"Start with yourself" is an unpopular idea that can change a lot

This idea has a bad reputation

The phrase "Always start with yourself" automatically contorts the face. She set her teeth on edge, because she is used as a synonym for the expression "Why are you climbing where they don't ask, watch yourself." In this sense, there is really little meaning in it, and it is not surprising that it is annoying.

This is a way to shift responsibility away from those who have to solve some problems in their position. Do the hospital attendants and nurses treat the patient like a log without financial gratitude? Have you not cleaned the entrance for several months? Did the money from the budget go into someone's pockets? “Start with yourself,” the advisers say, and it sounds as strange as possible.

Medical staff, management company, officials and many other people are obliged to carry out their work in accordance with the norms and without corruption. There are no exceptions here. Small salary, the speed with which people litter, and the worldview "Would you steal if you were in his place?" don't make any difference.

Also, “Start with yourself” implies that you are doing nothing to solve the problem. The meaning is the same as the question "Have you already stopped drinking cognac in the morning?" - getting out of the situation without excuses will not work, and this puts you in a vulnerable position. But you have nothing to make excuses for.

A call to start with yourself from the outside usually does not bode well. But internal impulses have a lot of chances to be successful.

It is important to learn the art of small steps

We have sorted out the shifting of responsibility, but even without it, there are still many weak points in the idea of starting with oneself. For example, it is obvious that if you stop using sprays, the ozone hole will not be healed. Or, say, you feel sorry for the animals and decided not to buy fur, but do not find the strength to give up meat and leather goods.

There is no need to try to grasp the immensity. No one expects heroic deeds from you (and if so, then you do not have to live up to expectations). Any action, and in some cases even inaction, matters.

Black American Rosa Parks simply refused to give up her seat on the bus to a white man. And Dorothy Counts dared to transfer to a white school, although she could not study there for more than a week due to bullying and humiliation. At first glance, these not so large-scale steps have gone down in history and have become important elements in the struggle against racial segregation. They prove that a lot will change if everyone starts with themselves.

Allow yourself to make the effort you can.

Someone builds shelters, someone writes articles, someone talks about the problems of concern to their loved ones, someone does not do evil - all this is already a lot. And that's why.

You are not alone

Even people with great oddities find like-minded people. If you see a global problem and try to deal with it, there are probably those in the world who are in solidarity with you. You cannot do it alone, but together you make a significant contribution.

You still change the world, even if around you

If you start with yourself, the changes are obvious to those around you. Someone will find you strange, and someone will take an example from you.

Not all dubious things in the world are done from evil, some are simply out of ignorance. Arguing with opponents is often pointless. But it is in your power to lure over to your side those who are simply not aware of the problem.

Your conscience will be clear

Once you are sincerely imbued with some idea, there is no turning back. Of course, you can reassure yourself that your efforts do not solve anything. But the feeling of guilt is no longer going anywhere, and it can be great to poison existence.

Yes, you can't clear the ocean of debris if you just start packing fruit in reusable bags. But at least your plastic bags won't be in the water.

One person's efforts matter

Why it is important to start with yourself

In psychology, there is such a term as the bystander effect. The more people are near the scene, the fewer of them are trying to help. Everyone hopes that someone else will do it.

The effect was first described in connection with the murder of Kitty Genovese. The crime was committed in front of the residents of an apartment building for half an hour. The killer stabbed the girl, but he was frightened off by the cry of one of the neighbors. The wounded Kitty crawled into the courtyard, where she was later found and finished off by the criminal.

It is believed that one of the neighbors still called the police, but could not describe the situation correctly. As a result, help arrived at the call of a person who was not even a witness. One of the neighbors called two of his friends for advice on what to do. A friend contacted an acquaintance, and he already called the police. Patrolmen arrived after the second attack, and Kitty died in the ambulance.

This is not the only case. Just think how many people you know actually call the police when they hear cries for help outside the window or in the apartment next door.

If we are not talking about global problems - world peace or the salvation of marine life - your actions can actually change everything. And it's not just about situations where someone's life and health are at stake. If anyone can do something good, why not you.

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At the same time, you must not forget about yourself

It is not only the world that needs care, but you too. As they say on the plane, in case of depressurization of the cabin, put on the mask first on yourself, then on the child, otherwise you will suffocate and will not be able to help him.

In life, everything is the same: if you do not have the resource to save the world, you will not do anything. Therefore, you should start by helping yourself.

Sounds selfish, but there is nothing wrong with that. Healthy selfishness allows you to find a balance between your interests and the interests of other people, which makes everyone win.