10 signs that you've outgrown friendship

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

This can be difficult to admit, but it is necessary.

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Surely some of your friends have not changed at all from the moment they met, and someone has turned into a different person. This is neither good nor bad, just a statement of fact. But friendship is a relationship that involves at least two people. And if all this time you were moving in different directions, then the ending will be predictable. Here are some signs that communication will soon dwindle.

1. You stopped understanding each other

When people communicate a lot and are on the same wavelength, relationships become overgrown with internal jokes and phrases. You understand each other well, and there is practically no doubt who meant what. And then there comes a time when this ability is lost and conflicts begin due to misinterpretations. You do not listen to your comrade's arguments because they are no longer clear to you.

A friendly understanding on the verge of telepathy has been formed over the years. And it also collapses for a long time. If you find this, it means that you have been moving in different directions for a long time.

2. You no longer have anything in common

It's normal for friends to have different interests. It's even useful for relationships: you can enjoy one thing together and share interesting information about others. But there should be points of contact, and there are many - something has brought you together.

If there are no intersections left and you are tormented every time trying to come up with a general leisure activity or a topic for conversation, somewhere your paths diverged.

3. You don't tell your friend about important events in your life

When something meaningful happens, the usual impulse is to share it with loved ones. So you can enjoy together, get support or good advice. But if your friend is not on the list of such people and you never rush to him with news, then you no longer need this person.

4. You are uncomfortable with a friend

Once upon a time you felt free and at ease with a person, but now everything is not so. You have to monitor your behavior so as not to say or do too much, because you are afraid that the reaction will be negative. Isn't it more like a conversation with a stranger than with a friend? The regression in the relationship is obvious.

5. You do not seek to communicate with a friend

You do not see each other for weeks, you rarely correspond, but this does not bother you at all. Previously, you exchanged messages in the messenger more or less regularly, the communication continued organically. Now, in order to resume it, some efforts have to be made. For example, come up with topics for conversation, because you have not chatted for a long time and you should write. It is necessary, but not desirable.

6. Communication in general has ceased to give pleasure

Until recently, you were anticipating common parties, but now you perceive them as a kind of obligation. If you have several events scheduled for the same day, meeting with a friend will not become a priority. Rather, you are happy to use something else as an excuse for not seeing each other. Your desires here speak for themselves.

7. A friend pulls you back

You try to develop, set goals for yourself. But instead of support, you get only sticks in the wheels from a friend. For example, let's say you signed up for a gym and go there three times a week. And your friend makes all the appointments on the training days, does not want to postpone them in any way, and even takes offense in case of refusal. All of this is starting to look like sabotage, not a mere coincidence.

It doesn't matter if you become a great athlete or excel at something else. The difference in the approaches themselves is important: you are ready to grow, and a friend cannot even admit the thought of your growth.

eight. You have no idea who the friend is talking to other than you

You don't have to have an identical social circle. But intersections are usually inevitable. You should at least be aware of who the friend spends time with and how his interests change depending on this. If for you the life of a person outside of your meetings is a continuous dark spot, you have not been very interested in it for a long time.

9. You don't think highly of people like your friend

Sometimes we look at our friends through rose-colored glasses and do not notice in them habits or characteristics that we do not accept in other people. For example, you are sure that drinking every Friday is not a desire to relax, but a stage of alcohol addiction. At the same time, your friend's main entertainment is hanging out with alcohol in garages. But you think: "So what, this is Sanya, he's just having fun!"

A closer look reveals a curious thing. Perhaps you managed to keep some common interests. But your life values differ. And this is already serious, and rose-colored glasses should not prevent you from noticing this.

10. You wouldn't be friends if you met now

Often people communicate out of inertia, because of nostalgic feelings or a stereotype that an old friend is better than two new ones. But here's the simplest test: if you met this person now, would you have a chance of becoming comrades? Would you like to spend time together? If not, you have long outgrown this friendship.