How to behave if a marriage is on the verge of collapse

1. Don't blame your partner for all problems

Naturally, you want your partner to see his mistakes and admit his guilt. But try to suppress the urge to blame him for all the troubles. Ask questions instead. Listen to learn and speak to express yourself. Share how you feel about the situation and ask what your significant other is experiencing. This will strengthen the feeling of closeness. Try to stay calm and focus on what else you can fix.

2. Do not criticize or insult your partner

When we feel that we cannot reach our partner and influence his decision, we often begin to speak harsh provocative words, just to prolong the argument and keep his attention. But this will only exacerbate an already tense situation. Remind yourself that you cannot control your partner's behavior and try to come to terms with it.

Take a deep breath. Before you speak, think about what you want to express. Then the desire to say something insulting and humiliating will weaken.

3. Refrain from dominant behavior and jealousy

If your partner moves away, it is natural that you want to hold him, but do not try to control his every step. Do not check who he calls and writes, do not violate personal boundaries. This is especially difficult to resist in a relationship when one of the partners cheated. But believe me, this behavior will only alienate the person even more.

Everyone wants a loved one to stay of their own accord, and not under pressure or out of a sense of duty.

4. Try to defuse the situation

Many couples on the verge of divorce are constantly in an incredibly tense emotional state, which is physically and mentally exhausting. Both sides are ready to defend themselves at the slightest provocation. The body seems to be stuck in a fight-or-flight state. At the same time, it is impossible to communicate.

In this state, it is important to defuse the situation a little. Do not build additional walls around yourself when there are already so many obstacles between you and your partner. Remember to laugh and relieve stress.

5. Don't shut yourself off emotionally

In a situation of uncertainty, you want to protect yourself, close yourself. But by hiding your emotions and refusing to share your feelings, you will not solve the problem. And restraining your feelings will only lead to nervous breakdowns or depression in the future.

When your partner says something offensive, do not close and do not withdraw into yourself, but say: "Your words hurt me." Just express how you feel without expecting it to make a difference.

Even following all the advice and doing everything “right”, it is not always possible to influence the situation. The main thing to remember when a relationship is on the verge of falling apart is that you cannot control your partner's behavior. But you can influence your own. If you choose to be kind, honest, sincere, and try to behave like an emotionally mature person, there will be more chances of saving the relationship.