How to survive at a party if you're an introvert

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

There are several ways to relieve suffering and even benefit from the situation.

Introverts do not need noisy companies, they relax alone or with close friends. But social events, parties and celebrations with crowds of people do not disappear anywhere, and no matter how hard the introvert tries, some still have to attend. Here are some tips on how to get through a noisy holiday with a bunch of people and small talk and not get only negative emotions from this experience.

Know when the worst begins

Socialization is inevitable and completely normal, even for introverts. Be that as it may, there are situations that will be beneficial for introverts, while others can be avoided without losing anything.

What can you avoid

1. Weekly get-togethers in a bar or cafe. There is a common misconception that it is often very fun and cool to relax in a crowded bar, but you can easily avoid these gatherings and find the best use of your energy.
2. Weddings, parties and other events of people you don't know very well. For some, going to your great-uncle's best friend's wedding is very cool and fun, but if you're an introvert, it's quite possible to dodge that kind of fun and no one will be offended (of course, unless you have to accompany another introvert who will be really bad without you).
3. Going somewhere to meet new people. If you are lonely and this has ceased to suit you, you need to go out somewhere to meet potential friends. If you decide to do this, great, because meeting in person is still better than texting all the time on the Internet. But if you are not ready for meetings and new acquaintances, no one forces you. Set aside the moment for as long as necessary.

What cannot be avoided

1. Events at work, corporate parties and meetings are not part of your personal life, and you will have to communicate with employees, even if you don't really like them. Of course, you can find yourself a profession that does not include communication with people, but if you still work in a team, it will be almost impossible to move up the career ladder without communication.
2. Special events for close friends and family members must-see. Whether it's your sister's wedding, your best friend's birthday, or celebrating a significant date with your family, you must come. Everyone has social obligations, even if they sometimes feel like a challenge.
3. Your personal significant events. Of course, you can do nothing at all, not collect friends, and not throw a noisy party. But it's not a fact that your friends won't want to arrange anything for you. If you organize a holiday yourself, at least you can control its size and format, which is a plus.

So, despite your dislike for noisy companies, there are still events that cannot be avoided. And here are some ways to not only not get annoyed about it, but also have some fun.

Create a goal for yourself

Goals don't seem to go very well with party fun, but if you don't already enjoy the noisy gatherings, then come up with a few quests for yourself, and you will have at least some sense of communication.

For example, if you go to a corporate party for the sake of career advancement, try to communicate with people who can help with this. If you are going to a friend's birthday, give him more attention, and if you want to diversify your social circle (or start one), choose the most attractive strangers and try to chat with them.

A specific goal will help you to clearly understand why you are in this “terrible place”. And more importantly, it helps you stay focused.

With a noisy crowd of people, introverts are attacked by a stream of external stimuli that is too much for them, which is confusing and makes them feel unhappy. If you come up with a specific goal for yourself, your brain will be focused on achieving it, and loud music, light and noise of conversations will not be so noticeable and annoying.

Relax before and after the party

Why are extroverts so fond of noisy gatherings and parties? Because they are recharged from communication with other people and a continuous stream of external stimuli. Introverts, on the other hand, restore energy alone, and spend it in society.

Before spending your energy on communication and new acquaintances, you must first acquire it. Before the event, try to stay alone for a while and do some of your favorite things: read a book, listen to music, or watch an episode of your favorite TV series.

After the party, also try to free up time for your favorite activities to recharge, and don't plan any social events the next day. If you can't avoid this, try to leave the party early so that you have a few quiet hours before bed.

This will not only help you to relax and recover, but will also allow you to change your attitude towards noisy gatherings and parties. After all, if you come from an event without the usual depression and fatigue, then you are more likely to wait for the next such event, and not be afraid of it.

Find a place to rest

Let's say you are filled with energy before the party, but this does not mean that your strength will definitely be enough for the entire event. Therefore, as soon as you arrive at the venue, find a "safe haven" for yourself, where you can hide and rest on occasion. This could be a kitchen, bathroom, balcony, or even your car.

A few minutes alone can help you take a break from the external stimuli that affect introverts so badly.

It's even easier if you are at your party. Here you can not look for a place to relax, but arrange it for yourself. For example, make the balcony or bedroom a special place for introverts, where you and people with similar behaviors can take a break.

Master a new social space with the help of friends

Not all introverts are shy, but this personality type is often combined with some communication problems, especially with new people. If you can't just get to know someone, friends can help.

For example, have an extrovert friend start a conversation with a new person, and then you join the conversation. Or in another way: you can start a conversation with a friend, and then involve strangers in your discussion.

Ask a stranger who will approach you, or someone who is listening to your conversation, what he thinks about it. This way you can talk about a topic that interests you, which is much more comfortable for an introvert than small talk about nothing.

It's good if you have a few outgoing extroverted friends. They, as a rule, do not sit for a long time in one place, constantly communicating with one group of people, but move from one company to another, making new acquaintances.

You can always use this to chat with new people or get away from those you don't like. For example, you realize that you are stuck with a person you dislike. Just say that you need to communicate with friend X. Leave, look for him, communicate with him and along the way with everyone who is with him at this time.

Accept small talk as part of life

You are unlikely to be able to meet new people without simple conversations. Obviously, you can talk for hours on topics that interest you, but most people will say that it's boring.

Small talk unites people who are quite distant from each other: who do you work, where you live, who you know, what you think about some event, and so on. All this has to be discussed before you move on to more interesting topics for you.

There is no one-size-fits-all tool that will help you conduct such conversations well, but you have to agree with their necessity. Remember two things to help you deal with these conversations more easily:

1. People are interested in you. It may seem to you that the interlocutors do not care who you are or what you do, and they ask out of courtesy. Sometimes it happens, but not always. More often than not, people are really interested when they are interested in your work or hobbies, especially if you have something in common.
2. You get what you give. You get what you put into the party. You may have to try hard to force yourself to meet new people, but in the end you will be surprised how many new acquaintances and pleasant experiences you get from it. And if someone doesn't want to talk to you, it's not your fault. You did your best.

Unless you think that you have already met all the interesting people in the world and their society is enough for the rest of your life, you should still get to know someone else.

Surely you will come across at least one interesting person. Most importantly, this person also wants you to find him, and small talk is just a way to meet and understand that you are sympathetic to each other.

Come up with a retreat plan

If your energy reserves are rapidly running out and you feel that you urgently need to dump, forcing yourself to communicate further is not the most pleasant experience.

Nevertheless, this may well happen if you, for example, come in the same car with your friends. If this is your car, you cannot leave without collecting them. It will turn out unfriendly, you will ruin their fun and, most likely, your relationship.

If this is a friend's car, it is not pleasant either. So it is better to figure out in advance how you will get home so that you can do it any time you want.

Moreover, it is not a fact that you will leave the party before everyone else, but having such an opportunity, you will feel more confident.

That's all there is for introverts about partying. Do you have your own ways to feel more comfortable at noisy events?