Where does infantilism come from and what to do with it

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Behavior like a child is a serious reason to think about a visit to a therapist.

Let's face it: what is infantilism, even professionals have not fully figured out Immature Personality Disorder: Contribution to the Definition of this Personality.

In the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-10 F60.8 Other specific personality disorders), this concept appears in the ICD-10 Classification of Mental Disorders in the list of personality and behavioral disorders - along with such well-known problems as passive-aggressive, psychoneurotic, narcissistic disorders. But in the psychotherapist's handbook, the current edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), there is no infantilism.

The reason is that there are no specific, generally recognized symptoms that could be used to unequivocally diagnose Infantile Personality Disorder. Research is still underway. But it is still possible to recognize a person with this violation. The life hacker found out how.

What is infantilism

In a general sense, infantilism means immaturity. This concept is used not only in psychology. For example, there is physiological infantilism - a condition in which an adult is seriously lagging behind in physical development: has a small stature, childish features. Or sexual infantilism - the immaturity of the genitals.

Psychological immaturity means Immature Personality Disorder: Contribution to the Definition of this Personality, that a person is not ready to function in the adult world. His behavioral patterns, habits, lifestyle do not correspond to those of normal individuals.

Here it is necessary to make a digression about what the norm is. Societies are different. Somewhere, for example, it is customary for a child to leave his or her home immediately after adulthood, and somewhere it is considered quite normal when a son or daughter lives with their parents all their lives and brings their own family under a common roof.

When we talk about infantilism, we mean that an adult looks like an immature, dependent, “child” in the context of the society of which he is a part.

However, living with parents, while peers have become autonomous for a long time, or, let's say, obeying their mother at 45 is not a diagnosis yet. Psychologists say about infantile personality disorder Immature Personality Disorder: Contribution to the Definition of this Personality, when a person is inflexible, maladaptive. He cannot rebuild, “grow up,” even when his childhood habits threaten to ruin his family and career.

This dangerous ill-being (“He behaves like a helpless child or a frivolous teenager, this makes everyone feel bad, including him”) and is the main criterion for mental disorder.

How to recognize infantilism

The symptoms of psychological immaturity are extensive and varied. They often overlap with signs of other disorders - narcissistic, passive-aggressive, eccentric. But there are some key points about Immature Personality Disorder: Contribution to the Definition of this Personality. Infantilism can be suspected if a person exhibits several of these features at once.

Irresponsible behavior

Crossing the road at a red light, losing an important document, disrupting a deadline, earning a minimum wage for years. By such actions, a person actually shifts responsibility from himself to the surrounding "adults". It is they who must take care of his safety, restore the papers, do something about the timing of the task and pay for the groceries and utilities.

Mood swings

In people with infantilism, they have a sharper amplitude than usual. A good mood often takes the form of childishness, foolishness.

Impulsiveness

A person is proud that at any moment he can suddenly go somewhere. Or, for example, to send someone proudly and independently.

Failure to set goals and make long-term plans

In simple words, a person lives without thinking about tomorrow.

Inability to manage money

They either completely descend on endless wishes, or accumulate under the pillow for a rainy day.

Propensity for risky behavior

Examples of this behavior include love of gambling, extreme sports, dangerous driving, drug addiction, promiscuous sex.

Avoiding awkward situations

Call a government agency to resolve some issue. Go to the parents' meeting at school. Talk to a neighbor who leaves trash bags in the stairwell. All this turns out to be overwhelming tasks for a person, which he happily passes on to others.

Feeling superior to others

"All around are fools."

Excessive requirements for loved ones

A person always knows what a partner, children or other family members should do. For example, from a three-year-old child, he may require mandatory cleaning in the apartment in the evenings, and not for the sake of cleanliness, but exclusively as part of the educational process. And from my spouse - a daily hot dinner of a couple of dishes. At the same time, the requirements for oneself, on the contrary, are reduced: the person suffering from infantilism owes nothing to anyone.

Ingratitude towards others

Even if they submit to excessive demands.

The desire to devalue loved ones

At the same time, people with infantile disorder emphasize their own importance.

The desire to shift responsibilities to others

A person leaves household problems, taking care of children to his relatives, often accompanying it with phrases like “What can you do here ?!”, “Can't you handle it yourself?”.

Hostility towards the roles that society expects

Man, woman, father, mother, friend, partner - for people with infantile disorder, this is often an empty phrase. They basically behave the way they want, ignoring the "society-imposed" behavior patterns.

Low level of empathy

For a person, only his experiences exist. He is indifferent to the feelings and emotions of others.

Fear of admitting wrong

A mature adult can say, "I was wrong." A person with infantilism will dodge to the end and repeat: "It's not me, you ruined everything!"

Where does infantilism come from?

It is assumed that psychological immaturity can be caused by one of three factors Immature Personality Disorder: Contribution to the Definition of this Personality (or a combination thereof).

• Individual neurobiological characteristics. A person is born "forever young", his "childishness" is due to the structure of the brain.
• Traumatic brain injury. Such damage disrupts the activity of the central nervous system. If the trauma was received in childhood or adolescence, it can stop psycho-emotional development - the person will forever remain a "child".
• Childhood experiences. Infantilism often affects those who are overprotected by their parents. Or the other extreme: abandoned children who are either tired of the overwhelming responsibility in their early years and now seek to shift it onto someone else, or they miss the figure of a loving father or mother so much that they appoint others to this role.

What to do with infantilism

Infantilism is one of the least studied personality disorders. It is extremely difficult to treat it. If only for the reason that the person with this violation himself is unlikely to recognize the existing problem.

In addition, as we said above, infantilism is often accompanied by symptoms of other types of mental disorders. So the therapy, even if the person agrees to it, will be long and rather difficult.

Psychologists advise, if possible, not to get involved in this game of re-education and not to take on the solution of other people's problems.

If there is an option to simply stop communicating with someone who suffers from infantilism, do so.

But, of course, this is not always possible. If your loved one demonstrates infantile features, there is only one way out: to convince the “child” to see a psychotherapist. The physician will get to know the patient better and select the most effective treatment option for him.

By the way, psychotherapy will be useful to you if you are forced to contact a person who has an infantile disorder on a daily basis. With its help, you will learn to resist attempts to manipulate you. And you will be able to restore self-esteem, which has probably suffered from traumatic communication.