12 parenting secrets you won't find in parenting books

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

I'm sure most parents will agree that being a mom or dad is one of the most amazing and important tasks we have to do in life. Many smart and useful books have been written on this topic, explaining literally every nuance of parenting. But there are several important secrets of this process that you will not read about on the pages of books. Their knowledge will help you not only to raise your children correctly, but also to get mutual pleasure from it.

1. All parents lose patience sometimes

Being a parent means doing tremendous emotional, mental, and sometimes physical work. Your efforts will not always be appreciated and you will see immediate returns from them. Sometimes, on the contrary, we meet such fierce resistance that our hands give up. Therefore, it is quite natural that sometimes there is a desire to lose your temper and give vent to your emotions. Do not hold back and throw out everything that has accumulated. If this is not done, then the consequences will be much worse.

2. Parents buy the newest and most expensive toys primarily for themselves

Until a certain age, a child is generally purple, how much is this or that toy. He may well prefer to tinker with a plastic bowl, paper cups and chestnuts instead of an expensive toy food processor. And it’s all the more ridiculous to demand from a child some kind of special attitude to a purchased toy just because it cost you dearly. It is more important to teach a daughter or son to enjoy simple things than to injure his psyche with the numbers on the price tag.

3. You have the right to be angry

Many parents, especially young ones, believe that under any circumstances they should love their child and show this love to him in every possible way. This is not true. Sometimes children turn into real monsters that can infuriate even a meditation champion. Of course, you should not immediately take them to the shelter because of this, but you need to show your real feelings.

4. Your "no" won't kill them

Every child should have their own clearly defined boundaries of what is permissible. And your clear and firm "no" serves to define them. They will sulk and cry, throw tantrums or pretend to be angels, but no tricks should mislead you and force you to resolve what you consider harmful, dangerous or just plain stupid.

It’s easy and pleasant to say “yes” all the time, but resist the temptation.

5. Children should have time to be independent

If you constantly run and take care of your child, then it is ridiculous to demand independence and self-sufficiency from him. Constant help interferes with the emergence of the ability to overcome difficulties and the development of creativity. Therefore, be sure to deliberately leave children alone so that they can find something to do and entertain themselves without assistance.

6. You have the right to rest

As important as the task of raising children is, you too can get tired of it. Let your kids read, paint, play with toys while relaxing, meditating, or just watching TV. Let them know that your time is inviolable and cannot be interrupted by their screams or regular wishes.

7. Proper nutrition starts at an early age

Many parents, especially grandmothers, have completely wild ideas about baby food. Yes, it has its own characteristics, but this does not mean that the child needs to be fed with chips, pies and ice cream. Very often you can observe a picture when parents are trying to observe some dietary restrictions for themselves, and their children are fed with all the advertised nasty things, justifying it with the words: "Eat while you are young, you still can." This is completely unacceptable.

8. You must have your own entertainment

Being a parent is not a punishment. This does not mean at all that you should give up your personal life and completely dissolve in nurturing and caring. If you sometimes go to the cinema, club, visit friends or the stadium yourself, it will not make you instantly a bad dad or mom! Just strike a reasonable balance.

9. You must know the names of all Pokémon

And also biographies of heroes of popular video games, plots of children's films, and later the names of cool groups. You don't want to be a mossy dinosaur ahead of time in your child's eyes, do you?

10. Sometimes you have to apologize

In relation to your child, you will make mistakes more than once.

There are no people who never make mistakes.

There will be unfair decisions, unfounded reprimands, just awkward movements. And the best thing that can be done after that to restore faith in justice is to simply apologize. Although sometimes it is not easy at all.

11. Raising children can be terribly difficult and at the same time damn enjoyable

Within one day, but what a day there - one hour! - you can several times fall into the abyss of disappointment and rise to the heavens of jubilation. With an interval of 10 minutes, you can experience a surge of severe anger, which will immediately be replaced by a burst of tears of emotion. These are perfectly normal emotions that all normal parents experience. If you feel that you are not coping with it, and your reactions become too aggravated, then it is time to seek help and take a short (or long) time out. If you continue to rape yourself and your psyche, then this can harm not only you, but also your child.

12. You will always compare your child and the result will always be the same

Your child is great. He is the fastest, smartest, most agile and quick-witted. And if someone has doubts about this, then it is, obviously, just out of envy.

And, you know, in this you are absolutely right.