10 habits our grandmothers shouldn't adopt

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Not all wisdom is passed on by the older generation.

1. Accumulate trash

Our grandmothers, depending on their age, managed to catch several periods at once when, for one reason or another, not all goods were available. Therefore, you can understand their passion to buy and store things just in case. If it is so calmer for them, then they are free to dispose of their money and space as they please.

But you don't have to adopt this habit. First, chances are good that everything that you keep so carefully will never be useful to you. Secondly, few people own mansions of such areas in order to keep things in reserve without sacrificing comfort. Thirdly, it would be good to suppress the passion for unnecessary acquisitions already at the stage of purchase, first of all - for reasons of saving money.

Now the accumulation of things has no practical justification. You can buy literally anything and exactly when you need it. If you absolutely need to save something - save money, they will never fail.

2. Postpone the best for later

If you have looked into your grandmother's wardrobes at least once, you must have found a lot of conventionally festive things there. All this was bought for a special occasion, but it never came, and things deteriorated or outdated.

In one old magazine there was a story about how one family did not eat fresh bread until the old one ran out. As a result, they bought a fluffy bun every day, but never tasted it fresh, because yesterday's was served on the table. Things are about the same. Think of all those elegant sets that are in the sideboard while you eat from the chipped dishes. All those beautiful clothes that were waiting for the holiday, but out of fashion or no longer fit on you.

Acting on your grandmother's strategy, you save the best for some beautiful day. But why not make it beautiful today and enjoy what you have to the fullest.

3. To live out

Perhaps you have noticed the following trait among representatives of the older generation: they carry out some socially approved program - they work, raise children, retire, and then they seem to give up and start living out. They don’t spend money on themselves, don’t buy clothes, don’t update equipment, don’t try anything new, don’t travel.

In general, they are switching to an energy-saving and, most importantly, a "financial-saving" mode. If you ask why, it turns out that spending anything on yourself is inexpedient - dying soon. And in this mode, a person spends 10, 20, 30 years.

Meanwhile, elderly people can now live a full life. Perhaps with financial constraints - we remember the average pension in Russia, but still. And if you are in the prime of your working age, there is still time to make sure that modest finances do not overshadow your existence when you finally officially stop working.

4. Rejoice half-heartedly

Russians are quite pessimistic, and there are historical prerequisites for this. On the one hand, magical thinking, fear of the evil eye, works here: if you openly demonstrate your joy, then everything will immediately become bad.

On the other hand, in different periods of history, someone else's envy could corny lead to death, say, during dispossession of kulaks or the Great Terror. And therefore, even in folk wisdom, there is a need to hide well-being: "If you laugh a lot, you will cry a lot", "Happiness loves silence."

But nature has endowed us with emotions for a reason. This is a response to a particular situation. And their suppression can lead to negative consequences, up to mental problems. However, this is not the only point. Positive emotions have a beneficial effect on health, while negative ones do not. So be happy to the fullest.

Bad things in life do not happen because you were somehow not so happy before. It just happens, so enjoy the happy moments with a clear conscience.

5. Think in stereotypes

Jokes that for a grandmother at the entrance almost anyone can turn out to be a prostitute or a drug addict did not appear out of nowhere. Anything becomes a trigger: a skirt above the knee, a tattoo, or a door slammed too loudly (and it doesn't matter that the door closer and the person have nothing to do with it).

People of the old school often have only possible scenarios for all occasions: how to look, how to behave, what to do, what to think. And any deviation from them leads to a negative assessment of the person.

But the thing is, it's not just grandmothers. Young people willingly adopt stereotypical thinking and automatically take hostility towards everything unusual.

In general, stereotypes are not so harmful. They help us quickly assess the situations we face. But they also lock us in the narrow framework of their own - extremely small - experience.

Not everything unusual is bad. So, if you take your time with estimates, you can find out that the world is larger and more diverse than it seems.

6. Consider age as an argument in a dispute

You've probably seen articles like "15 wise advice from grandmothers." But only those of them that relate to your life turn out to be useful, as, indeed, any other recommendations. For example, the advice of a villager for cultivating a vegetable garden may be excellent and correct, but it is very likely that they will never be useful to a resident of a metropolis.

Therefore, it is not age that matters, but relevant experience. Moreover, it is vital and practical, and not only factual. A woman in years can give as much advice about a relationship as she likes, based on the fact that she and her husband have lived together for 50 years and have given birth to eight children. But you know for sure that the spouse periodically disappeared for several years with other women, and the three children were not from him, and they were constantly brawling and beating each other. What is more important here - the number of years or the quality of life?

This should be remembered not only in disputes. Don't refuse to listen to someone just because they are younger than you. There is a chance that he will be able to teach you a lot.

7. Prying your nose is not your own business

The word combination "Land of Soviets" has long been used mainly in an ironic way, when they talk about a long-standing tradition of interfering in other people's lives. It does not matter whether it is a close person or a casual passer-by, if he can be given a recommendation, he will not turn away from it. Such concepts as "personal boundaries" and "tactless questions" often do not exist among the older generation - they were invented here!

But, in fact, to go in with advice, if they were not asked, is bad form. People usually justify this behavior with a genuine desire to help, but they do it mostly for themselves. Someone is trying to feel their importance in the life of another person, someone is trying to dignify themselves against the background of a lack of performance who is not living his life correctly. But there are many other ways to assert yourself, it is not necessary to use such a traumatic one.

8. Trust authorities and do not check information

Many seniors are willing to believe any information from sources that they believe are trustworthy. If they said on TV that Australia was blown away by a meteorite, then you cannot prove otherwise. And don't even think about refuting the words of some respected Semyon Nikolayevich - where are you, and where is he.

It's funny, but with the current abundance of information, we behave, perhaps even more recklessly than our grandmothers. We can, for example, chuckle at her "they said on TV" and go read the posts of a blogger who has no medical education, but advises to be treated for cancer with vitamins. And we are also happy to trust people with whom we agree, although this is a so-so confirmation of the veracity.

Therefore, you should trust only those in whom you are sure, but it is also better to check their words from time to time.

9. Worry about what people think

The phrase "What will people think?" as a refrain it passes through many lives and spoils them very much. If you do not fit into someone's framework, this person will certainly think something about you, most likely unpleasant.

In theory, you can try to please everyone, meet everyone's expectations, and spend your whole life pretending. Whether you will be happy with this is a big question. So isn't it better to focus on what you think of yourself?

10. Living in the past

“Nowadays…” - you have definitely heard this phrase from elderly people a million times. Every person in the past has periods when he was incredibly happy. In difficult days for many, they become a refuge: yes, now events are not developing very well, but once upon a time what a life it was! There is nothing reprehensible in the search for support in the past, but this search can turn into an obsession with times long past.

And if all the best with a person, in his opinion, has already happened, then what is the point of straining - it will not be good anymore. And this has a bad effect on the present and the future. Therefore, it is worth remembering that the past is from the word "past." You need to take everything good from it and carry it with you further.