Life hacks for efficiency from a mother of many children

Are you a mom and you don't have time for anything? Children do not allow you to be realized the way you want? Is there chaos in your house and in your life, and it seems that it will be so until the children grow up? Trust me, no! You can do a lot more, put things in order, make plans, and spend a lot of time with your kids.

Lifestyle

Before you start optimizing your time, take care of your basic needs and sort out your resources. Adequate sleep and physical activity, quality nutrition - what should be a priority.

1. Find your resource

Mom has many places where you can spend energy, but where to get it, she does not think. In the meantime, the resource should not be allowed to run out to zero. We must constantly replenish it. What fills you: a bath, a book, a walk, delicious food, laughter, an interesting movie, sports? Plan it, have something in every day to support you.

You go for a walk with children - walk for yourself, not for them. Cook - Cook for yourself, not just for your family. Clean up - Clean up as if you were doing cardio or strength training. Give the children mops too.

2. Know your limit

Learn what is draining you and minimize those impacts. If you don’t like to play, don’t play, organize a company of peers for the children. If you don't like to read aloud, turn on audio stories.

Motivation

You must want to do what you do.

3. Define your global goals and mission in life

This is the most difficult point, and for some it takes a lifetime. But it's worth it. To figure it out, try different ways: working with feelings, childhood trauma and attitudes, psychotherapy, constellations, and so on.

4. Take small, motivating steps

For me, this is the daily morning ritual of setting up for the day. I learned about this method from the book "Magic of the Morning" by Hal Elrod. I wake up before everyone else, meditate for a few minutes, read short affirmations, write in a diary. Remind myself that I can make every day a better day. To do this, you need to do what is necessary, not what is convenient, and not waste time on what does not lead to the goal.

Planning

Don't push yourself too tightly. Don't make a plan that has a minute-by-minute schedule. With children, you still cannot follow it. But he will pressure you, frustrate and demotivate you.

5. Plan no more than two big things a day

Depending on your activity, this can be one work activity for a certain time and one household or children's one. Meeting with the client and going to the grocery store. Laundry and one hour and a half webinar. Lunch preparation and video conference. A trip to the doctor with children and a yoga class. And that's all - for this day, there are no more compulsory tasks and plans. Have them done - praise yourself, you have fulfilled your plan for the day.

6. Make a list of global things that bring you closer to your dream

To write a book, listen to a course of lectures, read the complete collected works of Tolstoy, disassemble all cabinets, wash the curtains - everyone has their own. Break them into small pieces of 30-40 minutes each. Do it in the order you want and when the opportunity arises. But do it.

Time optimization

Learn to do everything well and quickly. Good doesn't mean perfect. Quickly means you take it and do it, without unnecessary hesitation and without delay. For example, I do a lot of computer work, I spent three months learning how to touch-type. I have to write - I sit down and write. I need to make an unpleasant call - I just pick up the phone and call. This is a common skill, it will get easier and easier every time.

7. Make it easier to prepare meals throughout the week

A multicooker, a double boiler, an egg cooker, an oven, a stove with a timer practically cook themselves. What can be prepared, do with a margin. Homemade soups, fermented and dried vegetables, freeze-dried broth and sauces all save time.

8. Organize the proper care of things

Teach children to clean up after themselves, not to put dirty things in the closet. Disassemble their wardrobe, let them have a few clothes, get rid of everything unnecessary. Remove seasonal clothing in a timely manner. Start a tumble dryer - you don't have to hang things up and iron most of them. Well, use dry cleaning and laundry - your time should be worth more than their services.

9. Organize your closets

I have it like this: what can be hung - hanging, what can be folded - folded vertically. The vertical folding method is very important: then everything is visible at once and there is no mess when pulling out. This is how panties, socks, T-shirts, sweaters, pants, home clothes, sports uniforms - everything are folded. Lay things out after washing yourself, do not trust your children or your husband - this way you can control the order in the closets and sort things in a timely manner.

10. Make a place for every thing in the house

Then it will be much easier to clean. Keep all the same type of things in one place: documents, toys, clothes, stationery, books - let everything have a clear place in the apartment. Shelves and drawers should not be stuffed to the eyeballs - then everything is in plain sight and easily accessible. The maintenance of order will also happen by itself. There is a wonderful book about this "The Magic Cleaning" by Marie Kondo.

11. Sort cases according to the necessary conditions and duration

Things that need loneliness: scheduling, complex paperwork, construction and other calculations, writing, recording videos and podcasts, business conversations and meetings, yoga class, massage. They all take about an hour and a half. Set aside time for them in the morning when everyone is asleep, when the children are watching a long cartoon or playing with friends. Let them be no more than 2–2.5 hours a day.
Activities that do not require loneliness and concentration, do with children: cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, exercising, listening to webinars, chatting informally or shortly with clients, walking, swimming, reading, surfing the Internet, or taking a nap. Communication with children is formed from such joint activities, and there is no need to play with them and entertain them.
Cases for 15 minutes: prepare a simple dish and put it in the oven, read 20-30 pages of text, sketch out an article outline or some other plan, wash and style your hair, do a set of exercises, load a dishwasher or washing machine, clean up 1-2 shelves, have a snack, read an article, answer letters, write to a friend and chat, cut children's nails, iron a set of bedding or 10 T-shirts, pickle vegetables for future use, flip through the feed of a social network (I recommend including this in a 15-minute affair, then you will not get carried away) - well, and much more.
Cases for 30 minutes: cook a more complex dish or cut everything for a soup, make a complex or complex preparation, iron and distribute linen to the closets from one wash, change 4-5 sets of bedding, read 30-60 pages of text, write several pages, listen to half an hour webinar - and so on, everyone will have their own.
Things to do for an hour there won't be much, two - even less. It must be remembered that a big deal can always be divided and carried out in two stages, if circumstances do not immediately allow it to be done.

12. Combine several things

This is what really increases the number of hours in a day. Everyone can have their own actions, the general principle is preserved. I will tell you how I do it, and you form your habits of Julius Caesar.

When I clean or cook, I either do it with the kids or listen to something. I always have something to listen to, I have a whole list. It is clear that there should be technical capabilities: mobile Internet, Wi-Fi, wireless headphones.
When I go for a walk with children or to the sea, to classes, I always have a book with me or listen to something. If the walk promises to be long, then I even take a laptop. While the children play, and they play for hours, I can even complete a task for an hour and a half, requiring loneliness.
When I take part in webinars or some kind of online meeting that requires me to connect only occasionally, I simultaneously put things away in places, sort out clothes, fold little things, sharpen pencils, arrange socks by color, clean pans, sometimes squat and do push-ups … And the webinar was watched, and things were done, and I played sports.
When I cook something complicated, I don't stand and wait for the water to boil or the pan heats up, I take apart the dishwasher, I can quickly rearrange the pots or wipe the drawers, take things to their places. You can clean up and cook soup at the same time, for example. And you can do all this with an audiobook in headphones. And you can also wear a fitness elastic band on your legs.
When I just go somewhere or go and there is no opportunity to listen or read something, then I make plans and think, write down in notes or in a notebook. During the massage and care procedures, I try to relax as much as possible, and during the pedicure, always at the computer - here's another opportunity to do the very thing that requires loneliness.
When I watch a cartoon with children or a movie with my husband, I do something with my hands: iron, sew, knit, sort something, fix clothes and books, clean cutlery.
When I drive in a car, I listen to audio, watch videos in traffic, have long conversations on the speakerphone that I don't allow myself at other times, do intimate gymnastics or facial exercises, sometimes I paint.

In general, this is a matter of habit and desire. Look for opportunities to combine - and there will be more time in the day.

13. Put everything in order

In order not to waste time looking for the right recipe, document or book, you need to keep everything in order and always have it at hand. I have several lists, they are called very simply: "Buy", "Read", "Listen", "Cook", "View", "Go". So everything is always at hand and you don't need to memorize anything - added it to the list and returned to it when there is an opportunity. Very convenient programs-schedulers, programs for purchases, book storage, audio and video. The main thing is to make your own clear lists in them.

14. Eliminate the time eaters

First of all, these are social networks - I allocate time for them in 15-minute intervals, so that the frames make me disconnect on time and get busy.
These are people who constantly complain, they are unhappy with everything. You will not help them, you will not solve their problem, you will simply waste time and energy on them. Avoid them.
This is a mental "gum" and hovering on past events. Instead of thinking and planning something inspiring or listening to something interesting, you go over past events or fantasize about who and what you will say and what will be answered. We also need to get rid of this.
Alcohol, fatty plentiful food, TV also do not allow spending time consciously and effectively. Don't let them rule you.

All these rules of life allow me with four children, everyday tasks and several "jobs" to feel free and relaxed. To do a lot, but not to be in the constant grip of time pressure. This summer they allowed me to fulfill my dream and start writing. And to write a lot: a dissertation, half a book and six articles.

I love to enjoy life, and I also love when everything happens by itself. Try it yourself!