What to do if your child is addicted to video games

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

The main rule is not to scold or forbid.

I lead online programming and video blogging groups for children aged 7-10. At this age, many children get stuck in games, since by the beginning of school life, parental control weakens, and the influence of peers, on the contrary, increases. If your child is under seven years old, this article will help you prepare for this period. If you are older, look back and assess which tips are not too late to apply.

I have disaccustomed about 1,000 children, and about half of the students who come are children who are already addicted to games. All recommendations from this article have been tested both on personal experience of upbringing and in communication with these children and their parents.

First, let's find out if the child has such an addiction:

1. He stays up late for games, does not get enough sleep, knocks down the normal daily routine.
2. The time allotted for play is limited, but the child constantly asks for "supplements".
3. Learning suffers because of games. The student does his homework in a hurry in order to quickly start playing, and this affects the grades, for example, an excellent student has unexpected triplets.
4. Interests in other areas are dwindling. The child gives up all previous hobbies, stops walking.

So, we have a child who is ready to play until the mouse is taken away. What can a parent do?

1. Do not scold. Do not prohibit. Do not make a scandal

A child playing will probably annoy you. Even if you let him play, you will be tempted to make a remark like "Why are you only killing for this time!" This is a deliberately losing tactic: it will not diminish interest in the game, and spoil the relationship between an adult and a child.

In my Scratch programming lesson, I had a student Lev, who was literally obsessed with playing Shadow Fight. He was so immersed in it that even in class he tried to get his phone and play. The first few lessons I struggled: I asked to turn off and even leave the classroom for 5 minutes. But nothing helped: the boy was swallowed up by the game.

So I decided to go the other way and suggested making the whole group a fighting game on Scratch. For several lessons, the children drew their characters, did the voice acting, looked for pictures on the Internet - the process completely captured the children. A month later, the homemade Shadow Fight was ready. And to my surprise, Leo easily switched to creating another game. So we overcame his "hang" on this topic.

This is my teacher's observation, but you can use the same technique as a parent. Pressurized entry and prohibition will not work. This will only create a wall between you and the child, and the older he is, the faster this wall will grow.

If the child is already playing, the last thing you need to do is to drip lectures on his brains, take away the computer and change passwords.

2. Make a clear agreement on the time for games

Well, you can't swear and argue. And then what to do? Your job as a parent is to set rules for your child when and how to play. The easiest way is to agree on the duration of the game: for example, 1 hour a day at the home computer.

To avoid situations like “I didn't know that an hour had already passed, so I continued to play”, teach your child to set an alarm on the phone or start an online timer. As a child, I used the kitchen timer, which rang throughout the apartment, notifying that it was time to free the computer. My kids use the OnlineTimer website. They do not play, but any work on the computer in our family is limited: an 8-year-old child is entitled to 25 minutes, an 11-year-old child - 40 minutes. When the timer rings, you need to take a break.

I advise you to supplement the agreement with the following condition:

• “… If the lessons for tomorrow are done”;
• "… if mom or dad allowed it";
• “… If the room is in order”;
• "… if the dishes are washed" and the like.

However, do not include all household chores in your contract, otherwise it will look like a fairy tale about Cinderella, who was allowed to go to the ball after an impossible amount of work. What is more important to you? Tomorrow's lessons, combined with your permission, may be suitable for children who are in school. Order in the house - for those who study at home.

And be sure to agree on the "magic phrase" with other adults - spouse, grandmother. The rules should be understood by everyone in the same way, so that there is no such thing when a kind dad comes tired from work and permits everything, as long as the children are left behind.

Sometimes things don't go according to plan:

• Guests came to the child, and they sat down to play together for 3 hours.
• The child plays with friends, then comes home and plays his allowed hour.
• Plays on a smartphone at school.
• I forgot to start the timer and played for 2 hours without getting up.

In this case, the first thing to remember is advice number one: do not scold, do not forbid, do not scandal. Understand, is this a one-time failure or your contract with the child is not drawn up well? It is normal practice to revise the rules and re-approve them.

3. Suggest useful computer hobbies

Often, children who are "hung up" on games have a pronounced technical mindset. Offer your child modern computer hobbies.

Computer game programming

In my experience, this option is best suited for tightly hung ones. Scratch is a good option for beginners. It is a visual environment where children learn to program by dragging and dropping blocks. The first Scratch game can be created in 20 minutes. Something more difficult - to collect in 2-3 weeks of classes. In a couple of months, you can master a good set of tools to make any game to your taste.

For children over 10 years old and with experience in creating games in Scratch, the PyGame environment is suitable for composing games in the Python language. The next step can be the formation of three-dimensional games in the Unity environment.

As you can see, this is a long-term hobby: by starting simple, you can gradually embrace more complex tools.

Video blogging

Running your own YouTube video blog is a useful computer hobby for older kids. From the age of nine, the child will be able to master the basic techniques of video editing.

The release of a video is a difficult task that improves technical (filming, editing), creative (ideas for video, staging a shot) and organizational skills. Even if the child does not regularly vlogging, it will at least become an inoculation against "freezing" in games and on YouTube.

According to YouTube rules, you can start your own channel only from the age of 13. Younger children can only post videos under your control. However, regardless of whether the child is 13 years old or not, tell him about the basic rules of online safety: do not tell anyone your address, phone number and information about parents. If you have doubts about how to respond to a comment, whether you can rent your room and what to show in the frame, have your child discuss this with you first.

Photo processing

This activity may interest the child by the fact that in social networks he will not post monotonous selfies, but beautiful retouched photographs. A good chance to stand out from the mass of identical pages and start collecting subscribers outside the circle of friends.

It is not an option to simply buy a book "Installation Basics" and give it to a child. Most likely, he will throw it right away. Therefore, choose an interesting learning format.

From experience I will say that the following things are important for children:

• Fashionable theme. Scratch programming is better than Pascal. Video blogging is more interesting than the basics of directing.
• A teacher who can captivate and does not throw boring theory.
• A group of guys - the more the better. The offline circle will have 5-10 people, the online group can have 40-50 students.
• Regular lessons. 2 hours of classes per week is the best option to keep you interested and see your progress.

4. Take care of yourself

Critically evaluate your behavior: how do you handle gadgets? It happens that we require children to get rid of the habits that we ourselves demonstrate. An alarming signal if you find yourself in one of the situations:

• Stay on the phone while eating.
• Don't go to bed without four episodes of your favorite TV show or a couple of successful raids in an online game.
• You play on your smartphone in line or at lunch in the office.

In this case, you need to deal with your gadget cravings first.

5. Change the environment of the child

If all classmates do not let go of their smartphones, there is nothing surprising depending on the games. Now imagine that your child is communicating with children who do not stick to video games, but, for example, make something. Or put together speed puzzles. Or they are making a movie. In such an environment, the child is unlikely to play: the influence of the environment is too great to stand out.

Look for a group of kids who get together at least once a week to socialize and do things together. This could be:

• An adult-led club. Not a club with a rigid schedule of classes, but a club where children can come for 2-3 hours to chat with friends and work on a joint project. For example, aeromodelling is closer in spirit to a club than a programming circle.
• The company of children for "non-computer interests": board games, puzzles, sports.
• Sport section. Unlike the first two options, here the child will be able to participate in tournaments and competitions. Team sports like hockey or soccer are great.

A big plus of the right company is that it will regulate the child itself. You do not need to persuade and monitor attendance - he himself will go to the club or section with pleasure.

6. Come up with a family hobby

It is not necessary to send your child away from home to forget about computer games. You can choose a hobby in which you will also actively participate.

The first option is hobbies at home. Something related to needlework or modeling: knitting, felting from wool, weaving from elastic bands or beads, folding origami, glueing models, soldering schemes - there are a lot of interesting activities.

The second option is joint trips and visits to museums, amusement parks, excursions. Instruct your child to search the Internet for interesting places, and take it upon yourself to organize a family event. New experiences are guaranteed.

7. Teach to cope with boredom without the help of games

Sometimes kids sit down to play video games to pass the time. I got bored - I turned on the computer and had fun. It would be nice to teach your child to find something to do without gadgets. It is difficult for him to do this himself, so help at first: "Find an interesting book on this shelf and read it together", "Choose a board game and we will play it."

This will help you take the first step in overcoming boredom. Perhaps the next time a bored child will start reading without waiting for you.

So that he does not suffer every time with the choice of an occupation, write down possible ideas for leisure activities. Take a time and make a list of things to do with your child when they get bored. For example:

• look at the old photo album;
• do agility exercises with the ball;
• go out for a walk;
• choose where to go on the weekend;
• come up with what to give mom, dad or grandfather for the next birthday;
• write a letter or call grandma.

You can arrange the list in the form of a mind map:

These were advice to the parents of children addicted to games. In short, the plan is: do not conflict, introduce time limits for games and help with choosing an alternative. Good luck and understanding to you in your family.