No excuses: persistent Sakinat Magomedova

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

The fates of the heroes of the No Excuses rubric are sometimes worthy of being the basis of a movie script. Looking at Sakinat Magomedova, one involuntarily asks the question, where does this smiling fragile woman have so much strength and light from? She was born in a small Chechen village, where children have never been seen without hands. The girl had to go through a lot, but she coped. She became a mother of two beautiful children and a world champion in parataekwondo.

Kid

- Hi, Nastya! Thanks for the invitation.

- I was born in the small Caucasian village of Kobi (Chechen Republic, Shelkovsky district). Then there was no ultrasound, and the birth of a girl without arms plunged everyone into shock.

The doctors advised my mother to abandon me. Probably, they were at a loss: there were only a few such cases throughout the country, not to mention Chechnya.

Relatives also persuaded to leave the child in the hospital. Why take on such a burden? The father left the family.

My mom was 22 at the time. I was her first child. And I think that she accomplished a real feat. Despite the pressure of society and the betrayal of her husband, she was not afraid of difficulties, she did not leave me. Although she perfectly understood that she would have to be with me all the time and there was nowhere to wait for support.

- I, like any child, wanted to play. But the children in the yard were not ready for the appearance of an unusual peer. It is now parents who bring up tolerance in their children, trying to explain that people are different. And then the adults themselves did not know how to behave with the armless girl.

At first I was a vulnerable child. I was offended by the questions and ridicule of the guys. I went to my mother in tears and complained. Having become a mother myself, I realized how painful it was at such moments. But mom never showed it. She said: “So what, they called me! Don't you have a language? Just think, pushed! Are you without legs?"

Mom taught me to protect myself. Soon I realized that I could not only fight back the bully, but also take revenge on the offenders.

- I felt strength and self-confidence. She began to get involved in conflicts herself. As soon as a boy tries to say something to me, I immediately get into a fight.

- Yeah. She could beat her with her feet no worse than with her hands.:) But, of course, then I didn't think that the ability to fight would ever benefit me.

In childhood, this was only a problem. It got to the point that my parents started coming to my mother and complaining that I had beaten their son. For my arrogant character, I was even expelled from kindergarten.

- Yes, I somehow managed to find a common language with the girls. We still communicate with some of them.

- I did not go to an ordinary school - my mother put me in a boarding school for disabled children. The guys there, of course, were different. I remember the first time I got there. I was six years old, they brought me, sat on the sofa, and all the children gathered to look at the new one.

At that moment I forgot that I had no hands. I thought I was the only one in the whole world. But it turned out that there are many of us and someone is in a worse position than me. It's a sin to complain: I have legs. Some do not have them either.

- Of course, there, too, each child had his own character, his own destiny, but we lived together. Everyone helped each other: someone could not dress himself, someone could not hold a spoon … Everyone helped everyone out, and thanks to this we were all quite independent.

- The boarding school was far from home, in the town of Bolkhov, Oryol region. I was taken there in the fall and picked up in May. By the time I graduated from the third grade, difficult times had come in the country in general and in our family in particular.

Mom got married and gave birth to her second child. Money was sorely lacking. During the next summer vacation, my mother asked me: "Sakinat, do you want to study further?" I really wanted to, study was easy for me. But if I said yes, my mother would have to sacrifice a lot in order to send me back to the boarding school in the fall. I understood the situation in the family and said that I had learned to write, read and count. What else is needed?

Adulthood

- Help mom around the house. Back in the boarding school, I learned to sew and knit with my feet. I was interested in everything, and I grasped everything easily: I looked, understood the essence and adapted.

In order not to sit around while my mother is at work, I washed and cleaned everything in the house. All she had to do was cook dinner. But then I started to cope with cooking.

I remember once I decided to cook some soup. She sat down to peel potatoes. First time in life. Oh, and I suffered with her! The potato is round, slips out, the legs were still small. Our relative lived with us in the same yard. She comes to me and sees how I am at war with these potatoes. Says: "Sakinat, let me help you?" I refused, refused, but in the end she peeled potatoes for me. Then she did everything herself. True, while I was cooking, I was so hungry that I ate two plates at once.

Then my mother came home from work. I ask her: "Will you eat?" She was stunned: who came, who cooked? I say: "I prepared it myself." "How are you?" - Mom was even more surprised. I told her: "First you sit down, eat, tell me whether it is tasty or not, and then you will ask questions."

So gradually I began to fry potatoes, make scrambled eggs and, in general, learned everything that a woman should be able to do.

- In fact, it doesn't matter how you do it: with your hands or feet, even with your teeth. I was always afraid to become a burden and tried to do everything myself.

I learned everything just from a great desire.

I can cook and clean and wash. The only thing is difficult to dress yourself. But children help.

- Honestly, without bending my heart, I can say that I don’t need hands. I was born without them and I live without them. At the same time, I feel happy.

It's just that even if you imagine how long it will take me to get used to life with hands, the need to re-learn everything … I don't want to waste time on this. I have much more important points - these are my children and sports.

After all, I was offered prostheses, including imported ones. I refused. I see no reason to carry on myself an extra weight, from which osteochondrosis develops and my head starts to ache. I used to be light and cheerful.:)

- Right-handed!

Basically, I do everything right. The left one serves as a support.

Sakinat - mother

- I grew up as a kid, and for a long time boys did not interest me at all. Except as sparring partners.:)

Of course, in adolescence, some kind of sympathy began to appear. But I never showed it to anyone. First, there were complexes: who needs me like that, who will marry me? And secondly, the guys treated me like a friend. I was sociable, cheerful, you could talk to me about a lot, joke, laugh, and most importantly - entrust a secret.

It turned out that people poured emotions into me, but I had nowhere to throw them out. Naturally, I really wanted to meet a loved one.

- Yes. We made nikah and began to live together. But six months later, I found out that I was expecting a child. He was probably not ready for this, or maybe he was just scared. He suggested that I get rid of the child.

I was already 21 years old - a formed person, with my own ideas about good and bad. I refused an abortion and left my husband.

- Of course, it's scary. After all, I understood that I even had nowhere to go with the child. At that time, I did not have my own home, and my pension was so miserable that it was impossible to rent an apartment. I had to live with friends. It was useless to wait for help from my relatives - I didn’t even tell them that I was pregnant.

But my mother taught me two of the most important things in life: to be able to stand up for yourself and never give up. Any problem, no matter how insurmountable it may seem, can be solved.

Therefore, I did not wait for some better times there, but decided to give birth. I just knew that there was still a way out.

- I began to find out if I could leave the child somewhere for a while until I solved the housing issue. I was prompted that it is possible to arrange him in a child's home. When my son was three months old, I did just that.

Of course, I constantly went to him, visited him so that he knew that I was his mother. At the same time, I queued up for an apartment and looked for earning opportunities. When she confidently got to her feet, she took her son. He is now 16 years old.:)

- Yes, she turned five in January. Patimat from a second marriage.

- Rather yes than no. I am a grove of children alone, and it simply cannot be otherwise. But I rarely scream or anything like that.

For example, I always talk with my daughter as with an adult. What's the point in swearing? A child from screaming will only be upset and will not understand anything. Therefore, I try to simply explain everything to the children.

- Moreover, I had to explain why some other aunt without an arm or some uncle without a leg.:) Children sometimes ask questions that are uncomfortable for adults. But this is not out of malice, it is curiosity. If their interest is satisfied by clearly naming the reason, for example, "the person was born that way" or "had an accident," they will no longer ask. And most importantly, they will treat a person with a disability absolutely normal.

Golden feet

- Already outdated. In November last year, at a competition in Turkey, I became the world champion.

- I have always dreamed of doing some kind of sports. But it was difficult to find a direction where the athlete could be without both arms.

In 2011, a young man called me and tried to explain something quickly and quickly. From his story, I understood only that he is a coach, saw my photo in the newspaper, where I hold my phone with my foot, and found me. I invited him to visit, and already in a personal conversation I learned that there is a recruitment for the parataekwondo national team. The coach told what kind of sport it is, what conditions are there.

I thought: "Finally, I will not just swing my legs!"

That's how unexpectedly my children's yard fights came in handy.:) I started going to trainings, and three months later I went to the European Championship.

- Entered the prize-winners. But those competitions for me are the most memorable of all. It seemed to me then that I didn’t know anything yet, I couldn’t do anything.

- Parataekwondo was only recently added to the list of Olympic sports. Our Olympics will be in 2020. Two of our guys will go to Rio for demonstration performances.

- Just at the championship in Turkey, I was injured. And not in battle, but just in training. She got up unsuccessfully and got an incomplete rupture of the anterior cruciate ligament.

My leg hurt, and I was afraid that I would break it at all. But it was impossible not to go into battle. After the championship there was an operation. I rehabilitated myself almost all winter. Now I am slowly starting to go to training again.

- No one. We take first place as a team in almost all competitions.:)

- A lot about what. But the most important desires are, perhaps, three.

Firstly, I want to have enough strength and health to get to the Paralympics-2020. I want the children to be proud of me.

Secondly, I want them to find their place in life and be happy.

And thirdly, I dream of getting a license. I signed up for a driving school, I go to classes, but I'm afraid that bureaucratic problems may arise. Although, even if there are some difficulties, I will achieve my goal: it is not my rules to pass.

- When they showed me around, many wrote to me and thanked me. They said that I inspired them to change their lives. I understand that not all people are naturally resistant, someone really needs additional motivation in life.

But I know for sure that there are no such problems that cannot be overcome. You can't just lose heart and give up. Something does not work? Try again and again, but get your way.

There are so many beautiful things in life, so many opportunities! You just need to stop complaining and see them.

- Thanks for the invitation!