How to get away from an awkward question: 8 strategies with examples

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

These methods will help you gently slip out of the clutches of a tactless interlocutor or get rid of unpleasant conversations with him forever.

You can listen to this article. Play a podcast if that's more comfortable for you.

1. Answer a question to a question

Use the weapon of the interlocutor and interrogate him with passion. For example, ask why he is asking and what will change your answer.

If you keep friendly intonations, the degree of rudeness in this method is practically zero. At the same time, you squeeze the questioner from your territory back to neutral. With luck, the person will understand that the question is tactless.

- Are you going to buy an apartment at all, or are you going to live in a rented apartment until old age?

- Will my answer affect anything? Or why are you interested?

2. Transform the question

An inconvenient topic can be directed in the right direction if you clarify the subject of the conversation before starting to answer. It is important to navigate quickly so that the interlocutor does not have time to bring you back.

- Is there a groom, or will you die surrounded by cats?

- Do you mean that cats scare away grooms? What are you, my cats are very friendly, because I took them from a shelter. By the way, I advise you, a cat will always come in handy on the farm. Moreover, the cats from the shelter are so grateful.

3. Pour water

Answer verbatim not to the question asked, but to a very close one, keeping the main subject of the conversation unchanged. The method does not give one hundred percent guarantee, since the interlocutor may not be so easily confused, but it works. At least for politicians.

If nothing comes to mind, start answering the question from afar. Until you get to the point, the topic fades away by itself.

- Why haven't you been promoted yet? You have been working in this place for a very long time.

- As a child, I always looked at adults who came back from work in the evening, and thought that one day I was going to have it too. Then it seemed to me that this was great, because at work you do not need to sleep and eat semolina. What a fatal mistake!..

4. Ask for advice

If you need to distract the other person, give him the opportunity to talk about what he (in his opinion) understands. Ask for advice and listen carefully to the answer.

Just do not in any way ask questions related to the main topic of the conversation. If you ask, for example, how to find a spouse, in response to the question why you are not married, then you risk each meeting to report how the search is progressing. So switch your interlocutor to the most abstract topic.

- Will you look for a normal job or will you freelance?

- So far, I'm concerned about repairs. By the way, you recently moved the floor in the rooms. Is it really possible to cover the floor with a board now, or is it worth it like a cast-iron bridge? What have you chosen? And why?

5. laugh it off

If you are not a sparkling stand-up comedian, it is better to prepare in advance. The annoying questions are usually the same, so you can come up with a witty answer for each and give it out every time someone steps on the slippery soil of tactlessness.

- Why don't you have children?

- You know, I ask myself all the time, why don't I have children. But in the end I can't agree with myself, I quarrel and even stop talking to myself. Apparently, we will have to wait a little longer, otherwise we will have to part with ourselves on this basis.

6. Be clear about your dissatisfaction

There are questions that annoy you, but generally decent, and there are frankly tactless ones. And if we are talking about the latter option, take courage and outline the boundaries of what is permitted so that your words cannot be interpreted ambiguously.

- Do you look bad, are you sick of something?

“I doubt this question is appropriate. I am ready to discuss the state of health only with the attending physician.

7. Ignore the question

This option will require some acting skills from you. Continue the conversation as if you haven't heard the question. When the other person repeats it, continue to bend your line. Sooner or later he will get bored.

If it seems to you that you will not be able to cope, move away from the question in the literal sense of the word. Tell him you need to go away for a minute. Come back with a prepared topic for conversation.

- When will you finally marry Masha?

- Excuse me for a second.

- Have you watched the last Tarantino film?

8. Mirror someone else's tactlessness

You, of course, are a well-mannered person and do not want to be rude in response to unsolicited questions. But some people, in their manifestations of curiosity, do not give up even after having tried all the previous methods. In this case, a little aggression doesn't hurt.

True, it is better not to look for the vulnerability of the interlocutor in order to hit harder - why should you sink to his level? He himself gives you a weapon - his own question. Just return it in a formulation that will bring the questioner to clean water.

- When will you have a normal haircut?

- Do I understand correctly that you consider my haircut unsuccessful and think that I should adapt to your taste, and not to mine?