"How to put a girl to sleep" is a popular query in search engines. Here's what you need to know about it

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Rape and even murder can be hidden behind these words.

What kind of game?

Twitter user @SUPPORT_C_MAPCA that the search engine suggested to him as a popular query "how to put a girl to sleep, but so that she does not remember anything later."

Lifehacker checked and found out that such requests are really popular.

Some people are thus trying to find porn with the stated plot. The whole phenomenon could be attributed to peculiar cinematic tastes, but it will not work. After all, this is not the first round of discussion of the topic.

In 2016, the problem was already raised. Then the activists managed to find several thematic groups on VKontakte and threads on Dvacha, where the audience discussed how and with what to put a girl (wife, girlfriend, sister) to sleep in order to have sexual contact with her. They even complained about the VKontakte groups to tech support. But nothing was done there, as "they did not see any calls to action." Roskomnadzor found illegal content, but this, most likely, was associated with pornography, and not with discussions. The group was blocked. And in 2017, VKontakte unblocked it again.

We are talking primarily about situations when a trusted person becomes a rapist. Sometimes this can happen systematically. For example, in the UK, a man put to sleep and raped a girlfriend for two years, and posted a photo of what was happening on the Internet. The girl learned about everything from the police. A person who saw the pictures on the Web contacted the authorities.

But also do not discount those who pour drugs into drinks for strangers. Such cases are not uncommon. For example, actor Bill Cosby confessed to giving women sleeping pills for sex.

All this suggests that there is indeed a great interest in the topic of euthanasia, which means that many girls may be in danger.

Do not men suffer from this?

There are such cases, they are just less common. As a rule, we are talking about a crime on the part of a stranger. A man in a heterosexual relationship practically does not have to wait for a trick from a partner due to physiological characteristics. But anything can happen. Therefore, everything written is also true for cases when a man becomes a victim.

Is it normal at all to want to put someone to sleep?

Of course no. To secretly add drugs and potent substances to an adult and capable person is, in principle, a dubious idea, no matter what motives move those who do it. The “addressee” must be aware of what is happening and give consent, because no one has the right to interfere in his relationship with his body. In addition, the sprinkler may not be aware of any contraindications and allergies. There is also a great risk of not guessing with the dose, and this is fraught with unpleasant consequences, including death.

The remark about adulthood and legal capacity is not accidental. It happens that parents need to be tricky to give medicine to their child. Or an older relative with dementia refuses to take the pills. In this case, you can cheat. But only if the drug was prescribed by a doctor and in the dosage indicated by him - without initiative.

Is the desire for sex with a sleeping person normal?

The word "rape" has already been mentioned in this text many times, it is not accidental. Let's call a spade a spade. When it comes to a dormant person, this is not sex at all.

In general, there are people who do not mind being woken up in the middle of the night for sexual purposes. There are those who hate it. Therefore, the issue must be discussed in advance in order to understand how the partner as a whole relates to this. But there is a key difference here: a person is able to wake up from touch and get involved in the process or refuse it.

If someone is put to sleep, there are no options. This is rape, even if the partners are romantically involved or married. Having once agreed to have sex, a person does not give life-long consent to have it repeated. Moreover, this does not mean a willingness to engage in any form of sexual intercourse.

In general, the aggressors understand this: it is not for nothing that a search query is often accompanied by the words “so that she does not wake up” and “so that she does not remember anything”.

Violence begins where the partner's personality ceases to exist for a person. Where the opinion of the second is not asked and is not taken into account, where there is no mutual desire. Dominance, spanking, being tied up, being tough are the norm only when there is an agreement between the two people. Any sexual practice is permissible and is not considered a pathology as long as it brings pleasure to both participants in the process.

As for the situation with the euthanasia, it is easy to guess that the girl's personality ceases to exist for such men. They perceive it exclusively as an object to satisfy their fantasies and desires. This is the most real violence and perversion.

What's wrong with people trying to put a girl to sleep for sex?

According to Kristina Kostikova, the excitement to the immobilized body itself is a pathology. Emotional contact with a partner is completely absent here, any intimacy. In fact, the partner himself is absent.

Christina Kostikova

Sex with a lulled girl can be compared to the death drive. An extreme sexual fantasy in this vein will already be necrophilia. Although, in fact, a lulled person is not much different in sex from a deceased person.

If we look deeply, then sexual behavior is one of the varieties of our manifestation of ourselves in life. It is influenced by childhood traumas, personality structure, defense mechanisms that the psyche uses.

Kristina Kostikova suggested that among young people who put girls to sleep and rape them, two categories can be distinguished:

1. Real paraphiles - those who, on a mental level, have a deviation in sexual preferences. Often, rapists themselves were victims in childhood. It was not necessarily a physical impact - perhaps they faced abuse from their parents, humiliation, insults, devaluation.

People with mental disabilities in the sexual sphere have too little internal censor. They do not see the boundaries of the norm.

Reproducing violence, mentally they are already identified with the active position - the position of the rapist. By doing so, they try to stop feeling the pain they already suffered when they were a victim. But this is a dead-end strategy, so the violence cannot stop because the abuser's unconscious goal will not be achieved.

2. Followers. Such people, most likely, do not have mental problems. But they have very weak internal supports, a lot of fear and self-doubt as a man. They are afraid of rejection or generally not popular with girls. And then they come across a discussion about falling asleep and inner despair and disappointment make them resort to such a thing.

Of course, all of the above does not justify any group of people who decide to put themselves to sleep for sex.

How to protect yourself from sleep rape?

It's a little easier with strangers and unfamiliar people. Here are the basic safety rules:

• If you order a drink at a restaurant, give preference to bottles and cans. Make sure they are opened in front of you.
• Don't leave your drink unattended in a bottle or glass, even for a second. This time is enough to pour something into it.
• Do not accept treats from unfamiliar people if you cannot follow it from the moment of preparation. The brought glass of coffee can be not only an element of care, but also a way to get you drunk.
• Keep track of the amount of alcohol you drink. The more it is, the higher the risk that you will lose your guard.
• Ask someone to insure you. He may not only have to snatch your body out of the hands of an intruder, but also call an ambulance.

If we are talking about a close and well-known person, then, alas, it is quite difficult to defend yourself. Relationships are built on trust, and it will be weird if you hide your drinks and food from your partner. Unfortunately, rapists do not usually have it written on their foreheads that they are rapists. Therefore, all you can is not to ignore suspicious things like an unusual morning state, pain, bruises and other consequences of intoxication and physical abuse.

Christina Kostikova

You can protect yourself by personal study, no matter how hackneyed it sounds. It is necessary to be attentive to your feelings when communicating with people, to hear and recognize your discomfort arising from this. Refuse when you feel that the situation is going in an uncomfortable direction for you, and even when there is a fear of sounding strange, crazy.

It is important to study yourself and your motives in the search for a relationship, so as not to settle for the first contacts that come along. You need to put yourself first, even if a man tries to persuade you to something and convinces you of something. It is worth working out your vulnerabilities - guilt, fear, inconvenience, the need to receive love from each person, the need for approval - in order to easily recognize manipulations, not succumb to any of them and return them back to the person.

Can the rapist be punished?

The Criminal Code contains articles that punish rape and sexual assault. The first includes traditional heterosexual intercourse, the second - everything else.

Another thing is that it is not so easy to attract a person with whom the victim is in a romantic relationship under these articles. The police are often reluctant to pursue such cases, even if there is compelling evidence. However, there is still a chance to achieve justice.