How to ignore negative comments online

2024 Author: Malcolm Clapton | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 03:44

Negative comments are unsettling and ruin your mood and self-esteem. In the meantime, the trolls are pouring tons of negativity on the Internet, and paying attention to each of them, you will get stressed very soon. Learn as soon as possible an important online survival skill - ignoring harsh, rude, and obviously provocative comments.

Have you ever heard the proverb "An empty barrel thunders harder"? So they say about narrow-minded people who express their opinion louder and more often than others, but in fact they do not know anything and say nonsense.

The proverb is old, but it does not lose its relevance: to this day, the one who expresses his opinion loudest or even tries to impose it, as a rule, is not very smart or talented.

Immediately it is necessary to warn that we are not talking about all negative comments, but only about the most "loud", with unfounded attacks.

There are negative but adequate comments that you can respond to, with which you can work. The person, after solving his problem, thanks and apologizes. And there are simply moronic comments: "nonsense", "nonsense" or "the author is a moron" - such a bathhouse, because they are not substantiated by anything.

Tanya SMM-specialist of Lifehacker

The more vividly a person criticizes and casts skepticism on any materials, the louder his negative comments sound, the more empty this person is. This applies not only to the emptiness in the place of intelligence (it can be very smart and well-read). It can be emptiness in the place of the heart, emptiness in the soul, emptiness in life, or emptiness at the place of self-esteem.

The loudest comments, the harshest and harshest of them are made not because the person really has a reason to add them. Rather, they sound like proof that the commentator is unhappy, and the material simply becomes a target into which the person discharges a clip of their hatred and dissatisfaction with life.

Such trolls are found in reality. These are people who try to disrupt a seminar or a public speech, throw negative comments at the speaker and simply prevent them from continuing.

And of course, there are trolls in their personal lives. Among friends and acquaintances, there are people who can condemn your lifestyle and direction of development - in general, everything that you are doing and have already done.

Moreover, their views can be quite flat and one-sided, they can behave hostile for some ridiculous reason, if you even know little and did not communicate very often. So what do you do with them all? First of all, do not waste your time on them.

The main mistake is reaction to negativity

People who have not yet learned how to deal with negative comments react sharply to them and feel that they have some responsibility for them.

At the same time, a person sees that the comment is illogical, and the attacks are unjustified, but he cannot help himself - his mood spoils, he continues to ponder a comment or an unpleasant conversation in reality. In general, he spends his time and mood on it, believes that he must somehow react to it.

Thoughts appear: "How did I cause such a reaction of a person?", "What is wrong with me?"

In the end, a person may come to this conclusion: “Everyone is right, and I am wrong. It's my fault . After that, the person tries to avoid a series of stinging statements and conflicts. In other words, he thinks how not to provoke people to new negative comments.

Trying to please everyone in a row, you will simply spend more time on the work that otherwise, without regard to the violently criticizing the public, you would do twice as fast and better. Are they worth your time? After all, you still cannot please the trolls, moreover, they are not really interested in the quality of your work.

Waste of attention and time on trolls is unjustified

Of course, you pay more attention to trolls and their statements than calm and neutral reviews. This is because they sound louder, sharper, and rougher. You start responding to their comments, preparing your answers more carefully than if you answered questions and comments in a calm or friendly tone.

In general, you are wasting your time and energy, paying much more attention, but the trolls do not need this. They do not need you to give a detailed and competent answer, they do not need proof of your innocence. Whatever you write to them in an attempt to prove your point of view, in return you will receive only negative comments and new portions of bile.

Therefore, it is not worth spending time on them at all, or at least it is not worth spending more time on them than on other comments and reviews.

A comment does not deserve more attention just because it is louder, harsher or harsher. This does not make it more important or meaningful.

Moreover, such comments mean even less than others. Their text is dictated by the inner emptiness of the commentator himself, but what do you care about empty people?

Here are seven tips to help you get rid of the influence of negative comments and a waste of time. So what should you do to stop paying attention to them?

1. Understand that loud does not mean important

Sometimes loud comments mean nothing - they are empty. Therefore, they deserve less attention than others, or do not deserve it at all.

2. Learn to tell the difference between good advice and useless noise

Throughout life, we are given a lot of advice, but this does not mean that you have to listen to each of them. Before taking advice and reflecting on it, determine if the advice fits with your worldview, does not conflict with your values, and whether it will help you achieve your goals. If you answered “no” to all three questions, you can safely throw the advice out of your head.

You stop worrying very quickly when you realize that the picture of the world in the head of an evil commentator will never coincide with yours. It remains to give him the opportunity to speak out, and if he comes to direct insults and personal attacks, ban him. And so we have freedom of speech.

Alexey Ponomar

3. Deliberately shift focus to the right people

Instead of paying attention to "loud" people just because they are more harsh and aggressive than others in expressing their opinion, consciously focus on people whose opinion really matters, commentators, whose knowledge and experience will be useful to you. Before reacting to a negative comment, look at who left it. This will help you to react correctly and understand whether it is worth paying attention to it or not.

Someone else's opinion is subjective, and I estimate from whom such a comment. If it's just the accountant Katya, the manager Petya or the welder Kolya, then it's not a shame; if it is a specialist or an expert in my field, it will be sad and even unpleasant.

Tanya SMM-specialist

4. Realize that the "right" people can be quiet

There are people who support you, help and encourage you, but do not seek to importunate your attention. You may not notice them, because they do not express anything harsh and critical, which immediately catches your eye and makes you nervous, but their support can be very helpful to you. Find such people among your commentators and turn your attention from screamers and trolls to such people.

5. Apply the "99: 1" rule when dealing with loud people

If in life you often have to deal with trolls, use the "99: 1" rule. Instead of giving them most of your attention, leave only 1% to isolate constructive criticism, if any, and devote the remaining 99% to people who praise and support you or talk about shortcomings in a friendly and calm manner, really wanting to help.

6. Use praise to move forward

You can develop on the basis of criticism or, conversely, on the fertile soil of praise and encouragement. When the development process is triggered by criticism, you constantly correct your mistakes, and when praise comes into play, you develop from your inner strength, gain more self-confidence. So focus on positive feedback from your content and actions, and use the 99: 1 principle for praise and criticism.

7. Remember that empty people deserve sympathy

Always remember that loud and angry comments are left by empty people, so you can only feel sorry for them. At the same time, you are not to blame for their emptiness and you are not responsible for it, so you should not deal with them and let them into your life.