Learn to love people to be happier

Why is it so hard to believe in people

Scientists from the University of Georgia have come to the conclusion that those who are inclined to trust their colleagues are more successful on the career ladder. Collective relationships determine the inner feeling of happiness and success. The question "How can I get better?" lost relevance. On the agenda is the question "How can I see the good in people?" Optimism promotes success and satisfaction in work and personal life. However, people are afraid to look overly optimistic.

It is very difficult to believe in another person. It starts in childhood: don't talk to strangers, keep your emotions to yourself, and always expect a catch. Trusting people on the Internet is even more dangerous: there are deceit and trolls all around. A person who trusts everyone is called a simpleton behind his back. If we find someone pleasant to talk to, we automatically underestimate their competence.

The reasons for the alertness are commonplace. First, the human brain remembers bad things. This mechanism is essential for survival, including in a social environment. All cases of betrayal are imprinted in the memory. But when trust led to good, we hardly remember.

Secondly, everyone wants to look their best against the background of others. Therefore, it is much more convenient to consider others as worse than they really are. And if they are worse, then they should not be trusted.

People consider their own motivation to be correct: "I work well because I love my job." The motivation of others is diminished: "Others are doing well because they are being paid to do it."

Chip Heath Bestselling Author and Lecturer at the Graduate School of Business at Stanford University

"Help yourself" is not our option

The benefits of trusting others are especially noticeable at work. Team conflicts are inevitable. The “ladder of assumptions” works against us: climbing upward, out of neutral information, we inflate a pessimistic elephant, which immediately settles on our neck. As a result, we think badly of others. If you receive, for example, a letter from a colleague with whom you do not have a very good relationship, you are more likely to think negatively about him and his motives.

The best advice I have been given is to think positively and have good intentions.

Indra Nooyi is an American entrepreneur, chairman of the board of directors and CEO of PepsiCo

You are part of society

Growth opportunities at work depend on how we perceive and respond to help. It often happens that the desire to improve the team's work is suppressed due to the fear of being misunderstood. If a manager initially accepts subordinates as a group of professionals who are ready to learn and become better, the level of success of the entire department rises sharply.

The ability to influence others is one of the most valuable skills in career advancement. If we consider others to be capable and intelligent, our own lives are improved. If we are convinced that others are difficult to move from their place, we do not try to convince them - why waste energy?

This is how personal beliefs are formed and confirmed: think badly of a person, and he will definitely confirm your thoughts. Psychology books focus on ourselves, which indirectly reduces the value of the world around us and negatively affects the ability to build positive relationships with others, with society. Meanwhile, we are all part of it. Therefore, it is important to believe in people and treat them with respect.