How to be alone and not feel guilty

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Even small changes in the schedule will help.

From time to time, it is beneficial for each person to pause and be alone for a while. This is necessary in order to think about something personal, to recharge with energy and, after a small reboot, enjoy life with a vengeance. Such short-term respites are needed by everyone, without exception.

However, for people prone to introversion, they are of much greater value. These moments of loneliness mean almost as much as sleep, eating and other natural physiological needs. If the introvert does not have time to be alone, it often leads to increased fatigue and depressed mood.

It would seem that everything is simple: if you want to be alone - stay, no one forbids. But here we are faced with a completely different problem that torments a considerable number of people. Her name is a sense of guilt, which only becomes more acute if you are not alone.

I’m already at work all day instead of spending time with loved ones. If I also start to retire, then I will completely stop seeing them.

The thoughts of a person who is gnawing at guilt

Many people make excuses for not being able to be alone with themselves in a more down-to-earth manner. It seems to them that if you add time for yourself to the list of current tasks, then it will grow to unimaginable sizes and something very important will be lost somewhere.

If you want to make time for a break without visibly compromising your busy schedule and feeling guilty on your heels, then follow certain tactics, which we will describe below.

Start by accepting

Your first step is awareness and acceptance. Accept that there is nothing wrong or selfish about wanting to be alone for a while. You will become much less irritable and restless if you are alone. So why not invest in yourself this way? Ultimately, you and your loved ones and your career will benefit from these breaks. However, even here you need to know when to stop.

Being alone with yourself doesn't mean spending the entire weekend playing video games, for example.

Such a pastime can hardly be called a full-fledged reboot. Rather, it is an unproductive pampering that will again lead you to the idea that it would be much more beneficial to spend time with family or friends. If you can't control yourself and go all out at the earliest opportunity, then it is better to set aside short periods of time during the week to be alone with you.

Make changes to your schedule

After you realize that there is nothing wrong with temporary loneliness, move on to the next step. It is about working on your schedule every day. There is no need to overhaul it, it is enough to make a few small changes. We offer you five strategies that you should follow in order to competently maintain the balance of "loved ones - loneliness". You can follow one of them, or combine several at once.

1. Wake up early

Anticipating the outraged exclamations, we hasten to reassure: not by much. Set your alarm at least 20 minutes earlier than usual. Use this time to do yoga, exercise, take a walk, or just sip coffee with your thoughts. However, if you got up earlier, this does not mean at all that you need to go to bed later. The latter can disrupt your sleep patterns and cause insomnia.

Don't set ambitious goals that you can't achieve. You don't need to set your alarm an hour or two earlier than usual. You may simply not need so much time for solitude every day. And do not torture yourself if you clearly see that you are not getting enough sleep. Perhaps this strategy just doesn't work for you.

2. Start or end your work day alone

It's not a bad idea to start the morning or end your workday in some cozy cafe. You will have about half an hour to be alone without much need to interact with the people around you. You can use this time to good use: read a book, make a plan for the next day, or think about how to spend the coming weekend.

If you do not have the opportunity or desire to go to different institutions, then rationally manage the time that you spend on the road. If you live close to work, walk. If the path is not short, then try as an experiment to give up using a smartphone or even listening to music in order to unload the brain a little.

3. Train alone

Use exercise as an opportunity to be alone with your thoughts. Go for a jog or walk regularly, use the pool or gym. This will help to keep yourself in good physical shape and at the same time will significantly improve your emotional state.

Some people enjoy listening to music while jogging: good soundtracks set the tone and mood for the whole day. Some, on the contrary, prefer to immerse themselves in their own thoughts instead of a constantly repeated playlist. Here the choice is yours: try both, and then decide what you like best.

If you are involved in some kind of team sport or have a regular sports partner, then build your training schedule in such a way that you can do it yourself at least once a week.

4. Replace meaningless breaks with really enjoyable ones

Rather than being unnecessarily distracted by checking your email or social media feed while you work, take some time for some truly enjoyable activities. Flip through a magazine that you still couldn't get your hands on, write a post on your personal blog, chat with friends, or eat something delicious.

5. Take time to rest regularly

Sometimes it seems that the whole world is up in arms against you. Finally, the thought that somewhere in the schedule is your personal time will help you not to lose heart.

It is especially difficult if you are a family person and household chores just cover you with your head. Try to negotiate with someone from the family to replace you for a short time. When your energy is depleted, even a short break can be helpful during which you can relax.

If your family has small children, make a simple schedule of who and when will feed them, bathe, put them to bed and read a story before going to bed. This will help avoid a whole bunch of conflicts and at the same time allow each of the partners to make time for themselves. And it is unlikely that after that you will be tormented by a feeling of guilt.