Why you can't be a loner or devote your life to work: the deepest study

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Seventy-five years is an unprecedented period for sociological observation. And this is how much Harvard scientists studied more than 700 people from different social backgrounds to estimate how happily and long they will live their lives. Three main conclusions from such a large-scale observation are not in favor of those who justify their loneliness or pursue world fame, live in squabbles or disappear at work.

Robert J. Waldinger Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, head of several scientific laboratories, minister

We are constantly told that we need to rely on work, diligence and achieving more. We get the impression that this is exactly what we need to strive for in order to live a better life. The complete picture of life, decisions made by people and the consequences of these decisions - such a picture is practically inaccessible to us.

But what if we could see life as it develops over time? What if we could trace people from adolescence to old age and see what actually makes them healthy and happy?

This is what we did.

The basis for the TED talk “What does it take to live a good life? Lessons from the Longest Study on Happiness”Robert Waldinger, a renowned American psychiatrist and prominent contemporary scientist, cites the unique observation of two groups of men of different social status: students of the prestigious Harvard College and adolescents from poor areas of Boston. For 75 years, scientists have been tracking how the lives of 724 participants in the experiment will develop, depending on their lifestyle: whether they can live a long and happy life or leave this world without knowing ordinary human happiness.

In addition to regularly questioning the volunteers themselves about their health, career and personal life, the scientists conducted medical examinations with blood sampling and a brain tomogram. The family members of these gradually maturing men also gave their assessment of what was happening. Thus, it was possible to draw up a holistic picture that shed light on the source of longevity and happiness of certain participants, some of whom have already exceeded 90 years by now.

So, where do you focus your efforts to die with happy eyes in old age? The speaker gives three simple points to remember.

Loneliness kills

First, the relationship with people is very useful for us, and loneliness kills.

The presence of social connections determines the physical health of a person. People who have strong family ties and are on good terms with their colleagues and acquaintances are physically healthier. Lonely people, on the contrary, feel worse, their brains age earlier, which generally reduces their life expectancy.

The quality of the relationship matters

The second lesson we have learned: it's not about the number of friends or whether you have a constant couple, but about the quality of these relationships with loved ones.

Sometimes it is better to divorce or quit your job so as not to poison your life with extremely harmful conflict relationships. Such relationships are detrimental to human health. In turn, a warm mental environment protects people from early health problems.

Trust strengthens the senile mind

And the third lesson we have learned about relationships and health is that good relationships not only protect our bodies, they protect our brains.

In older couples, where it is customary to trust each other and lend a strong shoulder in difficult times, mental steadiness remains longer. Couples whose life together is only a scattered coexistence experience memory problems much earlier.

What to do knowing all this

In conclusion, I would like to note that a large-scale study of Harvard scientists is just beginning: now 2 thousand children of the original participants in the experiment are involved in it. However, today's interim conclusions are unlikely to change in 75 years. We will still be advised to call our parents more often, visit them with children, meet friends, take care of our marriage and become comrades with our colleagues.

Relationships have no guarantees, they are complex, confusing and require constant effort, commitment to family and friends, there is no glitter and glamor. And there is no end. This is the work of a lifetime.