7 "bad" personality traits that you don't need to fight

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

These qualities can make life difficult for those around you, but yours will definitely be made better.

1. Stubbornness

The words "You are stubborn" are difficult to mistake for a compliment. Usually they are pronounced by a person who is exhausted, unsuccessfully trying to convince you. It seems that you should immediately feel ashamed, but you shouldn't.

Stubbornness is different. If you say “no” out of harm in a situation where it is more profitable and more correct to say “yes”, then, indeed, it is worth thinking about it. You need to figure out why it is more important for you to go against the speaker than to act rationally.

But more often than not, stubbornness does not harm you, but helps.

Remember when in childhood they tried to feed you with semolina porridge, but you did not open your mouth, cried, spat it out. So you showed that you do not want to eat porridge. In adulthood, they try to "feed" you with worse things: injustice, unnecessary responsibilities, and so on. It makes sense that your opponent would like it better if you chewed silently. But you have grown and can fight back. So stubbornness only helps you defend your boundaries.

2. Indifference

Indifference has become a trend, and that's a good thing. People actively defend their views, support the offended, speak out against the guilty, donate money to charity. And they still get reproaches. “You say that you stand up for the rights of political prisoners, but you don’t want to publish an announcement about a homeless animal,” the society tells us and enlists in the ranks of the callous and heartless.

In fact, if you take everything to heart, you can go crazy. There is too much injustice, pain, suffering in the world. Just open any news feed. If you let every message go through you, there is little left of you. The ability to remain indifferent and healthy cynicism help to defend against the surrounding reality.

Being an activist is good and right, but only when you have the strength to do it.

3. Emotionality

In the Russian mentality there is a kind of cult of the stone face. It would be understandable if only emotions that are considered negative were condemned - anger, resentment, fear. But it is not accepted to demonstrate joy either. This is embedded even in proverbs and sayings: "You laughed a lot - you will cry a lot", "Laughter for no reason is a sign of foolishness." Emotional people have been distracted from childhood, especially boys.

But it is obvious that a person has emotions for a reason. Moreover, they are not divided into good and bad, it is just a response to external events and internal insights. Of course, it's good to understand your reactions and manage them - for example, to contain anger when communicating with a client. But sorting out feelings is very difficult if you never give yourself the right to be emotional.

Moreover, if emotions are suppressed for too long, they will still find a way out - only by amplifying them many times over. Or they will start to destroy you from the inside.

So let yourself cry over the pitiful movie, laugh at the YouTube videos and get angry at the person who drove through the puddle and poured water over you from head to toe.

4. Conflict

It's good to be calm, non-conflict and everyone likes it. For example, a person took your place in the cinema - is it difficult for you to change seats. The cashier didn’t give the change, but it’s just a penny. A colleague went on vacation and outweighed matters with last week's deadline on you - but you won't ruin the relationship. In general, everyone around is good when you are calm and non-conflict.

But when you are ready to openly enter into confrontation, you sit in the place that you have chosen, do not do their work for others, and you feel pretty good.

5. Immodesty

From childhood, we are taught not to protrude. It is believed that no one at school likes upstarts. So, if you have learned a lesson or have some talent, do not show it until they force you: they call you to the blackboard or ask you to sing. And then we carry it all over into adulthood and silently wait for the boss to notice our good work and raise our pay. And if someone praises us, we instantly devalue the compliment:

- Oh, you draw so well.

- Come on, it's just a daub.

No one else will call you through the magazine to find out that you have learned the lesson better than anyone else.

Everyone has talents and strengths. Knowing them and not being afraid to talk about them is an important skill that will make your life better.

6. Laziness

“You’re just too lazy” is a convenient phrase to force someone (or yourself) to do what you don’t want to do without any explanation or motivation. The word "laziness" settled down next to its brother "must". But sometimes, instead of being ashamed and overcoming, it's better to stop and think.

You may be lazy because the action seems meaningless to you. For example, you bought a dishwasher and a robot vacuum cleaner, and all older relatives now consider you an 80th level bummer. Or you sabotage the case because it was imposed on you against your will. Or have already done their part of the work faster than anyone else and do not want to help anyone - you have the right.

Finally, laziness can be a good indicator that you are tired, burned out, or depressed. If nothing else pleases you and you barely have enough energy to watch TV shows in bed, this is a serious symptom. By self-flagellation, you will only make it worse.

So you don't need to fight laziness (you need to be able to rest). But it's better to listen to her.

7. Meticulousness

People who want to get to the bottom of everything, to figure out the details, to get to the bottom of it, are often accused of being boring. But meticulousness is good for you personally and for society.

Let's say you can just take out a mortgage. Or you can first think about a strategy for its repayment and develop several plans depending on how your financial condition changes. In general, spread the straws and do not worry. Or you can lend a large amount of debt only against receipt (even to a friend). It seems like a formality, but it will be easier to return your money.

And also meticulous people are orderlies of the intellectual forest. It often happens: someone in the company is blatantly heresy, referring to "some research." There is a great risk that this data will spread further: “Have you heard, the Earth is flat! Yes, scientists have proven! " Only that meticulous person can save the situation. It is he who will not take the word for granted, google the information, double-check it against authoritative sources, and then also tell the terrible truth to everyone present.

If meticulousness is a character trait, cherish it. If you do not have it, try to be more attentive to details, at least where it is critical.