How long-term relationships affect our health

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

The vows of the newlyweds that they will always be together, both in illness and in health, have never acquired such a literal meaning. Researchers have found that people who live together for a long time become like two peas in a pod and even adopt each other's illnesses.

What are you spending your best years on?

Scientists say: the longer we live with a partner, the more we change biologically. We become similar in everything. And this cannot be avoided in any way.

“Aging is something that couples go through together. Together you look at the world and make common decisions,”says Shannon Meja, a researcher at the University of Michigan.

Over time, you become connected not only emotionally, but also physically. It is as if you are completing sentences for each other, but now it is not your thoughts that are synchronized, but the muscles and cells.

My other half

Shannon Medja studied couples who have lived together for less than 20 years and couples whose relationship has lasted more than 50 years. It turned out that people who have lived side by side for several decades have significant similarities in kidney function, cholesterol levels and the work of certain muscles. The analysis took into account data on income, work and family relationships.

It is clear that we choose a pair for ourselves, based on certain characteristics, and the partner is somehow initially similar to us. But that doesn't explain why the similarities between partners are much stronger in couples who have lived together for several decades.

Shannon Medja believes that these similarities are what couples create together during their life together. The researcher is now studying how exactly the shared experience of partners influences the appearance of similar health problems.

Similar work was previously done by Christiane Hoppmann, an assistant professor at the University of British Columbia, who found that people living together for a long time have the same difficulty in completing everyday tasks. For example, going to the grocery store, preparing a full meal, or taking medication on time is equally difficult (or easy) for both partners. The same was true for depression - the couple suffered from depression and dealt with it together too.

Perhaps the key factor in understanding this problem is physical activity. For example, if a depressed partner refuses to leave the house, the other will feel obligated to sit within four walls as well. The longer this goes on, the more vulnerable the couple will become to a range of problems. This includes both worsening of the state of depression and the risk of developing diseases like diabetes.

But we have more than just bad news. There are also good ones.

We do everything together

William Chopik, assistant professor of psychology at Michigan State University, found evidence that optimism can work. He studied good mood and its effects on health and activity. To test how optimistic people look at the world, the researcher asked them to answer whether they agree or disagree with the statement "Even in the most troubled times, I hope for the best."

It turned out that if one of the partners maintains a general positive attitude, his companion or life partner will feel better. For example, diabetes or arthritis made themselves felt much less often and the symptoms of diseases were much less pronounced.

“Keeping your spouse in a positive mood is good for you too,” says William Chopik.

Why this is happening is not yet entirely clear. Some researchers believe that optimists are more inclined to healthy lifestyles and can positively influence their partners.

While scientists have yet to find the answer, it is clear how this discovery could impact healthcare. People in long-term relationships do not suffer from chronic ailments on their own. When one partner has a health problem, the other may be the cause. And that means - and part of the solution.