5 misconceptions that prevent us from being happy

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Just a few wrong thoughts can poison our lives. Lifehacker has collected five common misconceptions, getting rid of which you will become happier.

1. Life is made up of "good" and "bad"

People call good what they like, and bad what they deny or do not understand. Wasting your life thinking or arguing about what is good and what is bad is a pointless exercise.

“Right” or “wrong” are just judgments. What is acceptable for one person is categorically unacceptable for another. Do not seek to give everything an unambiguous assessment. Acting within the framework of categorical representations, you deprive yourself of the shades of life, making your world exclusively black and white.

Decide for yourself whether your behavior is effective or ineffective in terms of legitimate goals, and act on that decision.

If someone is trying to prove you are wrong, just ask, "What harm am I doing to others with my lifestyle or outlook on the world?" If you do not get a reasoned answer, it means that you have just touched someone's (one of thousands) idea of good and bad.

2. Happiness must be earned

A common misconception that leads to constant dissatisfaction. Many people believe that happiness must be earned by completing the points of an unknown list. One day all the boxes will be checked and happiness will come. In the meantime, something is missing: a brilliant career, an exemplary family, eternal love or a suitcase of money.

It is important to understand that everyone is born with the right to be happy and that this does not require special achievements.

No external conditions guarantee a serene life and satisfaction.

Find your happiness within yourself, in the little things that bring joy, in the work that is satisfying. And allow yourself to enjoy yourself now, without regard to your own merits.

3. People are divided into lucky and losers

If you think that you’re chasing failure, and others are simply more fortunate, then you are trapped in a dangerous delusion.

Failure is not a sign that something is wrong with you. The brightest, most productive, and happiest people fail too. The main thing is not to put negative labels on yourself and keep working.

Be careful with any negative statements about yourself: they can develop into complexes or create emotional blocks.

Remember to separate your personality and activities. Failure is just a mistake in a job or relationship, not an indicator of your failure.

4. Don't disappoint others

Living with an eye on other people is a thankless task. Try to spend at least a week trying to please everyone. This will most likely exhaust you terribly.

Whatever you do, some will like it and some will not. Consider constructive comments, if necessary - ask for advice. But don't spend your life trying to fit into other people's standards or not offend anyone.

Does it matter what your relatives think of your partner? What is the point of choosing a profession based only on the wishes of the parents? You will not receive any bonuses by meeting other people's expectations. Just spend time on things you don't care about and people you don't like.

5. A happy person is always in a good mood

While magazines and books advise to be “positive,” this does not mean that we must be in a good mood 24 hours a day. Life would not be life without conflict, anger, dislike, fear and sadness. You can educate your character so that these feelings do not become destructive, but you do not need to try to completely eliminate all negative experiences from life.

Feelings, like other things in life, are labeled. Joy is good, anger is bad. In fact, all emotions are of equal importance. You should not strive to drive them inside, wearing a mask of always good mood.

Become aware of your emotions, live them, ask yourself questions, spill your thoughts on paper. Find a place for sadness and joy. It is not for nothing that the Indians say: "There will be no rainbow in the soul if there were no tears in the eyes."