Life isn't fair and you need to learn to live with it

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

We are used to complaining that life is not fair. In fact, the whole problem is your wrong idea of justice. Justice for each of us is our own success multiplied by selfishness. After reading this article, you will understand why you need to change this.

If you don't win, then life will always seem unfair. But life is a game and it has rules. They are difficult and therefore most of us do not want to learn them.

You can try.

Rule # 1. Life is a Competition

The business you are working on? Someone is trying to ruin it. A job that you enjoy? Someone wants to replace you with a computer program. Pretty girl, high-paying job, Nobel Prize, who do you want? Someone else wants them.

We are constantly competing, but we prefer not to notice it. Most of the achievements are noticeable only in comparison with others. You swam a little more kilometers, got more likes, or sing a little better than average. Great job!

We do not want to consider ourselves mediocre, so we constantly hear phrases:

"Give it 100%"

or

"Your only obstacle is yourself."

The strangest thing about these sayings is that they are designed to make you stronger. But they are deceiving you. Your main obstacle is not you, but seven billion other people.

We try to look good in order to get a job, prepare carefully for interviews and try to show our best side. And it all depends on whether you can beat others or not. And if you squeeze everything out of yourself, then you can.

Rule # 2. You are judged by your actions, not your thoughts

Society judges people by what they do for others. Can you rescue a child from a burning house, remove a tumor, or make hundreds of people laugh? Society will appreciate you.

We judge ourselves by our thoughts.

I'm ambitious

I am a good person, I'm better than him.

This is how you see yourself, but others see differently.

Good intentions are not appreciated in this world, your inner sense of dignity and morality is not interesting to anyone. Others only care what you can do for them.

We think that society rewards those people who do the highest quality work. It looks like this:

In fact, the reward depends on the number of people you have influenced:

Write an ingenious book that nobody has read - you are nobody. Write Harry Potter and the world will recognize you. Save someone's life - you are almost an unknown hero of your town; find a cure for cancer - you will go down in history as one of the greatest people.

The same rule applies to any profession, even the most unusual. Strip in front of one person and they will laugh at you; strip in front of 50 million people and you might be Kim Kardashian.

You can hate it, you can disagree. But no one cares. You will be judged by your actions, not your thoughts. If you do not accept this, the world will not accept you.

Rule # 3: Our Model of Integrity is Selfish

People like it when everything is fair. Therefore, we have created referees in sports games and judges in courts: each of us has a sense of right and wrong, and we think that others are no different. Our parents say so. Our teachers say the same.

Be a good boy and get some candy.

Unfortunately no. You studied hard but failed the exam. You worked harder than others, but you didn't get promoted. You loved her, but she didn't answer your calls.

The problem is not that the world is unfair. The problem is that your model of justice is broken

Take a look at the person you like but don't like you. This is a person with dozens of years of experience different from yours. A real person who communicates with hundreds, thousands of people every year.

And now think: what is the chance that this person will also choose you from hundreds of others? And most importantly, why? Because you exist? Because you are special? Because you feel something for him? This is important to you, but not to him.

This also includes our dislike for bosses, politicians, parents. Their thoughts are wrong. And stupid! After all, they are not the same as mine. They have to agree with me, because I am an expert in everything!

There are good people and bad people. There are good and bad politicians. But many of them are not as bad as you might think. And they have other thoughts besides stuffing their own pockets and oppressing you. Some of them try their best, going through many circumstances that you are not aware of.

Why life isn't fair

Can you imagine what it would be like if life were fair for everyone? If you like someone, then you should like him in return. The relationship would end with the simultaneous death of both partners, and the rain would only fall on bad people.

Most of us are so fixated on the idea of how the world should work that we don't see how it actually works.

But you will have to face reality, because understanding that the world is still fair is the key to unlocking your full potential.