the sequence of steps necessary to achieve a specific result and get used to them. In this article, you will learn how habits are formed and how to learn how to change the bad for the good.

The Habit Formation Cycle

When we do something the first few times, our consciousness remains active throughout the entire process. However, when a sequence of steps leads to success over and over again, the cognitive functions of the brain gradually shut down - from the moment the process began to its completion.

The habit-forming cycle has three elements.

1. Signal is what causes the habit. Negative emotions such as boredom, loneliness, or stress can play this role. Also, a signal can be a specific situation, environment, time of day and other circumstances.
2. Program of action is a habit in itself. For example, smoking, overeating, or procrastination.
3. Reward is something that brings pleasure. It can be obvious if we are talking, for example, about the effect of nicotine or sugar on the body. However, reward can also be associated with a sense of acceptance, belonging, or victory.

Once the habit is ingrained, our minds anticipate the reward as soon as the signal is received. When this happens, we receive a tiny dose of the pleasure hormone dopamine. Basically, we taste the reward before we complete the action. This is enough to make you want, but not enough to get satisfaction.

If we take in the cue, but we don’t implement the program of action and do not receive the reward, we feel melancholy, and then a strong desire. This is exactly what keeps the gambler at the table and makes the addict do whatever they want for a dose.

Feedback loop

The more often we repeat the signal-program-reward cycle, the more we will establish the habit. Gambling or drugs are quick and frighteningly addictive. This is due to the fact that when a player loses money after a game or a drug addict does not receive a dose, they feel the same despair that triggered the action program.

In theory, breaking a bad habit is easy. In practice, everything is more complicated. The main thing is to find motivation.

To “uninstall” a bad habit, you need to identify the signal, program of action, and reward that are associated with it. After that, you can leave the signal and reward unchanged, but start working on replacing the program of action with a good one.

One of the most famous works on habits was written by Charles Duhigg and is called The Power of Habit. According to her, it is not only possible, but also necessary to “remove” a bad habit and “establish” a good one instead. Follow the plan …

1. What is the signal?

The signal may not be obvious. You may be eating an extra portion at certain times of the day. Or maybe the urge to overeat becomes especially acute when you are sitting in front of the TV? Perhaps you only want to eat something when you feel irritated?

Signals are divided into five main categories:

1. A place.
2. Time.
3. Emotional condition.
4. People around you.
5. Action preceding the signal.

It is important to find out what exactly causes you to crave this or that action. Therefore, keep a diary and try to answer the following questions in it:

1. Where are you at?
2. What time is it now?
3. What is your emotional state?
4. Who else is there?
5. What preceded the appearance of the signal?

The real signal is constant and unchanging.

2. What is the reward?

Once you've identified the signal, experiment with different routines and rewards accordingly. This is necessary to determine how exactly the reward acts on you, what mechanisms bring you pleasure.

You may not be able to break the habit of eating sweets, and then the reward works in an obvious way. Maybe you're avoiding feelings of inferiority or using a bad habit to distract yourself from work.

Experimenting with programs of action and rewards is necessary to find ways to partially relieve the urge to return to a bad habit.

For example, one day try drinking a glass of water instead of an extra cup of coffee. The next one, drink it in another room. Swap coffee for a series of push-ups, sing a song, get busy, or call your mom.

Every time you replace a habitual program of action with a new scenario, you have the opportunity to check whether the desire to return to the bad habit has become weaker. If it has decreased, then some of the new action programs are working.

You can experiment with variations on the habit you want to break. For example, try brewing an extra cup of coffee without drinking it, but placing it next to your work area and just keep working. Perhaps you just want to take a short break, rather than get a dose of caffeine. Or the scent of coffee will be enough to make you feel relieved.

3. What is the plan of action?

Once you've identified the signal and reward for your bad habit, you need to come up with a plan. The idea is to wait for the signal, and after it appears, start a new program of action that satisfies the desire.

Write down your plan as a proof that you are serious and place it in a way that reminds you of itself at all times. Hang on the refrigerator or set as wallpaper on your smartphone screen.

All this is needed in order to say with confidence: "Every day, when I receive a signal, I will implement a new program of action."

It will be difficult at first, but if you stick to the plan of action, it will be easier for you to deal with the urge to return to the bad habit.

Imagine how you are implementing a new, useful program of action. When you imagine something many times in a row, you begin to believe it. Accordingly, you catalyze the desire to implement the action plan.

Create new good habits

This scheme also works for setting completely new behavioral frameworks. Simply define the signal and reward, and then match it to the desired course of action. Work according to the specified plan for several weeks in a row: then you will begin to act automatically.

For example, to start jogging in the morning, place a pair of sneakers near your bed. When you wake up, you will see them and feel that you must complete your plan of action. As a reward, you can enjoy a delicious after-run smoothie or enjoy endorphins and self-esteem.

The more often you do this, the stronger the expectation of the reward will be, which will be triggered simply by the sight of sneakers by the bed.

And something else

You can break the habit by taking advantage of life's turning points. Many people quit smoking after moving, changing jobs, or being overwhelmed. Any significant event has such a profound effect on you that it opens up opportunities for changing the habit-forming cycle.

Therefore, any bad event in your life can be the beginning of positive changes. For example, if you get fired, it's time to kick the bad habit and find time for something new, positive, and rewarding.