Why you shouldn't share your goals with others

Praise sometimes gets in the way

The last name of the Wright brothers is the first that comes to mind today when the conversation about the birth of aviation begins. However, at one time they were considered outsiders. At one time, most Americans supported the astronomer and physicist Samuel Langley.

He was considered an authority and spoke out loud about his ambitions. Nevertheless, it was the brothers who managed to make the first manned flight, and the famous scientist failed.

Perhaps the Wrights' victory can be attributed to their passion for work, intrinsic motivation and lack of praise. While Langley was lauded for ambitious plans and accomplishments he had yet to accomplish, the brothers were ignored.

When we are praised for our intention, it seems to us that we have already won. This reduces the likelihood that we will continue to strive towards the goal.

Psychologist Peter Gollwitzer writes about this. According to his research P. M. Gollwitzer, P. Sheeran, V. Michalski, A. E. Seifert. When Intentions Go Public: Does Social Reality Widen the Intention-Behavior Gap? / Psychological Science, communicating to others about a goal that is closely related to our identity reduces the likelihood of achieving it.

For example, you want to drink more water and tell your friends and family about it. It is unlikely that this will significantly affect the result, because aspiration is not related to your idea of yourself.

But if your goal is to lose 20 kg, it is better not to write about it on social networks. After talking about your intention and getting praise for it, you will already feel successful and give up the undertaking.

You can increase your chances of success

Define your fears

Entrepreneur, writer and investor Tim Ferris advises to first understand what fears might stand in your way to your goal.

Let's say you want to start a business. Write down the concerns associated with this. For example: losing all your money, losing your main job, becoming a laughing stock in the eyes of others.

Then consider how you can prevent these events or reduce the likelihood of them occurring. For example, for the first fear: "I will invest only X thousand, so I will not lose everything." And at the end, write down what you will do if your fears still become reality.

For example, to recover the lost amount, you will temporarily work as a bartender. In this way, you will get rid of the fears that hold you back on the path to the goal.

Surround yourself with competitors

Scientists recently tested how competition affects the achievement of goals. To do this, 800 students from the University of Pennsylvania participated in a training program for 11 weeks, where everyone was engaged either alone or in a team. Some teams were based on support, while others were based on competition.

It turned out that students in groups based on competition were 90% more likely to come to class than everyone else.

From this we can conclude that rivalry increases the level of striving for one's goal. That being said, you don't need to talk about it. Don't tell those you train with that you want to lose weight. Put yourself in a competitive environment. This will make it easier for you to work out hard and not miss your workout. Namely, this will help to achieve what you want.