7 lists to help you manage your life

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

In the race to be productive, it's easy to forget that it's not just a to-do list that can be made. He is only responsible for our actions. It is possible and necessary to make lists for each of the logical levels. Let's take a look at each of these lists.

In 2012, I conducted trainings. At a time management seminar, one of the participants complained:

My to-do list doesn't work. It allows you to clearly define what needs to be done. However, this is not enough. I plan goals, break them down into sub-tasks, set deadlines, prescribe specific steps … and don't take them. I have not been able to cross out the task for half an hour for a month now. Does it happen with you? I accuse myself of procrastination, make my to-do list again, and then fail again. How can we break this vicious circle?

Another listener commented, "You just go and do the items in order." However, everyone present, including myself, had similar problems. I'm sure you have them too. Then I supplemented the lecture with the can-do and to-be lists. We will talk about them and not only today.

To-do list problems

There are always problems with completing a to-do list. Either the priorities are wrong, or there is not enough time to complete all the tasks, or the external circumstances have changed. Nastya Raduzhnaya has already written about why to-do lists do not work. Therefore, I will not describe the reasons in detail, but simply give a list of them:

• Lack of motivation.
• Striving to fulfill a specific to-do point ideally at the expense of others.
• Fear that we won't succeed.
• Fear that the task will work out. As a result, you will then have to repeat it over and over again.
• You are not a robot achiever, but only a human.

Each of these issues goes deeper than Just do it. “Just do it” is the slogan of Nike, as David Allen says in his GTD, the seminar participant also advised. Personally, this slogan is enough for a couple of points from the to-do list, and then again I stumble over the usual problems. I have a fear of failure or motivation problems.

A bit of psychology

The problems described above are not in the field of productivity, but in the field of psychology. She is a dark whirlpool only for those who are not interested in her. Six years ago, in an NLP course, I was told about the pyramid of logical levels. It was invented by Robert Dilts, and it looks like this:

To apply the pyramid in NLP, it is suggested to use the following questions:

• Who and what surrounds me?
• What am I doing in this environment?
• What abilities do I use?
• What do I believe in doing this?
• Who do I feel myself, who am I?
• Why am I exactly like this?

The answers to the last questions are usually upsetting. By replacing them with those that motivate, you can change the answers to the former. We climb the pyramid to understand why we live. Going down, we preserve this knowledge, strive to change our environment, to make our actions filled with meaning. This is hard psychological work.

Robert Dilts, like the other creators of NLP, was primarily a psychotherapist. I don't want to dig into my psyche every day with the help of a therapist or one of their methods. Moreover, I do not urge you to do this. Our brain should work like a clock, and we do not climb inside a clock to start it. Therefore, simple and effective methods of maintaining motivation, dealing with fears are needed, and the devil knows what problems are happening in our soul. Need the same simple tool, as a to-do list. It should solve the problem when you cannot check the box next to a simple task.

Lists

It turns out that this tool has been around for a long time. His name is a list. In the race to be productive, it's easy to forget that you can make not only a to-do list … He is only responsible for our actions. You can and should make lists for each of the logical levels … Let's take a look at each of these lists.

1. List of friends, relatives, pleasant acquaintances

These people make up our immediate environment or can become one. I look at this list in between. A three-minute call to an old friend is great for recuperating between items on a to-do list. If you are afraid to talk, then send a message. Your loved ones will be pleased that you think of them.

It is useful to look into this list when planning your vacation, so that you have company. Yes, yes, yes, you also need to plan your vacation. It was not I who said this, but Gleb Arkhangelsky.

2. Wish-list

List of wishes for the material world. Don't confuse it with a shopping list or long-term goals like buy a car / build a house. The most rarely used of all my lists. I just have a list of links. Application: give to friends before the holiday or see at the end of the month what to spend part of the earned. Sometimes you should indulge yourself with what you don't need, but just want to.

3. Can-do list

Can-do is a list of your options. By composing it in a specific situation, we reduce our anxiety. For example, on the first day of work, no one knows what to do. There are no tasks, there is only the fear of not coping with them. Having made a list of can-dos, you will know exactly what you can do. Getting to know colleagues, setting up a work computer - these are a couple of items from this list.

4. List of skills

A skill-list, or skill-list, is a list of the abilities that you want to be different with. Abilities need to be maintained in the right shape. For example, if you want to be able to take pictures, then you need to not only learn this, not only keep your camera in good working order, but also do it regularly.

If you want to speak English, speak. There is no point in writing a “learn English” to-do list when you don’t have a need for this skill.

5. List of values

A mentally healthy person will not have a list in the form of abstract phrases: "health", "career", "well-being", "family". These words have long been erased by everyday use. The list of values should have vivid images that push you to move forward. For some, slogans or quotes are better, for others - pictures. If you are having trouble making such a list, then read my article three years ago. Some of my values have changed during this time. It should be so. Values change, and so do you.

6. List to-be

Most powerful of all lists. He helps in the question of self-identification, answers the question "Who am I?" You write down on the to-be list who you want to be, what roles you play every day. To clarify, we are talking about social roles that “be, not seem”.

If you have a “son” item on your list, then your parents will hear your voice on the phone or at the front door. The item "good specialist" will remind you to enter the phrase "Read a new book" in the to-do, and you will actually read it.

You will find how to combine all the desired roles, or cross out those that you do not need. For example, "pickup" disappeared from my list. It was imposed by the desire to understand women. The items "good family man" and "loving husband" supplanted him.

To combine items to-be, you can use a time limit. Being a writer for two hours is more motivating than writing an article for a Lifehacker in 120 minutes. Perhaps using a different setting will help you. In the office - a strict and uncompromising boss, focused on results; at home - a patient and loving family man. Many people combine different roles without realizing it. Try to do this deliberately.

7. List of long-term goals, list of your missions

The most difficult list. Many authors write about the importance of long-term goals, each speaking about them differently. And each of them forgets to focus on how important for any long-term goal, understanding in the name of what to achieve it … Without this, the goal simply will not become a reality.

Using all lists

In addition to the to-do list, I told you about seven new lists. To some, maintaining additional lists may seem like unnecessary work. Only we keep these lists and so, we just do not realize it. Our brains remember everything: a mini speaker for the iPhone, and a review of a good book on photography, and a motivating quote, and a nickname that your colleagues have awarded you. The question is whether you will trust your subconscious mind to keep these lists or will you do it consciously.

Each of these lists is reflected in our behavior, in our to-do list. I will give an example of a connection in mine:

• Long term goal: book.
• To-be: writer.
• Value: share experience, reasoning.
• Ability: write well.
• Can-do: receive feedback from readers; read books / articles in good style.
• To-do: article on Lifehacker about the triangle of life; subtract an article about to-do; finish reading W. Zisner "How to write well."
• Wish-list: bluetooth keyboard for iPad.

If your lists are interconnected, then you will have significantly fewer problems that I talked about at the beginning of the article.

Why it works

The Robert Dilts pyramid transfers motivation from the meaning of life and self-determination to concrete actions. It is extremely difficult for the brain to reconcile all levels within a few hours, as suggested by psychotherapy or NLP. Therefore, it is not possible to use Dilts' work in everyday life. Rebuilding the psyche every day is harmful - it causes unnecessary stress. But what to do, because you need constant work on yourself? To do this, it is more expedient to split life into parts in the form of different lists. Over time, you will achieve both clarity in each of them, and consistency between them.

Conclusion

To make your to-do list work, keep lists. Maintain different lists … Lead them interconnected. This will prevent you from turning into a vegetable in front of your TV or computer. This way you will not become a soulless robot deleting task after task from to-do. This way you will be the person who achieves your goals, manages your life and sees meaning in it.